It’s Not the Job That Sucks

As a reminder, 70% of Americans dislike or hate their jobs. Pretty sad, eh? 7 out of 10 people are living somewhere between mere tolerance and absolute misery. I've talked about this countless times before, but today, I will take a different approach. Here's my hot take of the week: It's not your job that sucks.

Well, your job may or may not suck, but that's not what's driving this 70% number. There's a saying that lives rent-free in my head: "People don't leave bad jobs; they leave bad leaders."

The data is beginning to show that people who have a terrible job but a great leader surprisingly experience more enjoyment, meaning, and fulfillment in their work than people who have a great job but a terrible leader.

My own life experience affirms this. When I was in high school, I worked at a cheese factory. No, not a Cheesecake Factory. A literal cheese factory. Unsurprisingly, being 17 years old and waking up at 4AM every Sunday to package cheese is a terrible job. It was cold, boring, and monotonous. However, I enjoyed that job! Why? Because my leaders were really good. They breathed life into the work, and the culture thrived.

Conversely, many years later, I had one of the coolest jobs ever. I won't share too many details about it, as I don't want what I'm about to say to land on a specific person. But let's just say the job was really freaking cool! However, my leader wasn't so great. Their attitude, coldness, self-serving priorities, treatment of others, seeming unwillingness to hold people accountable, and overall lack of respect created an environment where neither I nor others found enjoyment, meaning, or fulfillment. They sucked the life out of the work, and the culture suffered.

I have two takeaways today. First, if you're one of the 70% of Americans who dislike or hate their job, it means you might be one good leader away from joining the 30% club. Perhaps that means an intentional shift within your current organization, a similar job at a different organization, or some other lateral but small move would suffice. It doesn't mean you must blow up your entire life like I did. You don't have to make a drastic 180-degree turn to find meaning in your work. This should be fantastic news! Congratulations, one small tweak might be the difference between misery and meaning. Between tolerance and fulfillment. Between dread and excitement.

Here's my second takeaway. Many of you are leaders in your organizations. Through your leadership (or lack thereof), some of you are turning crappy jobs into amazing jobs, and some are turning amazing jobs into crappy jobs. You possess the keys to other people's work experience. While that doesn't sound fair, and perhaps an overweight responsibility, it's reality. It's your reality, and it's your team's reality. Oh yeah, and it's an amazing opportunity!

So, if you're in a job you dislike or hate (as most Americans are), ask yourself why. Is it really the job? Or is it your leaders? The answer to that question may change everything.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Here

Sarah and I recently stumbled upon a fascinating film. I was scrolling through Netflix while Sarah vetoed movie after movie. Nothing sounded good to her, and she wanted me to know that. Eventually, frustrated by her unwillingness to commit, I picked something and said, "This is the one! We're going to watch it, and we're going to enjoy it." It indeed was the one.

The movie is called Here. Released last year, it stars Tom Hanks and Robin Wright, and was directed by Robert Zemeckis (the creator of Back To The Future and Forrest Gump). It's one of the most unique films I've ever watched. For example, the entire movie is set at a single camera position, and the screen never fades out; one continuous shot for 1 hour and 45 minutes. See, fascinating!

Photo Credit: IMDB

It's been nearly two days since we watched it, and I can't get it out of my head. At its core, the movie is a reflection on so many of the ideas shared in this blog:

• The pursuit (or not) of meaningful work.

• How deeply our relationships are woven into the quality of our life.

• The cultural and financial pressures to abandon our dreams.

• The struggle and joy that comes with parenting.

• The impacts (both positively and negatively) our sacrifices make in our journey.

• The haunting power of regret.

• The fleeting nature of time.

• Our inescapable need for meaning and fulfillment.

• The relational and emotional impact of debt and financial tension.

• Our human desire to establish roots.

• The beauty of the simplest and most mundane parts of our lives.

• The humbling reality of our own mortality.

• The miracle of forgiveness and redemption.

• The bonding qualities of sharing a meal together.

• The importance of celebrating major milestones in life.

It was simultaneously the saddest and most joyful thing I've watched in a while. I can't help but reflect on my own journey as a man, a husband, and a father. Life is indeed fleeting, and I ought not waste it.

If you enjoy this blog, I highly recommend you check out this film on Netflix. I can't promise you'll like it, but I can promise it will make you think. I hope you have a wonderful day, filled with beauty in both the big things and the small things.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

A Knock On the Door

Happy Super Bowl Sunday! While my Bears have only been part of it two times in my 40+ years of life, today is always one of my favorite days of the year. There's something special about the energy of Super Bowl Sunday.

It's so easy to look at these grown men and think to ourselves, "They're just doing it for the money." Sure, the money is ridiculous. These athletes make more money in a single year than many people will make over their entire careers. But ultimately, I sincerely don't believe it's about the money. The money is a nice (very nice!) perk, but it's about something so much bigger, and Super Bowl Sunday is one of those days where it shines through so clearly. The euphoria of victory and the agony of defeat. You can't tell me meaning isn't at play.

