Alternatives

My son Pax has been dead set on buying a pair of $125 Oakley sunglasses. I've been careful not to poop on his aspirations, but I've secretly been hoping he would eventually change his mind. $125 for a pair of sunglasses is a lot for an adult, never mind a third grader. The good news is that it takes a 9-year-old a long time to save up $125. As of this weekend, he was sitting on about $102.....close but not close enough.

Without explicitly saying it, I think he's been feeling the weight of this prospective purchase. He's experiencing just how much work is involved in saving for a single pair of $125 sunglasses. Then, yesterday happened. As we walked through Dick's Sporting Goods, he caught sight of a cool pair of sunglasses. He beelined it to the display and hurried to try on a few pairs.

Just a few minutes later, he decided to pull the trigger. $45. Just like that, he had an awesome pair of sunglasses he loved, plus $57 of cash leftover from his sunglasses fund. He found the perfect alternative, and it beautifully propelled him forward.

Not the style I would have chosen, but he loves them!

This is such an important topic for each of us to confront. Often, we get locked into a particular plan. We concede that something will cost a certain amount of money, time, energy, or sacrifice. For whatever reason, we develop tunnel vision and build our reality around this way being the absolute unyielding truth.

What are the alternatives, though? I recently met with a couple who are having brutal car issues. Their current vehicle is starting to absorb large chunks of repair money. What should they do? In their minds, there is only one option: purchase a new vehicle, which will cost between $55,000-$65,000. That's it. That's their fate.

What about alternatives? There are no alternatives, they exclaimed! Continue eating big repair bills, or buy a new car. In their situation, said new car would require a huge loan with a huge monthly payment. Oh well, they thought, it's their new reality. Tunnel vision set in.

It took a few conversations, but fortunately, they started to see some alternatives taking shape. After a few months had passed, they elected to purchase a reliable used vehicle that a) eliminates the repair issues they were dealing with, and b) avoids the painful cost of the debt that a new vehicle would surely create. They had the same look on their faces as Pax had yesterday when he purchased his alternative sunglasses: Relief, contentment, and peace.

Life is filled with alternatives.....if we're willing to look. When I look back at my adult life, some of the best purchases and decisions I've made were actually alternatives to the primary plan I set for myself. Whether knowingly or unknowingly, my eyes were opened to a better, more effective alternative. Each time that happens, I could feel my life propel forward. Relief, contentment, peace.

Always look for the alternatives.

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You Don’t Have to Play Their Game

One of my favorite subgenres on social media is the one where people whine and cry about how much businesses rip them off. Chipotle is probably my favorite. A jacked dude is sitting in his car, saucing up the fat burrito he just purchased. As he's preparing to take his first bite, he's complaining about how it's absurd that two burritos cost $37. Chipotle never used to cost this much, he exclaims. It's highway robbery! He takes a giant bite into his juicy burrito, then complains some more.

Chipotle, Five Guys, Disney World, new cars, airport restaurants, drinks in clubs, Ticketmaster, etc. There's no end to the complaining people do for decisions they voluntarily and willingly make.

One of my friends was recently lamenting the fees charged by Ticketmaster. He goes on and on and on about it. "Did you enjoy the show?" I asked. "Yeah, it was amazing!!!" "Would you do it again?" "Yeah, in a heartbeat." So, what's the problem?

Here's a little encouragement. You don't have to play their game. If you don't like the price of Chipotle, don't go. Simple as that. If it's really that big of a ripoff, then don't go. Go to one of the hundreds of dining alternatives. But if you're still going to go, own it. If you're willingly going to pay $18 for a fast-food burrito, embrace it. Enjoy it; savor it. Don't whine about it.

This is a wild part of behavioral science that I'm increasingly fascinated by. In a world where we have near-unlimited choices, we're intentionally (and repeatedly) choosing to go to XYZ businesses, then continuously whining about how big a ripoff they are. It's bonkers!

You don't have to play their game. If I think somewhere is a ripoff, I don't go. If I think something is a ripoff, I don't buy it. In the event I do willingly purchase something that's questionably a ripoff, I own it. I made that choice. There was no gun to my head. We look awfully ridiculous when we make a choice to do something, then become a victim of said choice.

If you want to slam that burrito, slam that burrito. If you want to avoid that place, avoid that place. In the words of a wise mentor, "Let your yes be yes, and your no be no."

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Someone Else’s Dream

Do you ever find yourself wishing to be in someone else's shoes? Sure, life is fine, but if only I had that person's life! I can think of so many times these sorts of thoughts have gone through my head. I think about my friend in Dubai who parks his Lamborghini in his kitchen (professionally washed and waxed each night, of course). Or my former colleague in Los Angeles County who hates Los LA traffic so much that whenever we left his house, it was via his private rooftop helipad. Or my friends who, when we go to a restaurant together, don't even look at the right side of the menu!

