Pushing Through the Pain

My son Pax ran his first 5K this weekend. He carried himself with a combination of excitement and anxiousness in the days leading up to the race. More than anything, he just didn't know what to expect. But as we were mere moments from beginning the race, he was beyond excited.

I told him I would stay by his side every minute of the race. He would set the pace, and I'd stick with him. The opening moments were fantastic.....which lasted all of a half mile. Then, things turned south quickly. I'm not sure he had ever ran more than a half mile in his life, so I was expecting 3.1 miles to break him......and break him it did! His legs hurt. His foot hurt. His lungs hurt. He was facing physical, mental, and emotional demons. He wanted to quit. It was too hard. He wasn't good enough. He wasn't strong enough. He didn't belong there. The self-talk was crushing. There was crying. There was yelling. There was the innocent 8-year-old kid's version of swearing.

My goal was to push him hard enough to step up to the challenge, but not so hard that he'd snap. I would pick out a landmark in the distance and say, "Alright, man, we're going to jog from here to that yellow sign, then we'll walk again. Let's push through the pain." He'd say no a few times, then relent. Then, we'd repeat that cycle all over again.

As we turned the final corner and approached the last tenth of a mile, we could see the finish line. "Pax, I want you to sprint to the finish line with everything you got. Don't leave any gas left in the tank. Just go for it!" And he did! He took off and gave it everything he had. He collapsed to the ground as soon as he crossed the finish line. I couldn't tell if he was happy, sad, angry, or some other emotion. Ultimately, I realized he was just really dang proud of himself. He did something he didn't think was possible. He pushed through the pain, and that was a grander award than any medal he could have received.

Pushing through the pain is one of life's greatest lessons. Success isn't accomplished in the absence of pain. Rather, it's something that happens amidst, in, and through the pain. Pain is inevitable, but it's what we do with the pain that dictates our fate.

This applies to 5Ks, money, work, entrepreneurship, relationships.....everything! Please don't avoid pain. Don't run away from it. Don't hide from it. Pain isn't something to be avoided. It's something to be confronted head-on. When we do, we grow. We win. We prove to ourselves that we can (and should) do things that matter.

I don't know if Pax will ever run a 5K again, but I'm 100% certain he just learned a valuable lesson that will carry with him for decades to come. Push through the pain!

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A Streak of One

Someone recently asked how many days in a row I've published a blog. "Almost 900." "Wow, that's amazing! How in the world do you write 900 days in a row?"

This post isn't about my blog, but the blog provides a tangible example of a very simple and powerful concept. Here was my response to my friend: "It's simple. A 900-day streak is really just 900 one-day streaks. Just take care of today. Tomorrow can wait until tomorrow."

If I think about writing 900 days in a row, it seems unreasonable and unreachable. However, when I think about just writing one post today, that feels workable. Then tomorrow, I'll do the same again.

It reminds me of when I started intermittent fasting (no calories between dinner and noon the following day). My goal was to fast for a week. One day at a time, I achieved my goal. Day 1, then day 2, then day 3.....each day, focusing solely on that day's goal. What started as a goal to fast for one week has become a lifestyle. I don't even think about fasting anymore because it's just part of me. It's now been a fundamental part of my life for over two years, and it's radically changed my life. The same goes for writing, a teeth brushing, and tucking my kids in at night, and going to bed.

Using an obviously silly example, I never set out to brush my teeth for 15,000 consecutive days. Rather, I just took care of business one day, then did it again the next. After enough repetition, it becomes part of our daily rituals.

Here's my good news today: Anything can become a habit, a ritual, a streak. Some of you have ridiculously large dreams, but continuously fall short. Perhaps today is the day to start a streak of one. One repetition. Just one. Then, tomorrow, maybe you'll do it again. Oh wow, two days in a row! How about just one more day? If you're not careful, it will become engrained into the fabric of your life, fully solidified as a piece of you.

I'm not asking you to start a 1,000-day streak. Instead, today, I encourage you to start a streak of one.

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Biting Off More Than You Can Chew

Have you ever said "yes" to something that was far bigger than what you were capable of? Something you had no business saying yes to? Something that almost makes you feel like an idiot for even considering? I've had my share:

• As a 19-year-old, running a college program responsible for bringing celebrities to campus to speak and perform (which usually included dinner and airport drives with said celebrities).

• Adopting twin baby boys.

• Managing billions of dollars of real estate portfolios for some of the largest investors in the world.

• Building a coffee company.

• Launching a podcast when I knew absolutely nothing about podcasting.

• Committing to writing, editing, and publishing one blog post per day for the next twenty years.

To be honest, I shouldn't have said yes to a single one of these. I wasn't qualified for any of them. There was definitely a possibility I would fail. There were absolutely more qualified people for the job.

But saying yes to these types of things is how we grow. It's how we expand our capabilities. It's how we make an impact. Anyone can coast, do the easy things, and simply get by. The art of pushing oneself is also the art of moving the proverbial needle.