On a related note, I'm obsessed with the knock on the door. Oh, you don't know about the door knocking?!?! Check out this VIDEO. Each year, when it's time to announce the inductees to the NFL Hall of Fame, Hall of Fame CEO David Baker knocks on the door of each recipient to personally welcome them into the HOF family. These videos choke me up every single time. The video I linked above is a compilation of door knocks, and it makes me melt every time. It's worth four minutes of your day!

There's nothing like seeing grown men who have achieved fame and fortune beyond anything they probably ever dreamed turn into a puddle at the sound of a simple knock. Pure joy. Pure satisfaction. Pure meaning.

Money can buy so much in life, but it can't buy meaning. It can't satiate us. It can't fill our tanks. It can buy almost anything, but it can't buy the few things we crave the most. So while I'm enjoying the game tonight, watching these players give everything they have, while also thinking about David Baker's door knocks, it will be yet another reminder that meaning always transcends money.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Boy, That Escalated Quickly!

In the words of Ron Burgundy, "Boy, that escalated quickly!" Yesterday was one of those days. You know what I'm talking about. The kind of day where you planned one thing, but something totally different happened. The kind of day where everything that could go wrong does go wrong. The kind of day that every time you solve one problem, another replaces it like some twisted game of whack-a-mole. The kind of day where you have problems in areas you didn't even know you had problems. You know, that kind of day!

I typically feel like my work is a juggling act of six distinct endeavors. Each one of them posed its own issues yesterday. It was a tremendously hard day. It wasn't fun at all. I felt like I got chewed up and spit back out. But it sure was rewarding.

This is what often confuses people when I talk about pursuing work that matters. The mere idea of "work that matters" instantly triggers thoughts of rainbows and sunshine. Whenever work is spoken about through the lens of meaning, it conjures up assumptions that it's fun, enjoyable, simple, or easy. The truth is, this couldn't be further from the truth. Pursuing work that matters doesn't mean we're trying to find any of those things.

Meaningful work isn't that. It can be....sometimes....on good days.....well, part of those good days. But at the heart, that's not what it's about. Pursuing work that matters means we're doing something that provides meaning, fulfillment, and purpose to our lives, all while adding value to others, regardless of how fun it is or isn't.

Fun is fleeting. Easy is empty calories. Those aren't the ingredients to work that matters. What's most imporant is the meaning component. Unlike fun and ease, meaning satiates. So while I was completely gassed last night, feeling like I got run over by a snow plow, I was fulfilled, satisfied, and content. Yesterday was exactly what it needed to be, and it turns out, yesterday needed to be anything but fun.

I love what I do more than anything in the world, but not because it's fun. I regularly find myself engaging in the most gut-wrenching conversations of my life, encountering problems I never know if I have the stomach to deal with, all while sabotaging my former life's pursuit of comfort and material wealth. Sarah and I were just talking recently about how much harder life is now than it was six years ago before I left my safe, lucrative, and cushy career. We laughed for a moment, then sighed, before simultaneously acknowledging we wouldn't want to be anywhere else. Another reminder that we've found it......work that matters.

I hope you have a meaningful day today. Not a fun day, a meaningful day. Well, I hope you find some fun along the way as well. We all need a little fun!

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Running Away or Running Toward

I was already contemplating a specific follow-up to my recent post titled Bummer. I still had more to say about this topic, and wanted to make one very clear point. However, my friend Mertz beat me to the punch. He immediately sent me a thoughtful response and asked the very profound question I was hoping to address: Is it possible to like/love your job and still celebrate Fridays?

To summarize, statistics (and my own experience) show that 7 out of 10 Americans dislike or hate their job. A never-ending state that's straddled somewhere between tolerance and misery. My general point is that we should create a life for ourselves that doesn't require us to celebrate Fridays and dread Mondays.

But what about Mertz's question? Can't we have both? Can't we like/love our work and still celebrate Fridays? I couldn't love this question more! For me, I think it comes down to the answer to the next question: Are you running away or running toward?

In other words, do we celebrate Fridays because we're trying to find reprieve from the misery, or do we celebrate Fridays because we're excited for what's to come? It may seem like splitting hairs, but I think it's a cavernous divide.

There's another way to look at it, which was also echoed by Mertz. Perhaps the weekends can be a celebration of a hard week's work well done. Perhaps the weekend is a time to temporarily step away, recharge, and get our head back in the game the following week. Mertz is right....he's so right! One of the reasons I know he's right is that he finds meaning in his work. He's not running away from anything. Sure, his work can be challenging, stressful, and trying......all work has components of this. But when push comes to shove, Mertz pursues work that matters.

I also know he's right because I know what his weekends look like. His weekends are loaded with quality family time, adventures, and dutiful, joyful service at his church. His weekends are valuable to him; not as an escape, but as another meaningful part of a meaningful life.

Here's my last observation about Mertz. I know weekday Mertz, and I know weekend Mertz. It's the same guy. He carries himself with the same energy, generosity, and thoughtfulness whether I see him in the thick of his stressful week or at a casual family event at church. He's the same, and that's a tell!

I do think we should get excited for weekends. I think weekends should be a wonderful time to relax, recharge, spend time with those we love, go on adventures, and prepare for the challenges ahead. I believe all of that. But I also believe it should be through the lens of running toward something, not running away. Through the lens of meaning over money, I believe a meaningful life should be comprised of seven days per week, not just two.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Bing!