It's so easy to look at our own life, then look at someone else's, and wish we could step into their shoes. There's no shortage of jealousy in this world, and it doesn't take much to ignite it in us, does it?

Last night, while in a coaching meeting, one of my clients said something that stopped me in my tracks. We were talking about the sacrifices this couple has made over the years to get them to where they are today. It hasn't been easy, but it was oh so worth it. Then, she dropped this bomb:

"We are living someone else's dream."

Read that again. She is living someone else's dream. I'm living someone else's dream. You're living someone else's dream. Regardless of where we're at in life, we're living someone else's dream. By definition, that means we're blessed.

I can meet with a couple who says, "Our lives would be so much better if we could get there!"

Then during my next meeting, I'll be with a couple who is already there. "Our lives would be so much better if we could get THERE!"

Then during my next meeting, I'll be with a couple who is already THERE. "Our lives would be so much better if we could get THERE!!!!!!!!!"

See, each one of these couples is already living someone else's dream, but at the same time, they take it for granted because they just want to get to that next rung on the proverbial ladder.

You're living someone else's dream. I encourage you to spend a few minutes pondering that idea today.

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Focus, In Practice

Crush one thing, then move on to the next. That was the subject of yesterday's post. Focus is a weird thing, and often difficult for us humans to execute. After all, there are many things vying for our time, attention, energy, and resources. However, whether we like it or not, there's simply not enough time, attention, energy, or resources to attack everything.

Today, I want to share some real-life examples of how this concept works through the lens of personal finance. The most common and notable version of this concept I see people shortchanging themselves is debt. Specifically, the payoff of debt. When we try to pay all our debts off at once, we'll likely pay none of them off.

Here's an example of what this looks like, using some nice round numbers for simplicity's sake. A family has ten $1,000 debts, totaling $10,000. This couple determines that it can afford to pay $1,000/month extra toward the debt (above the minimum payments).

Conventional wisdom says that if they pay $100/month toward each debt, they can have their debt paid off after 10 months! That's exciting!!! Here's what that looks like in practice, though:

• After 1 month: 0 debts paid off

• After 2 months: 0 debts paid off

• After 3 months: 0 debts paid off

• After 4 months: 0 debts paid off

• After 5 months: 0 debts paid off

• After 6 months: 0 debts paid off

• After 7 months: 0 debts paid off

• After 8 months: 0 debts paid off

• After 9 months: 0 debts paid off

• After 10 months (if everything went perfectly): 10 debts paid off

The gap between month zero and month 10 feels massive. Grinding month after month after month without feeling a tangible win is terrible. Inevitably, life happens, expenses pop up, or they get sidetracked. Failure is likely. Not because they didn't have it in them, but because they lacked focus. Discouragement sets in. A sense of defeat saturates them. Quitting is on the table.

Let's try this again, but with focus as the primary objective. Instead of paying $100/month toward 10 different debts, they decide to focus all $1,000/month on one debt each month. Here's what that strategy looks like:

• After 1 month: 1 debt paid off

• After 2 months: 2 debts paid off

• After 3 months: 3 debts paid off

• After 4 months: 4 debts paid off

• After 5 months: 5 debts paid off

• After 6 months: 6 debts paid off

• After 7 months: 7 debts paid off

• After 8 months: 8 debts paid off

• After 9 months: 9 debts paid off

• After 10 months: 10 debts paid off

Will life still get in the way? Probably. However, look at those wins! Almost immediately, this family would experience and benefit from wins. From a psychological perspective, wins matter. Getting a win provides much-needed encouragement, confidence, and motivation to not only keep going, but even step on the gas harder.

This one small shift in perspective can be the difference between complete failure and world domination. Same dollars, same timeline, same commitment. Different focus, different results.

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Crush One Before Another

Our Northern Vessel ownership team recently decided that I need to take on a larger role within the company. I was already active behind the scenes and had a part-time, finance and operations role for the last 15 months. However, as the business grows and evolves, we need more of many things. After much convincing from TJ (our founder), I agreed to step in deeper.

Younger me would have thought the best course of action was the full implementation of all the great ideas on day one. Full bore, 100% force on everything from the get-go. However, after much experience (and the harshest of hard lessons), I've wisely learned that's a terrible approach. Instead, my best advice to the team (and to TJ) is to ease our way into the first initiative.

In our particular situation, given the sheer number of people we serve each day, inventory management is critical. However, we purchase hundreds of different items for our shop. Old me would have attempted to gain control of each of these products at the same time.....ouch. What's about the transpire is a staging. First, the big rocks of our business: coffee beans, milk, and serving containers (cups/cans/bottles). These three items are critical to our operation, and failure to manage these well will result in product outages, waste, warehouse storage shortages, or destructive margins, all of which are harmful to the business.