I recently said yes to something new. I'm terrified. I'm in way over my head. I might fail. There are most certainly more qualified people than me. But here we are. This new endeavor will soon take me to a faraway land, a completely unfamiliar place. I will be pushed and challenged in ways I've never known. It sounds terrible.....it sounds amazing!

I can't say much about it yet, but rest assured, you will hear plenty about it in due time. Some of you, if interested, will also receive an invitation to get involved. It will be exciting. In the meantime, I'll just be over here in the fetal position, repeatedly asking myself why I just signed up for one of the most intimidating things I've ever been part of.

I hope you bite off more than you can chew today. I hope you say yes to something ridiculous and scary. Not so that you can fail (though you might), but so you can make an impact. You will no doubt grow along the way as well.

Conquer the day!

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When the Experts Aren’t Experting

Yesterday's post landed well and resulted in much dialogue. I've received countless questions, responses, and personal testimonies. Then, I received an unexpected message from a close friend. This friend denounced my insights and said he will trust social media influencer xyz, who says we should sell all of our assets and wait out the storm. I looked up xyz influencer and immediately noticed a few things:

• He has a ton of followers

• He's super young

• He's only been investing for a few years

• He has a twisted and underwhelming understanding of finance

Why did my friend choose to follow the advice of this far less experienced and less knowledgeable person? Because this person has 100x more social media followers than I do. Translation: This guy is an expert.

It reminds me of a story I think about often. When Sarah and I first became parents, I was worried about my kids developing food allergies. It never sat well with me that more people than ever have allergies, and I desperately wanted my kids to avoid it. With this concern in mind, I sought the best expert I could find.

At the time, I was on a non-profit board of directors with a man who founded one of the world's largest food allergy testing labs. He was a pioneer in the field. He had zero social media followers. He's not famous. His face isn't plastered all over the internet. His video clips haven't gone viral. He's a good, humble, honest, and wise man.

I approached him with my concern. Was there anything I could do as a parent to help prevent food allergies from being an issue with my children? He gave me an overwhelming "yes" response and shared his wisdom on preventing food allergies. In short, his advice flew in the face of all the so-called "experts" spouting off their opinions. It was simple. It was profound. Fast forward eight years, and we don't have a single food allergy. Is that because of my friend's advice? Is it because my kids simply had a genetic disposition against food allergies? We may never know, but I trusted a true expert.

A few years later, this conversation came up with a trusted friend about to have her first child. She, too, had the same allergy concern as I did. I shared the wise advice of my allergy expert friend, and she thanked me.

Fast forward a year, I asked her if she followed my friend's advice. No, she didn't. Ultimately, she trusted the advice of a few famous social media moms who had opinions on the subject. The advice was the opposite of my friend's advice. The result? Every one of her kids has food allergies.....bad food allergies. Was it because of her approach? Was it because her kids simply had a genetic disposition toward food allergies? We may never know, but she trusted a famous person with an opinion.

We need to discern our sources carefully. It's so easy to get swept up by the loudest and sexiest voices. There is so much bad information floating around out there. Be careful. Be vigilant. Be discerning.

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The Big 3

My head is spinning. Too many ideas. Too many projects. Too many tasks. Too many next-steps. Too many follow-ups. Too many everythings. It feels like too much. Can you relate? I feel like this often, but this particular idea was hitting especially hard for me last night. I hope someday, someone will teach me the secret to all of this. Until then, I will do what I always try to do: The Big 3.

The Big 3 is a simple idea I heard several years ago. No matter how many things are on the to-do list today, designate the three most important things. The three things that, if accomplished, it doesn't matter what else I got done. The three things that, no matter what else happens today, the day is still considered a win. The three things that, despite the noise and chaos, WILL get accomplished.

I feel like a failure often.....daily. However, the Big 3 help me find the right wins to celebrate and the grace to forgive myself once again. In this very moment, I'm trying to figure out what mine are for today. The bad news is I'm definitely going to fail today. The good news is I absolutely 100% will achieve my big 3. I hope you do, too!

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On the Other Side of Fear

I spent part of yesterday meeting with an awesome couple experiencing some pretty crazy life changes. To my surprise, the wife said I once told her something that has continuously stuck with her. I don't remember saying it, but it sounds like something I would say. "There's nothing in life worth doing that doesn't involve fear."

We humans tend to treat fear as a warning sign that we shouldn't do something, but I think it's quite the opposite. Fear is a tell that we SHOULD do it. Often, what we want most is directly on the other side of fear. Based on some recent major decisions, this couple is certainly living out this principle. It's exciting - and encouraging - to see.

Coincidentally, I'm about to face one of my biggest fears in a few hours.

14 years ago, I suffered a crippling foot injury. After nearly two months on crutches and countless specialist consultations, it was recommended that I have the nerves cut out of the bottom of my right foot. Thankfully, one surgeon stepped in and pointed me in a better path. Turns out, I had torn a tendon and fractured a joint on the bottom of my foot, causing nerve-damage-like symptoms. That set the table for more than a year of physical therapy, which concluded with a warning that I may never be able to independently walk without wearing a splint. Fast forward about four years, and not only was I walking without a splint, but I had full athletic ability with that foot. I was so grateful!