Happy Groundhog Day to those who celebrate! What are your favorite Groundhog Day movies? For me, it's probably Groundhog Day....or maybe Groundhog Day. I saw on Facebook last night that my friend Ryan was watching it. On one hand, that's awesome. On the other hand, it's a bit of a party foul to watch it on Groundhog Day Eve. To me, that feels like unloading the Christmas tree and thrashing open all the gifts on Christmas Eve. Oh well, I digress.

Groundhog Day has been and will forever be one of my favorite movies. If you haven't seen it (which is a shame), I'll summarize. Bill Murray, a semi-famous meteorologist from Pittsburgh, begrudgingly travels to nearby Punxsutawney to cover the annual Groundhog Day celebration.

For unknown reasons, Bill Murray gets caught in a time loop where he lives the same day over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over. It's as depressing as it is ridiculous, as thought-provoking as it is hilarious. Underneath its comedic facade is a deeply meaningful movie, filled with wisdom and virtue.

Here's the question I always ask myself while enjoying this film. Is it enough to do the right thing? On a basic level, we know right and wrong. We understand how we should handle ourselves and how we shouldn't. If that's true, is it enough to simply put ourselves through the paces of doing it "the right way?"

As you can imagine, I have an opinion. I tend to believe simply doing the right thing isn't enough. I think it goes deeper than that. I think intent plays a big role in all this, which is woven into the fabric of this film. I call it doing the right things for the right reasons.

It's one thing to do the right thing, but it's an entirely different beast when we're doing the right thing for the right reasons. A sincerity, if you will. A spirit of openhandedness. A posture of generosity. Doing the right thing without any expectations in return.

Oftentimes, we do the right thing if/when it serves our own purposes or self-interest. But what happens when the right thing doesn't benefit us......or even hurts us?

What if doing the right thing means sacrificing ourselves for the betterment of others?

What if doing the right thing means taking a harder path when it means we can make someone else's path easier?

What if doing the right thing means caring so deeply about the intent of the action, knowing well the outcome is very much uncertain?

What if doing the right thing means foregoing more money and a higher standard of living so we can live out a more specific call in our life?

I'm not sure my little rant made total sense, but perhaps it will give you something to think about before or after you watch the film. Not during, though. During the movie, I hope you enjoy it as thoroughly as I will. Oh yeah, and one more thing: Bing!

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

When Your Priorities (Drastically) Change

I was recently scheduled to meet with a client. It was a meeting I had excitedly anticipated for weeks. We had a lot to discuss, with very specific (and big) priorities. I spent much time preparing for the conversation that would likely help them shift the trajectory of their financial life in an awesome and life-altering way.

However, just 30 seconds into the meeting, they dropped a bomb on me. They had just experienced a major life event that will forever change their lives. Major life events come in many shapes and sizes, from the best of the best to the worst of the worst, and everything in between. The types of life changes that impact literally every aspect of our being. The bomb hit hard, and it changed everything.

I took about ten seconds to regroup, then quickly modified the meeting's agenda. Priorities needed to be shifted because, well, priorities were shifting. Everything I had in store for them suddenly seemed meaningless. What seemed like the world's most crucial topic yesterday now felt minuscule and insignificant.

The couple was frustrated. After much hard work, discipline, and consistency, they were excited for this next chapter. Now, after an unexpected turn of events, they quickly realized their reality had shifted.

We spent the following ten minutes processing these feelings. Ultimately, I explained, this is how life works. It's never linear. It rarely goes how we anticipate. Our best-laid plans can go poof at a moment's notice. This isn't proof that their good work is meaningless.....far from it! Rather, it's evidence and affirmation of why they put in the hard work in the first place. Being in their current strong position, which didn't happen by accident, will allow them to absorb the impact of this newfound reality.

Though it's perfectly normal (even healthy) to set a clear path with an identified destination, we must expect life to slow us down, knock us off course, or even alter our plans. It's ok to adjust. Just because we thought we would accomplish xyz last month, it doesn't mean we are failures if new circumstances or altered realities shift the plan.

When reality changes, change with it. When priorities must change, change them. Don't view it through the lens of failure; view it through the lens of life. When we expect life to happen, it's never a surprise when life happens. After all, that's part of the adventure!

I hope your day is smooth and awesome, but if for some reason life slows you down, knocks you off course, or alters your plans, shift with it. That's not a loss, just a different kind of win!

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Today is the Youngest Day of Your Life

I had the privilege of speaking to a youth group last night, and not just any youth group. It's the same youth group I participated in as a leader for ten years. I was invited to speak on the topic of integrating our faith with our finances. Overall, it went fantastic. The kids were engaged, interactive, showed me lots of love, and even laughed at my dumb jokes (pity laughs still count!).

We call this the “Junkyard pose.”

We covered topics including the behavioral science of money and happiness, the importance of being a good steward, avoiding debt, and finding a healthy balance between spending, saving, and giving. I hope it moved the needle. I hope someone's life was impacted by my talk. I hope a trajectory will be altered in some way. I hope my heart and insight landed well. I may never know for sure, but I'll trust....and have faith.