Dozens of initiatives need to be completed, yet we're focusing 100% of our attention on getting better control of coffee, milk, and containers. That's it. If done well, just that will have a transformative impact on the business. Once we gain traction, we'll take the newly learned best practices and incorporate our other inventory items. Then, once that's knocked out, we'll move on to another important initiative.

No, the entire point of this piece isn't to wax about coffee inputs. We need to focus! I often meet with clients who think the best idea is to implement every idea from the start. Many of my coaching concepts are counter-cultural in and of themselves, so trying to completely shift how we're viewing and handling finances in every single way, all at once, is a wildly terrible idea.

This month, we'll incorporate this. If successful, we'll add something next month. If all continues smoothly, we'll add the next piece. Before long, ten new ideas have been successfully implemented. On the flip side, if we try to implement all ten of these ideas right away, we might strike out completely.

Make one change today. Just one. Commit to it. Give yourself grace, but keep at it. AFTER you've locked it in, add another. Repeat. This applies to personal finances, for sure, but also to so many other areas of our lives.

To be continued....

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Simplify, Simplify, Simplify

One of the biggest myths in the personal finance space is the idea that in order to be financially successful, one must have sophisticated or complex finances. In most cases, the opposite is true. Simple wins.

I recently sat down with a couple to help them understand their financial structure. However, it took me a while to understand it before I could even help them understand it. Money was coming and going every which way, and they had bank accounts coming out of their ears. They practically needed a treasure map to adequately interpret the lay of the land.

When I explained to this couple how I structure my personal finances and how I coach other families to do it, they looked shocked. How in the world can it be that simple?!?! After having a similar conversation with two more people yesterday, I thought I'd share it with a wider audience. Want to know just how simple this can be? I'll show you the base structure for day-to-day finances that works fantastically for most couples:

• ONE Joint Checking Account. This is the account to which all income flows in, and all expenses flow out. Each person has a debit card tied to this checking account.

• ONE Emergency Fund. This is a savings account tied to the above checking account. The purpose of this money is to save us in the event of an emergency. It may not earn much interest, but the money can be accessed at a moment's notice, when life punches.

• Sinking Funds. A few named savings accounts are used to save for specific categories. Car, house, travel, and medical are common categories. These are future expenditures that cannot always be absorbed via the monthly budget (such as the $1,600 car repair bill I experienced yesterday). Sinking funds can be housed at the same institution as the two accounts above, but they don't have to be.

That's it. Seriously, if all you have are those accounts, you're positioned to be more successful than 90% of people out there. It's the introduction of credit cards, multiple checking accounts, and random, unpurposeful savings accounts that complicate things. In my professional experience, every layer of complexity that gets stripped away brings people closer to their money.....and ultimately, their goals.

I suspect I'll take some heat for this one, but after working with hundreds of families and diving into the behavioral science of these concepts, I'll die on this hill. Simplify, simplify, simplify. There's no way to outsmart simple. When we spend less time thinking about what goes where and more time on trying to live a meaningful life, the finances become the easiest thing in the world.

You don't have to fully buy into this idea, but I challenge you to simplify one thing in your finances this month. If it makes your life better or easier, simplify one more next month. Repeat. I don't think you'll regret it.

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Don’t Wait

One of our close friends has been sick. Due to life's many circumstances, we haven't seen them much in the past year. Then, as a result of my neck/cognitive injury, it felt like two months of my life were stripped away from me. Recently, while I was out of state for work, I learned that my friend's condition had worsened. I was excited to connect with my friend upon my return.

Yesterday's plan was to spend time with my kids at Northern Vessel, then text my friend to see if we could come visit later in the day. However, while sitting with my kids at NV, I was stunned by the news that my friend had passed away. I sat there, stunned. Sarah broke out in tears. I tried to keep my composure for the kids, but the truth is, I felt broken.

It's well-documented on this blog over the years that I have one specific fear in life: regret. Above all other things, I fear regret. I'm not sure there's any other way to say this, but I'm probably going to take this regret to the grave with me. This one feels soul-crushing.

Yes, life happens. Yes, tragedy lurks around every corner. Yes, circumstances in and around our lives make things complicated. Yes, we're all too busy. All that is true, but don't wait. Never wait. I waited. I waited too long. I will forever carry that one with me.

Despite the gut-wrenching regret I feel, a new season is upon us. Self-loathing won't cut it. A pity party does no good. I have a friend who just lost the love of her life. My prayer is that she is loved and cared for, and that I can be the friend she deserves.

There is much to say about my friend and the legacy he leaves behind, but that shall wait for a future, more celebratory post. He lived a beautiful, God-honoring life, and while I wish I had said goodbye face-to-face, I hope he knows just how much he impacted me over these past 15 years.

Don't wait. Please don't wait.