Then, not long after that, I experienced a crushing back injury. I again spent more than a year in physical therapy, trying to regain a sense of normal again. While I've definitely regained normal day-to-day function, my basketball career ended 10 years ago when that injury occurred. I haven't played one bit of competitive full-court basketball since.

Here's where the fear comes in. Today, I'll be participating in an alumni basketball tournament with some of my old high school teammates. It's been 25 years since I've seen some of them. We're playing in my old high school gym. We'll be playing against teams 20 years younger than us. We'll have at least three games. I'm terrified. This will either be the most fun day of my year, or an unmitigated disaster. You best believe you'll find out which way this goes.

There's something profoundly beautiful about going head-first through our fears. Sure, we could play life safe, taking the easy path at every opportunity. That would certainly save us a lot of failure, embarrassment, and pain. But it would also rob us of meaning and fulfillment.

I really don't want to do what I'm about to do, but I'll be so glad I did it. I hope you have your own version of that in your life soon. Please don't shy away from the fear. Lean into it. Go through it!

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Yes, Too Simple

I ran into a friend at a coffee shop yesterday. It was good to see him, but he had a bone to pick with me. He wasn't actually mad at me, but he did have a problem with yesterday's post. "The thing that bothers me about your content is that you oversimplify things." That was the best compliment I received all week! It made my day!

Here's my beef. Personal finance is typically treated like some sort of above-people's-heads, MBA-level rocket science. In fact, the entire financial industry is constructed that way to convince people they need to hire outside help (you know, the experts!). They are masters at taking simple things and making them complicated. On the flip side, my entire mission is to bring it back the other way and simplify the things that have been artificially made to seem complicated.

Would you believe the buddy I mentioned above is in the financial industry? What a coincidence! Meanwhile, I received a bunch of messages from current and former clients who affirmed the simplicity of implementing yesterday's idea. They said it felt weird at first, but once they recalibrated their life around this new mode of operation, it finally made their finances easy to navigate. Boom!

Simplify, simplify, simplify. If it doesn't seem too simple, it means it's not simple enough yet. I don't know about you, but I have far more important and meaningful things to do in my life than spend my time, energy, and worry on complex finances.

If you're interested in simplifying your finances and need some ideas on where to start, we just published a seven-part series on our Meaning Over Money Podcast called 101 (episodes 405-411). In it, we tackle some of the most foundational topics in personal finance and get back to the basics. Topics include:

• Budgeting

• Navigating lumpy expenses through the use of sinking funds

• Personal spending in marriage

• Managing inconsistent or volatile income

• The power of non-retirement taxable investing

• Life Insurance

• Taxes

If any of these sound interesting to you, check them out. They are 100% free and can be found on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts. If you know someone in your life who could benefit from them, please consider sharing.

I hope you have a meaningful and SIMPLE day. Always remember, you have far more important things to do than spend all your time and energy dealing with your finances. Simplify!

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Learning vs. Doing

I love learning! Reading books, watching YouTube videos, asking experts.....all of it. For me, there's nothing more beautiful than transitioning from ignorance to competence, from weakness to strength.

However, I'm witnessing a problem develop in our current culture. With unlimited resources at our disposal - often for low or no cost - we're becoming so fixated on learning that we're not actually doing.

We learn how to do something, then learn more about how to do it, then maybe learn a little bit more about how to do it better......and never actually do it. I watch people read six books on a subject, but never put into practice the ideas or concepts they learned.

At some point, it needs to move from our brains to our hands and feet. Knowledge does no good if it's not put into practice. Ignorant action is always more productive than expert inaction.

This is why all the talking heads bother me so much. It's easy to spout off about how people should do this or do that, but where is the fruit? Are they walking the walk, or just talking the talk?

I'm all about educating ourselves and committing to learning new skills and ideas, but my bigger focus is action. Oh yeah, and sometimes failure through doing is the best lesson we can receive. The real world is the ultimate classroom.

My encouragement today is to do. Yes, educate yourself. Digest material, listen to experts, and seek out development......but do! Whatever that thing is in your world today, take action. Even if you're not ready, fully educated, or well-equipped, just do. Put one foot in front of the other and give it your best shot. Trial by fire is a wonderful teacher.

As for me, I have two projects on my plate today that I'm absolutely not equipped to tackle. I'm nervous. I'll probably fail. I'm most certainly going to get frustrated with myself. I'll definitely be seeking research and education on a few nuances along the way. But I'll be doing. One way or another, I'm moving forward. And no matter what happens, I'll be better for it.

I wish you the same today! Have an awesome day!

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Too Too Much of a Good Thing

Yesterday was a fun day. We had the opportunity to spend some time in the sun at a phenomenal little resort right along the ocean. It was absolutely beautiful. Unfortunately, it ended up being too much of a good thing….or maybe too too much. With some combination of sun sickness and food poisoning, I spent the last 18 hours with some of the worst sicknesses imaginable. I'll save you the gory details, but my favorite part was the horrid hallucinations.

That's why you're receiving this post later than usual, as I have been at death's doorstep until this very moment.