One of the adult leaders approached me afterward and said the magical line I hear more than any other: "I wish someone would have taught me this when I was 16. It would have saved me a lot of mistakes and regrets." Oh, so true! I wish I had that as well!

I have a bit of a bad news, good news situation. If you're 45 years old, I can't dump you into a DeLorean, speed up to 88 MPH, and take you back to your teenage years. It's too late. I can't go back, and you can't go back. We are where we are. Our past is our past, our mistakes are our mistakes, and our regrets are our regrets.

Now, it's time for the good news. Today is the youngest day of your life. You'll never be this young again. It's the youngest you'll ever be. Therefore, perhaps today is the day you make some changes. Pay off debt. Get on a budget. Start giving generously. Transition to the work you're called to. Start investing. Build an emergency fund. Save for that dream trip.

Here's what I don't want for you. I don't want the 85-year-old version of you to say, "I wish I would have done ____ when I was 45. I was so young then."

No, you might not be 16 anymore. Or 25. Or 30. But you are where you are, and it's the youngest you'll ever be. If that's true, you might as well get started now.

Happy youngest day of your life. Let's get started!

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

When Taylor Swift Gives You That Look

I recently ran into one of my former youth group kids. I haven't seen him in a few years, so it was fun to catch up. When I asked him what he's doing for work, his face changed. He shared about a job that seemed uncharacteristic for who I know him to be and for what he dreamed of doing. "That's cool, but what about your dream to _______?" He sighed. Here's what he said. After having enough people tell him his dream was foolish, stupid, and unrealistic, he decided to "get a real job." I could see the frustration in his eyes.

This is the type of rhetoric and narrative that leads us to a point in society where 70% of Americans dislike or hate their jobs. 7 out of 10 of us are living with some form of misery in our work. And then, with the best intentions, we say things and do things to separate people from their dreams, resulting in them following in our footsteps of pursuing work they will likely hate. Thus, the cycle continues.

I know someone else who is foolish, stupid, and unrealistic. His name is Cole, and he's my Meaning Over Money partner. I've talked about Cole countless times on this blog, so this story might not be new to you. After Cole graduated from college, he, too, initially conceded that a "real job" needed to replace any dreams that lived within him. Then, after just a handful of weeks at said real job, he impulsively quit and recklessly started pursuing his dream. It was a mess, but it was his mess.

Last Sunday, I texted Cole and asked if he'd have time to edit the following week's podcast episodes:

"No."

"Why not? What do you have going on?"

"I'm at Arrowhead today."

"Ohhhh. Taylor Swift duty?"

"Yep."

A few hours later, he sent me this video:

You might have seen it if you were tuned into the ESPN pre-game show. It was a short clip of Taylor Swift walking through the underbelly of Arrowhead Stadium, preparing to watch Travis Kelce suit up for a chance to go to the AFC Championship Game. Cole shot that for ESPN. Watch as she turns the corner and looks back at him. That look!

I don't think Cole is all that special. He's not extraordinarily brilliant, though he’s sharp. He doesn't stand above the crowd, though he’s talented. He doesn't have some special privilege or access that's unavailable to the rest of us. I do think three things set him apart from most people, though. Again, these three traits aren't special, but the presence of these traits can create something special:

• He believes in himself and his calling.

• He values meaning more than anything.

• He doesn't care what others think.

All three of those traits are available to each of us. So, while Cole isn't special, the path he chooses is. It's the path of the 30%. The path toward meaning over money. The pursuit of work that matters.

Our mission isn't to follow in Cole's footsteps. Our mission is to follow the steps we're each meant to follow.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Fake Until You Break

There's a narrative pervasively weaving its way through social media and our culture. It says this: Millenials are screwed, victims of bad timing and circumstance. First, I need to confirm that I am, in fact, a Millennial. This demographic group is currently between 30 and 43 years old, and I slot in at the high end of this range.

I'm not going to dive into all the reasons this generation feels wronged and victimized. I don't think it's worth the time to write or read. While I understand where these arguments come from, I also recognize all generations deal with their own version of struggle, pain, and suffering.

Instead, I want to discuss the other side of this never-ending debate. Wells Fargo recently completed a study of Millenials who have an annual household income of $250,000+. What they discovered was that 59% of Millenials in this camp believe "it's important to appear financially successful to others." To put that in comparison, only 35% of Gen X and 14% of Baby Boomers had a similar belief.

6 out of 10 Millenials believe it's important to appear financially successful in the eyes of others. More than half of the people in my generation! That has deep and powerful implications. Of the 59% of Millenials who think this way, 41% of them admit to funding their lifestyle through credit cards and other consumer debt. Only 28% of Gen X and 6% of Baby Boomers do the same.

This is self-sabotage at the highest level. These toxic perspectives and the behaviors associated with them are literally driving an entire generation into the ground. It's a fake-it-until-you-make-it type of life we're living, but ultimately, it's more like fake until you break.

Yes, our generation has faced headwinds these past 20 years. Yes, there are things that make life hard. But nothing is making life as hard as we're making it on ourselves. We're literally breaking our own family structures for the sake of looking rich. We can say all we want that it's not happening, but the data says it is......and so does my experience working with hundreds of families. We're spending ourselves into oblivion.