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The Minions Learned the Hard Way

Like every spring, the tornadoes are upon us here in the Midwest. When the crazy storms hit the other night, and the kids experienced their predictable freak-out, we gathered in the basement to ease their fears. I took advantage of that time by snuggling with them in the guest bedroom and watching a movie on the portable projector: Minions!

I hadn't seen that movie in ages, and as expected, it was silly. Something stood out to me, though. In the opening scene, the Minions bounced from serving one evil entity to the next. From the T-Rex, to ancient Egypt, to Napoleon. Then, while between evil masters, they found refuge in this little utopic ice den. They created a sanctuary for themselves, built beautiful shelters, and lived their lives in comfort and safety.

Then, something happened. They got depressed. Too much of a good thing became a very not good thing. Endless fun, games, relaxation, and safety lost their luster, and they literally became depressed. The narrator stated, "Without a master, they had no purpose." In their world, a master represented a boss, and through the boss, they had work. Without work, they had no purpose. They didn't need money. It wasn't a necessary evil (no pun intended). Work wasn't a means to an end. The work, in and of itself, was the meaning.

I think this is such a beautiful metaphor for what we talk about on this blog and on the podcast. Work has meaning; it matters. We weren't created to be idle, living our little lives of leisure. We were created to be productive, add value, and pursue purpose. Sure, we're probably not all called to serve evil villains, but we're called to serve someone. We're probably not called to steal the British Royal Family's Crown Jewels, but we are called to be productive in some other ways.

Leisure is great, in doses. Comfort is great, in doses. Relaxation is great, in doses. All of these things are tremendously valuable, and equally important......in doses. However, when they become THE pillars of our lives, we lose meaning and purpose.

The Minions learned the hard way, but luckily, we don't have to. Meaning and purpose can take a million different shapes, but I guarantee it looks different than the endless pursuit of leisure, comfort, and relaxation.

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To What End?

I wrote two other pieces this morning, neither of which may ever see the light of day. Ultimately, they seemed a little too spicy. While I'm not opposed to pushing a little harder and risking a mini wave of unsubscribes, I always try to ask myself an important question: "To what end?"

We live in a culture that tells us to say anything and everything we want. Say it like it is. Be honest, even if it hurts. Say what needs to be said. Stand up for what you believe in. Draw a line in the sand. We've taken those sentiments and ratcheted them to an entirely new level. We'll verbally bludgeon someone into the dirt if we disagree with their opinion about Taco Bell's newest menu item! There's no limit to the amount of spouting off we do these days. But to what end?

Yes, I like to challenge people. Yes, I regularly push against our culture. Yes, I'm constantly trying to bend the needle for what we consider normal. However, it doesn't do any good for me (or anyone!) to just spout off with any and every comment imaginable.

Here's a rhetorical question. How many people do you think have completely changed their minds about a topic after seeing a loved one write a long, scathing social media post about how terrible someone or something else is? Very few, I'd suspect. Why, then, are we all so quick to burn all the bridges in the name of "standing up for what we believe in?"

Yes, we should stand up for what we believe in. There are some versions of that taking shape every day when I write this blog and record the podcast. But just lighting a torch on people isn't an effective approach. Sure, it might feel good for a few hours, but then we have to clean up the pieces from the damage we caused. Or, in some situations, mourn the loss of relationships, influence, and impact.

To what end? For me, this is a critical question to answer each day. I so badly want to bend the needle in people's lives and constantly push back against our prevailing culture. There's a dignified (effective) way, and a gross (tremendously ineffective) way.

I hope I continue earning the right each day to challenge you and make you think. You might not always agree with me (and that's okay!), but I hope you see a sincerity and dignity in my approach. I don't always get that part right, but I sure try. I hope you do the same. People need your relationships, influence, and impact. Please don't throw it away or burn it to the ground. It's not worth losing all that trust and goodwill for a few moments of dopamine-inducing, anger-filled rantings.

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Reminder

I gotta admit, I rarely feel like I have this whole life thing figured out. I wake up, try to make whatever impact I can, squeeze every ounce of meaning out of the moment I can, then repeat. I live an amazing life, and I'm grateful for every single bit of it, but I sometimes go to bed wondering if I actually moved the needle today.

Finn, one of my third graders, has a dress-up day today with the following theme: "Who or what you want to be when you grow up." What do you think he chose? A firefighter? A "mowin' man"? A professional athlete? Nope, he's dressing as me. He’s going to school dressed as his Dad! Wow, just wow! That pulled on the heartstrings, for sure! What does dressing up as Dad entail? Well, according to Sarah, he's wearing a Northern Vessel hat, a shacket, casual boots, and a Chicago Bears shirt. Not bad!!!

I still don't know what impact I've made recently, but Finn really put me in my place there. It's a reminder that while I'm out there in the world trying to move the needle in people's lives, I'm still investing in those two little lives at home, too. And oddly enough, it's working!