Yesterday was a very harsh reminder that too much of a good thing is never a good thing. The sun was amazing, but seven hours of constant sunlight while hanging right next to the Equator is not a good thing. I got punished for my overzealousness.

The same goes for nearly every area of life: Money, stuff, status, relationships, food, vacation. For each of these, there's enough. The amount that will add value to your life, retain a healthy balance, and live a quality life. Then, there's too much of a good thing. Once we cross that line into too much territory, these things no longer benefit us, but start deteriorating us.

The trouble is it's sometimes difficult to recognize when we've crossed that line. The worst thing we can do is anchor ourselves to what other people are doing, as I did yesterday. When we use others as the point of comparison, we're likely to inadvertently jump off the cliff because we followed them right off. Just because others were getting seven hours of straight Equator-level sunshine, it doesn't mean I should be. Similarly, just because your peers are buying monster houses, fancy new cars, and funding a lifestyle that should only be reserved for a multi-millionaire, it doesn't mean you have to. Don't anchor yourself to others.

Instead, we need to decide what's enough. What's enough sun? What's enough house? What's enough car? What's enough lifestyle? If we make this conscious decision, we can live a healthier and more fulfilling life.

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Oh, I Have Landmines!

Yesterday's post landed hard with many, but one particular response triggered today's piece. "Travis, how did you manage to avoid all the landmines?" It never occurred to me that some people think I speak from a position of having lived a stellar and unblemished financial life. It reminds me that I need to share my early adulthood story again soon. There are so many new readers who don't yet know about my brutal failings. 

Today, I want to share the story of one of my landmines. Surprise, it involves a car! Heading into college, I drove a 13-year-old Honda Civic (with old-school flip-up headlights). I paid $2,000 for that car, and it was shockingly reliable. It wasn't pretty, but it was mine and got the job done (it had a pretty sweet stereo, too!). 

However, before my second year of college, my parents suggested I upgrade my car to more reliably manage my 4-hour drives between home and college. I don't remember disagreeing with this idea, as I think a modest breeze would have pushed me over the edge to purchase a cooler car. Thus, the car shopping began. 

Almost any car would have been better than my existing car. At that point, it was probably worth $500-$1,000 and had a ton of miles on it. My options were unlimited! Wanna know what I landed on? I purchased a 2-year-old Acura Integra. Black with black leather, stick shift, fully loaded. It was so awesome! Oh yeah, and it cost $19,000. I don't think thatnumber does my stupidity justice. Adjusting for inflation, that's the equivalent of an 19-year-old buying a $40,000 car today. Wow, just wow. I, of course, didn't have the money for this purchase…..I was a broke college kid with little cash. That's the moment the destructive debt cycle started to churn in my life. In making that purchase, I signed up for years of monthly payments that I needed to make via an on-campus job. I was going to work anyway, but in hindsight, there were lots of things I would rather have spent that money on. 

That single decision set the table for what would eventually be dozens of terrible decisions....more landmines. After all, stepping on one landmine makes us more susceptible to stepping on another. 

The question to answer today is how to reverse the landmine cycle. Here's what I did:

• First, realize you stepped on one. We can't fix what don't know is broken. It took me years to realize I screwed up…..but better late than never. 

• Second, commit to avoiding these types of future landmines at all costs. For me, that meant deciding I would NEVER use debt to buy a car again....ever.

• Third, we must pay the price to actually heal the damage. In my case, that meant paying off the car and subsequently saving up cash to eventually buy a different vehicle. Further, I needed to humble myself and eventually downgrade cars. The following car I bought was a $10,000 Honda Accord….with cash. 

That entire mess took 8 years to clean up, but it's a landmine I will never step on again. It's ok if you've screwed up, but it's time to clean up the mess and move on. Trust me, it's beautiful on the other side.

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Stepping On Landmines

I had a tremendously fun talk in Los Angeles last night. It was a great opportunity to reconnect with old friends and meet some new ones. I had some wonderful chats with people before and after the event, plus some great Q&A immediately following my talk. A common thread was woven into so many of these stories, which is a similar thread I experience in my day-to-day talking with people about money. Every story about financial pain, struggle, or failure starts with a singular moment where the person made a mistake or experienced a misfortune. I call it stepping on landmines.

Here's an example. A buddy shared the story about how he's in a really tough financial situation. He started with his present, then worked his way backward. The story culminates at the beginning, where he steps on his first landmine. He purchased a car he couldn't afford with a monthly payment nobody should afford. That was a landmine. That singular decision set up and set off a chain reaction that spiraled him to where he currently sits.

Story after story after story, each being triggered by the first landmine. The problem with landmines is that once we step on one, it becomes easier and more likely we'll step on another. After all, we don't make the best decisions under duress.

We obviously can't go back and unstep on our own landmines. I have many I wish I could undo. If we can't necessarily unwind our past landmines, what's the point? I have two points on this.

First, simply being aware of this phenomenon will allow us to be vigilant when the NEXT landmine approaches. We don't have to step on it. Instead, we can have the spatial awareness that we're nearing a landmine, but this time, sidestep it. Doing so frees us from the potential consequences, including the increased susceptibility of stepping on another. Just a few key decisions like this have the potential to radically shift our lives forever.