What's the alternative? Instead of caring what others think and trying to keep up with the Joneses, we should focus on what matters most. We should live with humility, discipline, and intentionality. We should pursue a life of meaning above all else. More stuff, status, and wealth will never provide the satiation you're looking for. Only meaning can provide that. And meaning can't be found on the other side of a purchase. My generation, at 30-43 years old, is still relatively young. We have time to figure this out. We can right the ship and lead ourselves into a productive life full of meaning, joy, peace, and impact. But that doesn't happen on accident. It must be chosen, then aggressively pursued.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

More vs. Better

One of my friends received an amazing job offer! It's a different company within her industry. It offers more robust responsibilities, a higher-profile role, and better visibility to leadership. It provides tremendous growth opportunities in multiple directions. Did I mention it's also DOUBLE her existing compensation structure? We're talking about a massive pay raise. I don't mean this to sound like hyperbole, but she'll likely never have to worry about money again. It's that type of offer.

She turned it down.

Yes, that's correct. She said "no." She walked away from what most would consider the opportunity of a lifetime. Pretty stupid, right? Well, stupid by our culture's standards. That job offer was the epitome of what we fight for when trying to progress through our careers. We work, work, work, and work, hoping that one day we'll get that big break that changes everything. That was hers......and she turned her back on it.

Why in the world would she do something like that?!?!? I'll tell you why. She prioritizes better over more. She's living her best life right now. She loves her job, her co-workers, her leaders, the culture, the work, the responsibilities, and the balance she's created between work, marriage, parenting, friends, and serving. While this job opportunity could have provided more (much more!), it couldn't provide better.

This is what meaning over money is all about. I couldn't be prouder of her, happier for her (and her family), or more excited for what's likely to unfold in her life in the months and years to come. Her current path will surely push her, stretch her, challenge her, and reward her. It's going to be a fun journey.

Always choose better over more. Other people won't understand. You'll probably get criticized. Culture will call you stupid. It might be a more stressful path. It won't be as secure, comfortable, or easy. But better is always better.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

The Myth of Making It

Someday, I'll "make it." Famous last words!

“Making it” means different things to different people. For some, it means getting out of debt. For others, it means becoming a millionaire. Some people want to attain xyz title at work. Maybe it means landing a certain client. Or driving a car with that specific emblem. Perhaps there's a particular revenue goal. Your kid goes to an Ivy League college. What if you finally land on the cover of a magazine? One day, you'll finally get that degree.

We love to put pins on the map of our future and definitively say that's the moment when we've "made it." Unfortunately, it's a lie. It's not a lie because these things can't happen.....they can. It's not a lie because they don't matter.....they do. It's a lie because every time we achieve something, we move the goalposts further out. If having a net worth of $1M is making it, the moment you get it, the new definition of "making it" becomes $2M, then $5M, then $10M, and so on.

Years ago, when Cole and I shared a dumpy little office, he had this amazing bottle of bourbon. It was a special edition bottle, signed by the band Slipknot. He would regularly talk about how, after "making it," we would pop the cork and enjoy that special bottle. Since that day, he and we have achieved far more than we had ever expected......yet, that bottle is still unopened. Why? Because every time he hit a milestone, a new milestone took its place.

Here's my point. There is no "making it." That's a myth. As humans, we'll quickly reset expectations as soon as we reach the goal. There is no magical point where our lives magically become perfect, or we achieve maximum success. Rather, it's about the journey. We should live with contentment, strive to get a bit better each day, celebrate all the wins (even the small ones), and find meaning in all of it. Oh yeah, and pop the cork on that bottle, Cole. You're never going to make it, but man, you're doing it.

My challenge for you today is to stop defining which hurdles you'll someday hit to "make it." I promise you, by the time you achieve them, you will have already moved the goal posts on yourself. If that's true, just keep moving forward, living with meaning, enjoying the journey. Oh yeah, and pop that cork.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Growth For Growth’s Sake

I recently enjoyed lunch with an old friend. He's a former colleague who went on to create his own business. Over the years, his business has grown substantially, to the point where it now provides an income that far exceeds anything he or his wife ever imagined. To put it bluntly, his family is well taken care of.

That's the setup for what I'm about to say. He's stressed, stretched thin, and running out of steam. He's a grinder, and it's all catching up to him. In the same conversation, he mentioned to me that his goal is to grow the business by x% in 2025. My response: "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why are you striving to grow so much when you're already stretched so thin and running on empty?"

"Isn't that what I'm supposed to do? If you're not growing, your dying."

My friend is stuck in a success paradox. He's created something that's truly successful, but simultaneously, he created a life and career that can't provide peace and contentment. In his effort to gain security, he unintentionally self-sabotaged himself to the point where he can never enjoy it.

I need to clarify one thing. This guy loves what he does. He's living his calling, his meaning, and his purpose. He's doing exactly what he's meant to do, and that's awesome! However, at the same time, he's caught in the trap.

My next question was simple and straight to the point: "What do you really want?"