I'm not sure if Finn will try to accessorize with a podcast mic or a cold brew latte in hand, but it will be interesting to find out! I'll try to share a pic one of these days. In the meantime, don't miss those little reminders that you are, in fact, moving the needle in people's lives.....especially those living under your roof. Wake up, make a difference, find meaning, repeat. Enjoy!

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Ridiculous or Not

One of my friends caught wind of something "ridiculous" my wife spent money on. I'm not sure whether he heard it from his wife or from me, but he's right: Sarah's purchase did fall into my definition of "ridiculous."

"Why would you let her spend money on x thing that you don't even agree with? I would have just said no."

Are any spouses seething yet? Good, let the anger soak in for a moment.

Here was my two-fold response:

First, I don't "let" her do anything. Our financial decisions are joint, and she has just as much say as I do. I don't give her an allowance like a child. She negotiates for what she believes is important when we construct our monthly budget.

Which brings me to my second point. If it's important to her, it's important to me......period. Even if I think something is ridiculous (and I often do with Sarah!), that doesn't matter. If it moves the needle for her, I must support her in that. Therefore, when it's important to her, it's important to me. Something fun happens when we take that posture: It gets reciprocated. I promise I spend money on things that Sarah thinks are absolutely ridiculous, too. But just like me, she supports my ridiculousness because it's important to me.

Yes, we should have financial unity in marriage. I'll 100% die on that hill. It's critical to a successful marriage and to successful household finances. That doesn't mean both spouses will value every expenditure equally. Some expenditures will be more your thing, and others will be more your partner's thing. That's okay! That's what makes you a team, and that's what it looks like to sacrifice for each other.

So, yes, I suspect Sarah will continue to desire "ridiculous" purchases. I'll support her every step of the way. If it's important to her, it's important to me.

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The Tale of Two Neighbors

I'm good friends with two people, but I don't think either of them knows I'm friends with the other. These two individuals are both business owners, and as luck would have it, their retail locations are adjacent to one another. They share a wall!

During one of our recent conversations, one of these friends was expressing excitement about how amazing business has been lately. The business is hitting record numbers and has new customers coming out of their ears. 2025 was the most profitable year ever, and by the looks of the first two months of 2026, this year will crush those records. Every conversation revolves around their team culture and its customer experience.

During a recent conversation with the other friend, the theme of the conversation revolved around the idea that nobody supports small businesses anymore. Everyone just wants to eat at chain restaurants, shop at big-box stores, and order their goods from Amazon. In other words, people suck, and the stupid actions of these sucky people are driving all small businesses into the ground. Closure seems imminent, which I suppose is the natural outcome when people stop "supporting local." It's always a pity party, and this person (and their business) is always the victim of the situation.

You'd think these businesses are located on different planets, but remember, they share a wall! Same street, same foot traffic, same weather patterns, same landlord, same everything. One thing sets them apart, though. The first business is laser-focused on being excellent, offering a fantastic product, practicing unreasonable hospitality, and serving those whom they have the privilege of serving. They have a posture of gratitude and constantly have their foot on the gas.

The second business operates with a sense of entitlement, constantly asking people to come support them. They don't operate with excellence, and the staff treats people poorly. They don't have a keen sense of the numbers and are always looking for a novelty idea to get people in the door. Further, they are known to spout off about political topics.....which is likely driving away 50% of their prospective customers.

It's never really about "supporting" small business or not. People naturally gravitate toward excellence.....period. People are largely agnostic about big vs. small, national vs. local. If anything, I'd say people naturally bend toward small and local, but said small and local businesses must earn it through excellence.

Whatever you're doing today, whether you run a business or not, focus on excellence. Excellence always wins....always. Yes, there are many forces and factors at play. There's no doubt that externalities play a role in our lives, finances, careers, and businesses. However, at the same time, we must control what we can control. And today, we can control our pursuit of excellence.

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Don’t Forget to Look Down

I was recently working on a project for a client when one of the senior executives blurted out, "I can't believe you know how to do that. That's insane!"

"Well, I didn't know how to do this a year ago."

He laughed. I wasn't kidding. The truth is, some of the things I'm working on today are miles above what I could accomplish just one year ago. Think about that! At 44, much of my work involves skills that 43-year-old me had zero chance of executing......never mind 33-year-old me!

It's moments like this that remind me how important it is we look down. We're often so busy climbing this proverbial mountain of growth that we lose sight of just how far we've come. Sometimes, we need to take a little peek down the mountain to jar ourselves back to reality of just how far we've actually come.

In a world that consistently tells us we're not good enough and encourages us to unfairly compare ourselves to others, perhaps we need to start (fairly) comparing ourselves to where we've come from. I don't want to be the next xyz. I want to be the best me I can be. Therefore, instead of comparing myself to someone else, I need to compare myself to where I've come from.