Second, we can help others around us avoid their own. In addition to the landmine stories, I shared some beautiful conversations with other people yesterday. These are people I care about deeply. With whatever insight and influence I had to offer, I was able to shine a light on a few upcoming landmines in their lives. It would be so wonderful if they were able to avoid them. If one thing I said helps one person take a different path, it was a monumental day. That's the opportunity each one of us has today. If we can help one person avoid one landmine, we've changed their world....possibly forever.

I hope you find that encouraging today, because I sure do! Have a great day!

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Would You Take Their Advice?

Receiving criticism has become a full-time endeavor for me. I used to hate it, but it's grown on me in the past several years. First, the act of being criticized means you're doing something. It's easy to avoid criticism by simply doing nothing. Second, I've learned that receiving criticism is a natural byproduct of giving opinions, and when you provide opinions publicly (blog, podcast, speaking, etc.), you are sure to receive criticisms publicly.

One of my clients recently started to receive quite a bit of criticism.....I mean a lot! First, it means he is doing something. He's trying to move the needle in an area he strongly believes in. Second, since he's doing said work in the public eye, he will inevitably face public criticism.

During a recent meeting, he asked, "How do you do it? Just take all the criticism that comes your way? Does it make you want to give up?"

That's when I shared with him a golden piece of advice I once received from a 16-year-old youth group kid several years ago. It was a typical night at youth group, and each of us was sharing one highlight and one lowlight from the week ("Wows and Pows"). One of mine was that something I said on Twitter triggered hundreds of angry and hateful comments. I felt down. I felt defeated.

That's when my young friend jumped in. "Would you take their advice?"

"Who?"

"The people who are saying hateful things to you. Would you take advice from them?"

"No, of course not!"

"Well, if you wouldn't take their advice, you can't take their criticism."

Boom! Just like that, this young woman disarmed all my insecurity. She was right. If I wouldn't take advice from the people levying all that criticism on me, why should I care about their negative comments? That paradigm shift has changed everything for me!

If someone criticizes my personal financial decisions or advice, I ask myself if I'd take financial advice from them. Do I want my finances to look more or less like theirs?

If someone criticizes my business decisions, I ask myself if I'd take business advice from them. Do I want my business to look more or less like theirs? Heck, do they even have a business?

If someone criticizes my parenting, I ask myself if I'd take parenting advice from them. Do I want my kids to be more or less like theirs? Often, it's people that don't even have kids!

Some of you need to hear this today. Others may not need it today, but be sure to stick this one in your back pocket; the criticism is coming! Anything worth doing will result in criticism. Buckle up and enjoy the ride!

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Snowballing Behaviors

As I recently discussed HERE and HERE, I've been a big fan of my new walking pad. Practically overnight, I quadrupled the number of steps I get each day (up to nearly 13,000 per day over the past five weeks). In the paradigm of what gets measured gets done, this endeavor has been a massive success.

There's another phenomenon at play here, too. Behaviors often snowball. When we change one behavior, others typically follow. Here's what that looks like in my little walking pad world:

• After enjoying Sarah's walking pad so much, I purchased a second one for my home office (along with a desk to go with it).

• One of my buddies asked if I use a biometric scale to track my body composition. I didn't, but I immediately purchased the scale he recommended. I now collect daily data.

• Since I know I'm collecting daily data, I feel more accountable for the decisions I make throughout my day (including my diet).

• Since I'm trying to make better decisions, I dusted off my home gym and have now gotten back into regular lifting.

All because Sarah purchased a silly little walking pad, and I decided to hop on for a few minutes. Behaviors snowball, and I'm really glad I started gaining momentum on these particular behaviors.

Money is much the same way. My goal isn't to get my clients to adopt dozens of well-planned behaviors. Instead, my focus is to help them create a healthy rhythm with just one or two, then trust the snowballing will happen. Budgeting is a perfect example. Once someone starts budgeting:

• They realize they spend money on things they really don't care about. Thus, spending behaviors change.

• Once they realize they aren't a victim of their finances and can regain control of what happens with their money, they get emboldened to pay off debt. Thus, they 10x their aggression toward getting debt-free.

• Paying off debt shows them they can do anything they put their mind to, including saving. Thus, saving momentum improves.

• Once they realize they can dial up their saving momentum, they start believing they can attain things they value. Thus, they prioritize and give themselves permission to spend on things that add value to their life.

• As they gain more insight into their money behaviors, they notice they aren't giving nearly as much as they would like. Thus, it creates an intentional bend toward generosity.

• As they gain better control and momentum in their finances, they realize they aren't beholden to their jobs. Thus, they give themselves permission to pursue work that matters (if they aren't already in it).

• Once they've fully come to terms with the fact that there is a better way to handle and perceive money than society taught them, they aspire to help their kids do it differently and avoid the painful mistakes they've made. Thus, the next generation is transformed.

All because they decided to work a few small financial habits into their lives. This stuff is powerful. Let your (good) behaviors snowball. It might just change everything.

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What’s the Worst That Could Happen?