Not surprisingly, he said things such as being a present father, a supporting spouse, getting more involved in his church, feeling more peace, and finding more time to get away with the family.

His current business allows for all of this! He's already there! On the flip side, pursuing x% growth in the season ahead will most certainly hinder these goals. Therefore, he has a simple choice to make: meaning or money. Growth for growth's sake is a money grab, an ego grab, or both. But it's not meaning.

Whether you own a business or not, I think this concept can and should hit close to him. Growth for growth's sake. More for more's sake. Newer for newer's sake. Bigger for bigger's sake. Fancier for fancier's sake. These all lead us to the same place. When we strive for more just because "that's what we're supposed to do," we inadvertently self-sabotage our bigger purpose and our true goals.

As we walked out of the restaurant, I told my friend I hope his business doesn't grow in 2025. I hope it stays exactly how it is: amazing. If so, he'll position himself to do everything he says is important to him. Sure, more feels good. It's shiny. It's sexy. It's stokes our ego. But meaning always trumps it. Every. Single. Time.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

The Value of a (Great) Partner

I've been getting tons of feedback on the post about my friend Dan's tiny house. In my piece, I discussed his knack for formulating absurd ideas.....and then executing them. Being as close as I am to him, I didn't even consider the most common feedback I would eventually receive:

• "It's easy to do those things when you're single."

• "He must not be married."

• "Sounds like he doesn't have kids."

• "Is there a way to do something like that if you're married with kids?"

Again, this angle never crossed my mind. Dan is happily married and has two teen sons. This fact surprised many. Why? Because big dreams, absurd ideas, and wild callings can oftentimes get crushed by our partners. So the fact that Dan has followed through with these beautiful ideas is a testament not only to him, but also his amazing wife, Suzanne.

It's true. She's a huge supporter, encourager, and fellow dreamer alongside Dan. That's the value of a great partner. Dan doesn't accomplish these big dreams despite his partner, but because of his partner. So beautiful!

People sometimes ask me how I quit my previous career, took a 90% pay cut, and started over with twin three-year-olds and a wife who stayed at home. Translation: "I can't believe your wife would allow you to do something so stupid and not leave you in the process." The truth is she was in favor of me making that decision, and was more than a year ahead of me on being ready for that to happen. She not only encouraged me, but she dreamed right alongside me. That's the value of a great partner.

It's not to say that Dan and Suzanne have a perfect marriage. And it's definitely not to say that Sarah and I have a perfect marriage (we have lots of junk in our relationship). But I can confidently testify that both relationships allow for big dreams and counter-cultural callings.

Enough forces in our lives tell us to let our dreams die. It's the way of the world. We develop big dreams as children, only to have them figuratively beat out of us as we work our way toward adulthood. Then, once every ounce of zest has been ripped from our souls, we concede to live a life we can tolerate for the next several decades until we're finally able to escape our variation of misery via retirement.

With a great partner and the freedom to put meaning over money, we can free ourselves from the tyranny of this modern-day trap. If your partner isn't there, not all is lost. Engage in the subject. Share the vision. Encourage having the freedom to dream. Don't give up hope. I've seen many couples develop this after what seemed insurmountable odds. It's never too late to embrace meaning and the road less traveled. It might just take one partner making the first move.

Yes, Dan is married. He has a good one in Suzanne. Whatever credit you attribute to him, you might as well shift it to her. The value of a great partner is priceless.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Where There’s a Will

I know a lot of people that do a lot of absurd things, and I mean that in the best of ways. For as much as people tell me I live a weird life, I'm surrounded by weirdos. Take my friend Dan, for example. Several years back, Dan decided he wanted to run 100 miles in a single day. See, I'm telling you! Anyway, he had this ridiculous idea that running 100 miles in a day is not only possible, but appealing. Then, he did it!

Dan also had another absurd idea. Back in 2018 or 2019, he revealed to me that he wanted to build a tiny house with his bare hands and use it as a retreat for himself, his family, and his friends. Not long after that, he presented me with some architectural drawings of what it would look like. Oh, I guess he was serious.

Fast forward five years, and he recently completed his house. To celebrate and commemorate the moment, he invited me and three other guys to stay in the house with him a few nights ago. The five of us had a blast, and it was amazing to see his dream come to life.

Posing in the new house!

Dan lives life via a series of absurd ideas. However, he doesn't talk about things that he might someday think about possibly wanting to consider dreaming about doing. No, he does. He simply does. He's called to something, then acts. He dreams of something, then follows through. He develops a plan, then executes. If there's a will, there's a way......regardless of how crazy the idea might sound.

There's one caveat I need to share, though. Dan isn't superhuman. He's not larger than life. Truth is, he can't do it alone. He trusts and relies on the people around him to support him, encourage him, walk alongside him, and fill in his gaps. That's the secret, though. We weren't meant to do life alone. His dependency on others is a strength, not a weakness. Dan cracked one of the cheat codes of life.

See that picture above? Every person in that photo (plus many more) played roles on the day of Dan's ridiculous 100-mile run. Cheat code. Similarly, the same group of guys donated their time, talents, or resources to help bring the tiny house dream to life. Cheat code. Other people's involvement doesn't lessen his monumental achievements.....it just gives him more people to celebrate them with. These are still Dan's wins, but shared amongst people he loves and who love him. Double win!