Am I more skilled at x than I used to be?

Am I wiser than I used to be?

Am I a better decision-maker than I used to be?

Is my emotional intelligence better than it used to be?

Are my blog posts and podcast episodes sharper than when I first began?

Am I more effective in my coaching than I was in the past?

Are my speaking skills better honed than in my earlier talks?

These should be the measuring sticks I use to assess myself, not some celebrity version of what I do on social media. As for you, you need to create your own measuring sticks. You need to look down that proverbial mountain and see just how dang far you've come. Go ahead, take a peek. Be honest with yourself. How far have you come in the past year? 5 years? What about 10 years!?!?

Great, now just imagine how cool and awesome it's going to be 10 years from now! That version of you is really going to move the needle. Keep moving forward.

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(Un)Limited Digital Footprint

A few days ago, one of my buddies made a declaration to me that caught me somewhat offguard. What seemed out of nowhere, he definitively said, "I'm trying to leave a limited digital footprint." The heart of his message was that he is trying to stay relatively off the radar, with the intended goal of having as little about him as possible findable on the internet.

I have old high school friends with ZERO digital footprint. Seriously. I was trying to find a few people recently, and to my shock, they were digital ghosts. How is that even possible?!?!

Everyone can navigate this digital footprint however they choose, but today, I want to share my perspective. Here's how I responded when my buddy said he wanted to leave a limited digital footprint. "I'm trying to leave an UNlimited digital footprint!" I laughed. He laughed. We laughed.

Seriously, though, I mean it. I want to leave the largest digital footprint possible. Perhaps we need to define the term "digital footprint." The entire concept has morphed over the years.

In 2008, a digital footprint looked something like this on Facebook: "Travis Shelton is taking a poop and hitting the gym. It's gonna be a great day!" Yes, very insightful!

Over time, we got more serious (and gross) about this whole digital footprint idea. Here's what it looks like in 2026. "Trump is evil!" or "I love Trump!"

Again, very compelling! To most people, this is what a digital footprint consists of. It's a collection of random thoughts, gut reactions, and potshots. This is not what I'm talking about when referring to my aspiration for an "unlimited digital footprint."

Instead, what I'm shooting for, and advocating others similarly pursue, is a tangible legacy that will linger long after we're gone. Photos, video, wisdom, art, and impact. That can take many different forms, but the results are similar. When we're no longer here, we're creating the opportunity to continue making a difference in other people's lives. It's a simple, but profound idea.

My family recently watched the new Twenty One Pilots movie, More Than We Ever Imagined, at the theater. I was blown away. It touched me at a very deep level, and I've been thinking about it ever since. But I keep thinking about this concept of a digital footprint. If bandmates Tyler or Josh were to pass away today, this gem would remain with us forever. This film is a masterpiece representation of their brilliance and craft. They spent their time, energy, resources, and creativity to put it together, then shipped it to the world to enjoy. It’s here permanently….forever.

To me, this is a perfect representation of this idea of leaving an unlimited digital footprint. If I get hit by a bus today, I will leave a massive digital footprint. Not some ridiculous political potshots that will be loved by half and hated by half, but sincere, authentic, (hopefully) value-add content that will make a difference in other people's lives for years to come. Will it make an impact? Hard to say, but the opportunity is there. That’s all I’m asking for.

I hope everyone takes advantage of this same opportunity. Those who come after you deserve to maintain a piece of you after you're gone. What a gift!

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Allergic to Numbers

Allergies are common in today's society. Some people are allergic to food. Some people are allergic to pollen. Some people are allergic to medications. My wife, Sarah, is allergic to numbers. Strange, I know! If it involves numbers, counting, dollars, or math, she's out. She's been this way since the day I met her, and I suspect will be the same until the day she dies.

Yesterday, I received the following text from her:

That's right. Numbers. Math. Dollars. This text was her first communication for the negotiation of March's budget. Each month, for the last 200 months, Sarah and I have negotiated a budget for our household. Yes, she's allergic to numbers, but that doesn't exclude her from the process. Yes, I make 99% of our family's income, but that doesn't exclude her from the process. Yes, I'm a professional in this area, but that doesn't exclude her from the process.

I create a draft budget, she reviews it, she provides initial feedback, and then we negotiate. Once the budget is final, we both commit to honoring said budget until the completion of the month. Then, we do it again next month. This is what a team looks like. We each have roles in the process, but we both must be accountable and engaged.

One of my clients recently said they have no idea how they even lived their lives before budgeting became a fixture in their marriage. That resonated with me. If it weren't for Sarah and I's discipline in this area of our lives, there's zero chance we'd be anywhere close to where we are now. Frankly, I'm not sure we'd even have a marriage. The tension that finances have on marriages is massive. In fact, financial tension is the number one cause of divorce in America. That's wild....and sad! My running joke (not joke) with clients is that "Sarah and I have enough issues that we can't afford money to be one of them."