One of my friends has a unique business idea. Another friend is interested in starting a non-profit. A third friend wants to write a book. A fourth desires to publish music. All four are stuck, paralyzed with fear. Fear of what? Failure. All four are scared of falling flat on their face, getting embarrassed, or feeling like losers. Thus, there's a very real chance they perpetually hold onto their ideas and eventually take them to their graves.

Here's a question I posed to each of them: "What's the worst that could happen?" You know, the absolute worst-case, total destruction, end-of-the-world scenario. Dream big, but in the form of nightmares. Visualize how terrible and life-ending these what-if situations could be.

All four disappointed me. When pressed to provide the most atrocious endings possible, all they could muster was some version of "My pride would be hurt, and I'd have to do something different."

In actuality, there's no real long-lasting consequence for failure other than ego, pride, and self-esteem. If that's true, why not just go for it? Why carry the regret of not doing something if there's so little downside? Why throw away the possibility of something great simply because there's a chance for something marginally bad to happen?

I come from the world of risk and reward. Understanding what could happen if things go right or when things go wrong, then making the best go/no-go decision with the information available. When it comes to our dreams, we're so quick to throw away the proverbial million-dollar reward because we're scared of the hundred-dollar risk.

So what if my friend's business fails. At least he'll know he gave it his best shot.

So what if my friend's non-profit doesn't survive. At least he'll have made an impact on people's lives.

So what if my friend's book sucks. At least she'll have worked through the process, possibly preparing her for the next opportunity.

So what if nobody listens to my friend's music. At least he will know he created something nobody can ever take away.

The upside in each of these is so high, but the downside so limited.

I know I'm going to fail at many things this year, some of them publicly. It will be embarrassing. It will bruise my ego. It will damage my pride. It might even cost me some money. But at least I'll know. At least I'll go to bed at night knowing I gave it my best shot. The worst-case scenarios are pretty lame. But the upside? Oh, the upside is so freaking cool!

If you're ever in doubt, play out the worst-case scenario. Dream big, but in nightmares. Challenge yourself to pinpoint just how bad it could get. My guess is it's not nearly as bad as you think, and if so, why not just go for it?

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Today is the Youngest Day of Your Life

I had the privilege of speaking to a youth group last night, and not just any youth group. It's the same youth group I participated in as a leader for ten years. I was invited to speak on the topic of integrating our faith with our finances. Overall, it went fantastic. The kids were engaged, interactive, showed me lots of love, and even laughed at my dumb jokes (pity laughs still count!).

We call this the “Junkyard pose.”

We covered topics including the behavioral science of money and happiness, the importance of being a good steward, avoiding debt, and finding a healthy balance between spending, saving, and giving. I hope it moved the needle. I hope someone's life was impacted by my talk. I hope a trajectory will be altered in some way. I hope my heart and insight landed well. I may never know for sure, but I'll trust....and have faith.

One of the adult leaders approached me afterward and said the magical line I hear more than any other: "I wish someone would have taught me this when I was 16. It would have saved me a lot of mistakes and regrets." Oh, so true! I wish I had that as well!

I have a bit of a bad news, good news situation. If you're 45 years old, I can't dump you into a DeLorean, speed up to 88 MPH, and take you back to your teenage years. It's too late. I can't go back, and you can't go back. We are where we are. Our past is our past, our mistakes are our mistakes, and our regrets are our regrets.

Now, it's time for the good news. Today is the youngest day of your life. You'll never be this young again. It's the youngest you'll ever be. Therefore, perhaps today is the day you make some changes. Pay off debt. Get on a budget. Start giving generously. Transition to the work you're called to. Start investing. Build an emergency fund. Save for that dream trip.

Here's what I don't want for you. I don't want the 85-year-old version of you to say, "I wish I would have done ____ when I was 45. I was so young then."

No, you might not be 16 anymore. Or 25. Or 30. But you are where you are, and it's the youngest you'll ever be. If that's true, you might as well get started now.

Happy youngest day of your life. Let's get started!

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Death, Taxes, and Jealousy

In yesterday's post, I talked about the prevalence and destruction of jealousy in our lives. If you have a pulse, you're either the culprit or victim of jealousy.....or both. I didn't offer any tangible takeaways in yesterday's post, partly due to my self-imposed word count limit (which I already breached the way it was) and partly because I didn't yet know where I wanted to take it.

I'm going to start with a little life hack. I can tell you with 100% certainty how to prevent people from acting like a jealous jerk around you. Ready for it? Don't do anything. Don't grow. Don't build. Don't progress. Don't thrive. Don't be productive. Staying where you are is a surefire way to prevent the jealousy bug from biting your friends, family, and co-workers.

In the absence of my brilliant little life hack, jealousy is inevitable. It's inevitable because jealousy rears its ugly head when, and only when, you surpass someone in a particular area. The woman in yesterday's post was a perfect example. She was the darling in other people's lives. They rooted for her. They encouraged her. They cheered her on. Then, she unexpectedly surpassed them. More money. More notoriety. More status. The moment she passed them, the jealousy bug bit.