Where there's a will, there's a way. And the way likely involves others. Please dream big. Please believe in your ideas.....even the absurd ones. Please have the courage to go for it. Please have the humility to bring others into the fold. Life is better together, and together, we can achieve far greater things.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

The Mortality Is Real

One of my former schoolmates from my childhood recently lost her battle with cancer. She was just 39 years old, leaving behind a husband, two small children, and an army of friends. We weren't close, but we did have the opportunity to connect over social media a few times over the last handful of years.

Over the past 48 hours, I've realized how much this has impacted me. We often live our day-to-day lives with the general assumption we have a long time remaining. We picture ourselves as old, wrinkly, and frail. We treat our days, weeks, and months as if there will be countless more to follow.

Our mortality is real, though. We don't know how much more time we have left. Our days are numbered, whether few or many, short or long. If that's true, why do we spend so much time obsessing about money, stuff, and status?

I once heard something that stuck with me. An old man, worth tens of millions of dollars, was reflecting on his life and his mortality. He said he would give up everything (all his money, stuff, and status) to be 40 again. Unfortunately, he can't. There are no DeLoreans for us to jump into. However, what if you're 40 today? Or 50? Or 30? Or even 20? Based on this rich man's perspective, what you have is more valuable than tens of millions of dollars. It's worth more than all the money, stuff, and status one could have. The same money, stuff, and status you're spending your days, weeks, and months trying to attain. Let that sink in.

The mortality is real, man. I feel so heartbroken for my friend's family. They lost a good one in her. But I don't think her story will be in vain. I truly believe it will inspire thousands of people to live with more meaning and purpose. Her impact will ripple for decades to come. Perhaps this blog post can be a small springboard to share that message.

I don't know if you needed to hear this today, I sure did. Have a meaningful, awesome day.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Focusing On the Right Keywords

I've received a bunch of feedback from yesterday's post about Cole's road-less-traveled approach to life and work, and how he exchanged security for meaning. Many found it encouraging, some believe my ideas are far-fetched and inaccessible to most, and some simply lashed out in anger. But two trusted friends sent me similar thoughtful responses that are worth digesting. In short, their responses followed one clear and specific idea: traditional jobs can provide meaning, too.

I'm often accused of swinging the pendulum too far in favor of self-employment and business ownership, but that's never my intent. Rather, I try to focus on keywords. Did you spot the keyword in yesterday's post? First, I'll tell you all the NON-keywords:

• It wasn't "security"

• It wasn't "steady"

• It wasn't "good office job"

• It wasn't "responsible job"

• It wasn't "safe"

There's nothing inherently wrong with any of those things. Here's the keyword from my post: "miserable." Cole was absolutely miserable in his job. It's not to say that Cole couldn't have found some level of meaning in that work, but him taking that job was a square-peg-round-hole type situation. The only redeeming value of that job was whatever money or security it provided. It was a means to an end. With that said, that exact job might be the dream job for someone else. Someone with a different wiring, different calling, different passion, and different skillset might have crushed that role.

See, it's never about chasing insecurity, counter-culturalism, irresponsibility, or controversial path. It's about chasing meaning. It's about understanding ourselves enough to know what work matters to us, and what work doesn't. For as much as I'm impressed by Cole's work, it sounds miserable if I put myself in his shoes. I would never want to do what he does, as it doesn't align with my wiring, calling, passion, or skillset. Vice versa, while I thrive in my work, it would be Cole's worst nightmare if he had to walk in my shoes.

I'm a HUGE fan of traditional jobs......if they align with that person's wiring, values, and objectives. It's not my job to tell people what work to pursue or not pursue. Rather, it's my job to help people find their ideal work, then aggressively pursue it. I know people who have worked the same traditional job for two decades and find a ton of meaning in it. Similarly, I know people who have bucked normal, chased entrepreneurship or self-employment, and are utterly miserable. The right answer is whatever is right for you. The wrong answer is whatever is wrong for you.

I spent 15 years in corporate America, and it was fulfilling for me. I could have absolutely stuck with that path for the rest of my career and had an amazingly fulfilling and meaningful journey. I recently ran into a bunch of my former colleagues, and many of them are living the most beautiful and meaningful lives.

I appreciate my friends for calling me out when it seems like I'm unintentionally bending one way on this. Never my intent. However, I will forever violently bend all the way in the favor of meaning. Always seek it, and never let others tell you where you should find it.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Ode To Insecurity

Today's post is about Cole Netten, my Meaning Over Money partner. My relationship with Cole and his wife Kate began in their later college years, as they were about ready to graduate, get married, and join the working world. Upon graduation, Kate began her teaching career, and Cole found a pretty good office job. It wasn't the job of his dreams, but it was safe, steady, and provided security for his new family. It was a responsible job.

Just days into his new job, I invited Cole to lunch since we were now working in the same building. When he showed up, he looked like a shell of his former self. It was still Cole, but yet it wasn't. His zest for life seemed missing. His go-with-the-flow nature was replaced with angst. He looked absolutely miserable!