How long does it take me to create the first draft of the budget? Probably 10 minutes. How long does it take for Sarah and me to negotiate the final budget? Probably another 10 minutes. How long does it take me to track our budget each month? Probably 30-40 total minutes throughout the month. Therefore, approximately 60 minutes per month is the difference between living in constant tension, friction, and unknown vs. watching all our dreams come true, with unity.

It's a small price to pay for unquestionable, uncapped upside.

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An Open Postcard, Revisited

During a recent speaking event, someone in the audience asked me, "What's your origin story?" Such an intriguing question! Mere hours after that talk, I received one of those Facebook notifications about past posts "on this day." This particular post caught my eye. It was a blog post I published six years prior. In fact, it was one of the first things I ever published on my website, nearly three years before The Daily Meaning was born.

As I read that post last night, it seemed, in and of itself, the heart of my origin story. It was framed through the lens of a postcard I wrote to my then-toddler kids on the eve of resigning from my 15-year career and starting over. I was scared, excited, and queasy.....did I mention scared?!?!

As I re-read the words I wrote to my kids all those years ago, I don't think I would change a thing. I encourage you to read it, and I hope those scared words add value to you today just as I hope they someday add value to my grown kids. You can find it HERE.

Have a great day!

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Master Mechanic

I was talking to one of our Northern Vessel baristas yesterday morning when the topic of income taxes on tips came up. I gave her a short answer, then added, "But you should definitely ask your tax professional about this."

Her: ............

Me: "You don't have a trusted tax professional?"

Her: "No, I just do my own taxes. I always have."

Me: "Why don't you have someone you trust?"

Her: "I don't want to throw away $300 for something I can just do myself."

Me: "Would you swap out the engine in your car yourself to save a few hundred bucks?"

Her (tongue in cheek): "Of course!"

This is a hot take, and one I share often, but I don't believe any American should be doing their own taxes. Unless we have professional experience as a tax accountant, I think every single person should have a trusted tax professional in their camp.

Yes, it's going to cost some money. Let's say it costs a few hundred bucks. I would argue that you'll experience far more upside than what it costs. At worst, you have someone in your corner if/when the IRS comes knocking. At best, your trusted professional will help save you thousands of dollars on nuances you never even thought about.

To be clear, I'm not talking about walking into a brick-and-mortar tax shop in early April for 60 minutes to have someone crank out your tax return. I'm talking about a true professional that you can build a relationship with over time. Someone who is available to contact during the year when you have life changes. Someone who will help you make decisions BEFORE the year ends to best take advantage of any tax benefits. Someone who will explain changes in the tax code. Someone who can answer all your dumb questions to make this ridiculous tax code more approachable. Someone who will look out for your best interest 12 months of the year, not just on a singular day.

Sure, I could try to save a few hundred bucks by replacing the engine in my car myself. However, I'd probably end up royally screwing something up, ultimately costing me far more than it would have had I just paid an expert to help me in the first place. I'm not a master mechanic, though, and I don't play one on TV. The same goes for taxes. I'm not an expert, and I'll never claim to be. That's why I have someone I trust to walk alongside me to ensure I maximize that area of my life. Trust me, it's so worth having!

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Playing How We Practice

I once had a basketball coach say something that forever stuck with me. It happened on the heels of a horrible practice; a practice which we were goofing off, playing at half speed, and not focusing on the nuances of the sets. He came into the locker room and screamed, "We play how we practice, and if today's practice was any indication, we're about to get our a**'s kicked tomorrow night."

Ouch! Turns out, he was right. We got steamrolled by a conference rival the following day. That principle, though, has always stuck with me. The intensity at which we practice has a direct correlation with how we'll show up in the games. Michael Jordan was famous for this. He specifically engineered the Chicago Bulls' practices to be so brutal and intense that their games felt easy. Did it work? Well, they have six championship rings, suggesting it did.

This principle carries over into my financial coaching world. When I'm working with couples, I watch closely how they handle the little things. For example, one of my clients received a $2,000 tax refund. It's not a huge amount of money, but it's something with heft to it. It matters. Despite being deeply in debt and desirous to gain firmer footing, they elected to blow this cash on pure wants. This was the proverbial practice, and they sluffed off. They had an opportunity to show discipline and wisdom with a smaller sum of money.....and blew it. This informed me that they would soon make even worse decisions with larger sums of money (the proverbial game). Fast forward through the next year, and that's exactly what happened. Their behavior in practice carried over directly to their performance during the games.

I see the opposite happen, too. When I watch a couple make wise choices with the smaller things, it gives me confidence that they will make similarly wise choices with the bigger moments. Like clockwork, it happens just like that. They play how they practice, and in their personal situation, it looks like Michael Jordan out there.