Here's another sad reality. It doesn't matter how humble you are or how well you carry yourself; you cannot control the jealousy seeded in others. It is what it is, and that's what it is. If that's true, you have just one job: keep growing.

• Get out of debt.

• Improve your craft.

• Get more intentional with your finances.

• Build more stability.

• Invest in relationships.

• Pour out generosity.

• Start that new endeavor.

• Put your art into the world.

Do it all, but do it all with a posture of humility. Be above reproach in your behavior and attitude. Give people no reason to be jealous, knowing they will be anyway.

What about your own jealousy bug, though? Yeah, this part is tough. It's all fun and games when we want people to stop being jealous of us, but what should we think when someone else surpasses us? Well, we can definitely choose jealousy.....everyone else does, after all.

If I do my financial coaching job right, some of my clients will far surpass me. That's happened many times. Due to their circumstances, age, and trajectory, if they implement my ideas well, they will absolutely crush what I've accomplished. So what happens when I get a front-row seat to someone surpassing me? I feel nothing but joy for them. Why? The answer is my parting thought for the day.

Life is not a zero-sum game. Someone else winning does not mean that I'm losing. It doesn't have to be about winners and losers. Everyone can win. My friends, family, neighbors, and co-workers having good fortune or blessing in their lives does not negatively impact my life one bit. Therefore, there's no rational or loving feeling other than joy.

Feel joy for them. Take care of your own business. Repeat.

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Stacking Wins

We recently procured some office space for Northern Vessel, called NV HQ. It's not a great space, but it's our space.....and the vibe perfectly fits our personality as a brand. It will be a space for team meetings, strategy sessions, and creative workshops. It will also house our storage overflow, which has been facilitated via a few storage units. All in all, this is a massive development for us, and we're excited to have more room to be us.

I bring that up for one specific reason. When I first walked into the half-completed space, a giant mobile whiteboard was positioned against the wall. At the top were the words "Stacking Wins." I smiled, as this has become our recent motto for approaching business. As we reflected back on 2024, it was so easy to recall the crappy times:

• Getting hit by the second car in nine months.

• Closing down our canning operation (which was easily the worst business venture I've attempted in my life).

• Enduring a disastrous event that we put much time, energy, and resources into.

• Battling A/C issues at the shop during the scorching summer weeks.

• The list goes on.

It would be so easy for us to define our year by those memorable failings. However, that's only part of the story.....a very small part. As humans, we often dwell on the crap while taking the good for granted. The complete story of Northern Vessel in 2024 was a monumental win. If true, how do we combat our human nature to forget the good and dwell on the bad?

Stacking wins! As 2025 unfolds, we will use that whiteboard to document any and all wins. We're going to stack them visually for all of us to see, remember, celebrate, and embrace. We already have eight wins stacked on the board three weeks into the year. Some are small wins, and some are huge wins. Creating NV HQ is one of them!

Now, every time we feel beaten down by a recent whiff, we can look at our stacked wins and remind ourselves that we have much to be grateful for. I'll be implementing this in my personal life as well, and I invite you to do the same. Inventory your wins. Write them down. Stack them. Then, when life gets tough (because that's what life does), you can refer back to your stacked wins and realize you, too, have much to be grateful for.

2025 is the year of wins. Embrace them. Celebrate them. Remember them. Stack them.

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You Are Where You Are, And So Are They

Yesterday was a weird day in southern Mississippi. Due to the nasty storm heading in (snowy and cold), everything shut down. No school, businesses closed, and we had to shut down the dry ice factory because our CO2 supplier couldn't make deliveries. The world came to a screeching halt. I spent the day working from my hotel's lobby. 

For lunch, I walked across the street and enjoyed Cracker Barrel. I was the only one there, and my waitress was appalled they were even open. At dinner, I walked from restaurant to restaurant, greeted by each with a closed sign or drive-thru only sign. Even Wal-Mart was closed (Wal-Mart was closed!!!!). I eventually found refuge in a nearby Waffle House where the other patrons shared stories of today's "once-in-a lifetime" event. 

Wanna see what brought southern Mississippi to its knees?

Oh yeah, and the temp fell to 25 degrees. This isn't me poking fun at them; far from it. Many people I talked to said they hadn't seen snow in 15 years. Some grown adults had never seen snow until yesterday. Here's where I'm going with this. We are where we are. I am where I am. You are where you are. Regardless of what anyone thinks of it, it's the current reality. Southern Mississippi doesn't have the equipment, experience, infrastructure, or culture for this type of weather. On the flip side, I talked to my wife about how the wind chills at home were -25 degrees (NEGATIVE 25 degrees), and we wondered if the kids would have outdoor recess. However, my friend Kevin from northern Minnesota said it was -50 wind chill at his house, making our -25 feel like spring to him. It's all about context. We are where we are.

So many people like to cast judgment and condemnation on other people for their financial failings, shouting down at them to just do it right. Others, on the opposite end of the spectrum, feel defeated by finances. Money hasn't been their strong suit, and they have the scars and regrets to prove it. 