Within a matter of weeks, Cole impulsively quit his job and told Kate about this decision AFTER he did it. Yikes! What in the world was he thinking!?!? He landed a solid job right out of college! This job would have provided a nice income for them. It would have helped them grind out their debt. It would have allowed them a higher standard of living. It most certainly would have felt more secure. Yet, Cole instinctively lit a match and burned it down.

Fast forward several years, and Cole and Kate still don't have security. Their standard of living isn't something to envy. Their financial life is anything but steady or predictable. While all that may be true, there's something else I need to add: They live a truly blessed life. Cole's career as a filmmaker is just as choppy and uncertain as it's ever been. Kate primarily stays home with their THREE kids, from newborn to four. In my opinion, their marriage is something worth mimicking. They are truly a special couple. But "secure" isn't on their scorecard of life.

A few days ago, Amazon Prime released a new documentary titled ChiefsAholic, a film about a Kansas City Chiefs Superfan who was secretly living a double life as a serial bank robber. Cole helped make this movie!

Add this to the ridiculous list of projects he's done:

• Shooting feature segments for College Gameday.

• Manning Taylor Swift watch in the underbelly of Arrowhead Stadium for ESPN.

• Doing commercial work for prominent regional and national companies.

• An accomplished drone pilot.

• Shooting and grip work for feature Hollywood films and documentaries.

• Shooting post-game press conferences in the Kansas City Chiefs locker room.

• Shooting weddings for NFL superstars.

Oh yeah, and he's barely 30-years-old. He's done all this in less than a decade. What in the heck is he going to do in the next 10, 20, or 30 years? All because he turned his back on a "good" job. A "secure" job. A "responsible" job.

I'm so freaking proud of this guy. Not so much for what he's accomplished, but for the road-less-traveled example he's setting for hundreds or thousands of people around him. Meaning over money. Purpose over security. It's one thing to say it, but another to live it. He and Kate live it.

Take from this what you will. Oh yeah, and go watch ChiefsAholic on Amazon Prime!

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Now What?

It's the middle of the night. I'm exhausted, but I can't sleep. My brain won't turn off. All I can think about are the three most wonderful days celebrating Christmas our family just experienced. It wasn't perfect, but man, it was good. And now it's over. All the anticipation, all the hype, all the fun…..and it's over. Now what?

This can be a depressing and loaded question. Science shows that the anticipation for a particular event is as fulfilling and enriching as the event itself. That's why we often experience hangovers when the event is done. A mourning. A grieving. A lonely feeling. That's what I'm experiencing as I'm lying here awake. Now what?

That question oddly makes me smile. While I'll inevitably be exhausted today, and sad Christmas is over, I have the honor of returning to some pretty amazing work. I have a few client meetings teed up where I'll have the opportunity to celebrate their awesome work in 2024 while preparing what's to come. I have a strategic planning meeting with TJ to set the table for Northern Vessel's next year. I have some key projects for my dry ice client that are coming to a head. I'm meeting with a few struggling families that just need a hand-up. I'm speaking in front of an excited and engaging audience. 

I'm fortunate. Not everyone has this answer to the "Now what?" question. Most people will, unfortunately, have a different type of answer. Statistics show that roughly 7 in 10 Americans will have a pit-in-the-stomach feeling when confronted with this question. That's so sad, but I get it. I've been there, too! If that's you, I challenge you to consider making a shift in the new year. You deserve better. You deserve a life that doesn't involve inevitable pain on the backside of fun events. You deserve joy before the event, during the event, AND after the event. 

Maybe that's the gift you need to give yourself. It does exist. It is an option. It's right there waiting for you. Please don't let fear hold you back. Now what? Hopefully something awesome!

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

A Christmas Fortune

We had a beautiful Christmas Eve yesterday. As always, it included an unsuccessful attempt at a decent family photo:

After church service, we enjoyed our traditional Christmas Eve Chinese dinner. When the bill came, four fortune cookies sat atop the little black receipt sleeve. The boys quickly tore into theirs. Finn's was about the virtue of being a lifelong learner, and Pax's talked about how his life was about to turn around (whatever that means for an 8-year-old). Then, I opened mine: "Happiness isn't in having what you want but rather in wanting what you have."

Contentment. For many, today is about getting more and having more. Millions of Americans will inventory all the cool gadgets and gizmos they now possess. Countless people will record and publish "Christmas haul" videos on YouTube, showcasing their new swag. Seriously, search for "Christmas haul" on YouTube.

I fall more into the fortune cookie's camp. Happiness isn't having what I want. If that were true, I'd be running a never-ending race. Every time I get what I want, instead of being happy, I'd just want something else.

On the flip side, I want what I have. I'm grateful for what I have. I cherish my life and all that I'm blessed with. While it's easy to point our eyes outward at what everyone else has, I much prefer to look inward and simply be grateful.....period.

Choose contentment. Remember what's most important. Be grateful for all you have. Your health, your family, a warm place to live, food on the table, a job that provides, the freedom to live the life we choose. Oh yeah, I'm grateful for my God as well. If you're a believer, I hope that's also at the center of your day.

Merry Christmas, all!

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.