The same applies to you and me. We play how we practice. Let's be wise with the smaller moments, as those same behaviors and practices will soon transcend into the bigger moments. If we treat every practice like a game, we’ll be wearing those championship rings soon enough!

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Reckless, I Guess

One of my friends recently blasted me in a one-on-one conversation. Well, not me, specifically, but some of my content. He said that I "teach reckless principles" when it comes to investing. To summarize, I regularly talk about the simplicity, power, and effectiveness of investing in broad U.S. stock market index funds (such as VTI, VTSAX, FSKAX, VOO, or SPY).

My friend believes this advice is beyond risky. In his words, I'm "gambling" my life savings away.....and telling others to gamble, too. He's not alone in this sentiment, which is why I spend a large chunk of my professional and teaching life educating people about the truths of investing.

Did you know people owned stocks while they were still riding around on horses? Yeah, the U.S. stock market has been around since before the automobile was invented. We're talking Abraham Lincoln and the Civil War. That's what kind of track record we're talking about here.

During that nearly 160-year stretch, from the late 1800s until today, the U.S. stock market has NEVER lost money over a 15-year period of time. Ever. Sure, history tells us that we could lose half of our life savings (on paper) over a five-year window. That's happened in the past (1928-1932)... so there is precedent. But never in nearly 160 years has the market lost money over a 15-year period of time. The worst 15 years of all time were from 1929-1943, when the market delivered a total 19% gain over that stretch of time (1.15% per year). Considering what was happening in the world during that stretch (two World Wars!!!!), that's a pretty remarkable outcome!

One last number. The WORST 25-year period since the late 1800s saw the stock market increase by 3.3x (4.92% per year). Think about that. The WORST 25 years ever resulted in your investments more than tripling. Most people reading this article will be alive in 25 years. Historically speaking, your WORST outcome over that stretch will be tripling whatever you have today if you simply invest in a broad, cheap U.S. stock market index. It boggles the mind to even think about, and I don't think "reckless" feels like the right word to describe it.

This post isn't investment advice, but I did want to address this topic head-on while there's so much crazy noise spouting off all around us. We don't have to be scared. We don't have to play games with our investments. We don't have to take hot stock tips from Uncle Chuck at Thanksgiving or crazy Billy at work. Chances are, they will both be broke in due time. Instead, trust history, be patient, and don't lose sleep at night. It's always been a roller coaster and always will be a roller coaster, but if history tells us one thing, the roller coaster somehow finds its way uphill in the long run.

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A Little Accountability Goes a Long Way

One of my clients was having a heck of a time. Over and over and over again, it seemed like circumstances were stackedagainst them. A misfortune here, some bad luck there. As they described it, this was a recurring theme for the entirety oftheir adult lives. Simply put, they were the victims of bad luck and unfortunate circumstances.

However, there seemed to be a continuous theme for each of these seasons of life: them. At some point, as circumstances continue to repeat themselves, we need to look in the mirror and ask ourselves if perhaps we're part of the problem. In this couple's situation, it was obvious to me (but not to them) that perhaps their decisions (or lack thereof) were fueling the madness.

At the heart and soul of the issues, there wasn't much accountability around their finances. Everything felt reactive and chaotic, shooting from the hip. You don't need to be a subject-matter expert to know that's a terrible way to approach money.

The solution? Create accountability from the rubble of chaos. To their credit, they were willing to entertain my ideas for a while. Here's how we intentionally created accountability in an arena where it had not previously existed:

• At the end of each month, they would write down the balances of all their financial accounts and debts. How much did they have, and how much did they owe? Every single month.

• Every single month, they negotiated a budget and endeavored to follow it. Not a sucky budget where they weren't allowed to spend on things they cared about, but a budget that specifically gave them margin to do what they felt was important to them.

• They got rid of the credit cards and streamlined everything to only their joint checking account. Every dollar came into that account, and every dollar left from that account. No side quests.

• Speaking of every dollar, every single dollar of income, regardless of the source, was included in the plan. Thisincluded gifts, bonuses, tax refunds, etc.

• Each month, they reviewed how they did. They were forced to inspect their mistakes and recognize their wins. They had to actually see the consequences of their decisions, for better or worse.

This actually happened seven years ago. That couple who had spent decades dealing with bad luck and misfortune has since transformed themselves into a family that seems to have a lot more good luck and positive fortune. They no longer have debt. They know exactly what's happening with the finances. They are pursuing their aspirations.....and making progress! They don't fight about money anymore. They are living such an amazing life!

This isn't a story about my coaching. This is a story about the power of taking accountability and deciding enough is enough. It's a story about redemption, second chances, and the power of discipline. It's a story about two grown adults who shed generations of financial and behavioral baggage. A little accountability goes a long way!

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