We are where we are. The goal shouldn't be to magically become perfect, nor expect people around you to be. Rather, we should get a little bit better this week, then do it again next week. Develop one new skill. Improve one habit. Create one strengthening process. If we think we should (and can) wave a magic wand and drastically improve all the aspects of getting our money right, we'll be sorely disappointed. But if we view it as an iterative process, a journey, we will absolutely get to a better place.

We are where we are…..today. Next week, next month, and next year we'll be somewhere else. And if we do the hard work, it'll be a better place. 

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Seriously, how is Wal-Mart closed?!?!

What Gets Measured, Part 2

Last week, I published a piece about the importance of measuring the things we want to accomplish. After all, "what gets measured gets done." I framed the post through the lens of my newfound discovery that I walk far less than I thought. So, when my wife purchased a walking pad, I decided to do something about it.

In the world of "what gets measured gets done," how we measure is where the rubber meets the road. If we can't find a simple and effective way to measure, we won't. And if we won't, ____ doesn't get accomplished. This is a crucial concept I discuss with my coaching clients. It's imperative to find easy ways to measure what needs to be measured. Anything else will result in inevitable failure.

In the case of my walking, I luckily have a world-class tool at my fingertips. In fact, we all do. The built-in Health app on the iPhone is an amazingly simple and powerful tool for measuring many different aspects of our lives. It's a bit scary, but this app has measured my walking for the better part of a decade. I can see the data in black and white.

Given how well the data is measured, it's created more clarity and motivation for me. I consciously think about my walking now. Instead of being completely passive and out of mind, it's at the forefront. This has resulted in some interesting (and intentional) behaviors:

• While waiting for my flight on Saturday afternoon, I paced back and forth through the terminal while on a Northern Vessel call with TJ.

• Knowing I'd be sitting behind a desk all day on Sunday, I got a few thousand steps on the hotel treadmill early in the morning.

• Since I did, in fact, sit behind a desk all day and didn't get to my new hotel until 10:30 PM that night, I still needed to rip out another 3,000 steps before bed. Unfortunately, the hotel's treadmill was broken. I improvised, pacing the hotel like a creepy stalker while talking to a friend on the phone.

What gets measured gets done! Want to see what that looks like for this silly little endeavor?

Boom! I went from 3,000 steps per day to 12,000 practically overnight. Part of why I've been preliminarily successful is the tool's strength. Look how clean and visual the data is. I'd be lying if I said it wasn't making a difference.

Finances are the same way. We need simple yet powerful tools. If you're looking to budget, EveryDollar Premium is hands down the best budgeting app on the market. I'm not Dave Ramsey fan (to put it lightly), but truth is truth. They created an ingenious tool, and it's 100% worth checking out. It must be the paid version, though. The free version, requiring manual entry, is brutal to use. This tool changes lives.

CapitalOne's 360 Performance Savings accounts are a fantastic tool to facilitate and track sinking funds.

CashApp is easily the best tool to house a single spending category, like personal spending, groceries, or dining out.

What gets measured gets done, and the right tools can be the make or break. What tools add value to your finances?

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But Not Yet

I was chatting with a close friend yesterday while I waited for my flight to take off. It was an innocent chat, but then, out of nowhere, my friend shared something I instantly knew would be today’s post. He was discussing a mutual friend. Our mutual friend is a fantastic guy with a heart of gold and excellent at his craft. He’s most certainly on a path to success in his professional and personal endeavors. The conversation revolved around how our common friend has a ton of big, awesome goals. One problem: He wants to achieve them all right now. Unfortunately, his urgency, impatience, and lack of focus will completely sabotage most, if not all, of these big goals. My friend on the other end of the phone concluded this little gem: “We can have almost anything we want in life, but not yet.” 

Short, punchy, profound, and so very true! Almost everything in life is possible, but not if we try to take shortcuts to get there….and not if we try to do them all at once. I’ll share a few real-life examples.

The first is one of my friends from college. He’s a smart dude with a healthy motor. Coming out of college, he believed he deserved to quickly achieve xyz title in his industry. Why? Because he was better than most people, and he deserved it. While I was 100% confident he could (and would) eventually get there, his approach and mindset concerned me. I encouraged him to simply do the work, pay his dues, and methodically work his way to where he wanted to be. He could get exactly what he was looking for, but not yet. Nope. He wanted what he wanted, and he wanted it now. In his pursuit of quick status (and the money that would accompany it), he frequently job-hopped, burned bridges, and greedily played the ladder-climbing game. Fast forward 20 years, and his career plateaued far lower than his original vision. So sad…..and so avoidable.

My second example is a friend with several simultaneous and conflicting wants. On one hand, he desperately wants to change careers and pursue work that matters. He also wants to buy a house. He also wants to upgrade his car. All three of these aspirations are possible, but not yet. If he prioritized them and focused on one at a time, he could achieve all three. However, in his impatience and haste, he’s creating a scenario where he’ll have none of them. I hope he alters his path, but I foresee a brutal end to this hasty endeavor. So sad…..and so avoidable. 

We can have almost anything we want in life, but not yet. We need to focus on what’s most important, have discipline, stay persistent, and be patient. When we do those things, we’ll absolutely get to where we’re trying to go.

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