How Many Apples Are In a Seed?

Check out this awesome clip!

@uconnwbb these two 🥹 #uconnwomensbasketball #bleedblue ♬ original sound - UConn Women’s Basketball

This touching moment involves UCONN's Coach Geno Auriemma and Nika Muhl. Nika just wrapped up her UCONN basketball career and was drafted into the WNBA just a few weeks ago. This is easily the best thing I've seen all day!

I often refer to the idea of planting seeds. A quick word search of my blog archives reveals that I've discussed this concept in 14 prior posts. When I see a video clip like this and can feel the relationship this player and coach share, it strikes me as a quintessential example of planting seeds. 

Coach Geno is 70 years old, and for the last 40 of them, he has been at the helm of UCONN's women's basketball team. When I see the bond he shares with Nika and the impact he's clearly had on her life, I can't help but wonder how many seeds he's planted over the years. 

This past weekend, while at a generosity conference, a speaker began talking about planting seeds. Oh, you know I was leaning forward for this one! She cut into an apple and started picking out seeds. "You can count how many seeds are in an apple, but you can't count how many apples are in a seed." 

That's one of the most powerful ideas I've ever heard. Planting a seed is one thing, but the ripple effects are another. Let's say we plant ten seeds, and only one takes hold and grows (into an apple tree, of course). That tree will produce hundreds or thousands of apples, each filled with numerous seeds. Eventually, some of those new seeds will take hold and grow trees as well......and the cycle continues. From a single seed comes an immeasurable number of apples. A single act of planting a seed could result in multiple generations of impact. Beautiful!

Back to Coach Geno and Nika. He planted seeds, and some (or tons) prospered.....including Nika. Now, she will spend the next 60+ years planting her own seeds, and some of them will prosper as well. Call me sentimental, but this is a profoundly moving illustration of living a life of service to others. 

Our call to action is simple: plant seeds. What happens after we plant is largely out of our control. However, know that good WILL come from your generosity. And when it does, the impact may span much wider and deeper than you'll ever know. 

Creativity is a Renewable Resource

18 months ago, while enjoying a coffee with my close friend and mentor, Gary Hoag, I confided that I was struggling with my writing. Specifically, I struggled finding the time and the ideas to publish 2-3 pieces per month. His advice was simple and absurd: "Just write every day." Ah yes, why didn't I think of that!?!? I don't have time or ideas to write 2-3 times per month, so let's go ahead and write 30 times per month. Does this sound as crazy to you as it did to me? To be honest, I'd probably jump off a cliff if Gary suggested it. For that reason, and perhaps combined with a momentary lapse in judgment, I took his advice.

Today is my 500th article published in 500 days. It feels weird even typing that. 238,000 words sent into cyberspace, hoping to move the needle in someone's life. It started with a handful of people already subscribed to my previous blog (plus a few new pity follows from friends and family). Fast forward 500 days and the addition of many new faces, and The Daily Meaning has been e-mailed 62,000 times (plus however many people have stopped by the website to read it). Wow…just wow!

Out of curiosity, I just Googled, "What is a normal open rate for e-mail newsletters?" Depending on the source, anything between 15%-25% should be viewed as "good." In other words, if 1,000 e-mails are sent, it would be a success if 150-250 of them are opened. Not you guys, though….. you're built differently. Of the 62,000 e-mails that have been sent, approximately 70% have been opened. What!?!? I noticed this trend early on, and it's boggled my mind ever since. To say I'm grateful would be the world's biggest understatement. Releasing this blog into the world each morning, and the engagement you show in return, is one of the biggest joys of my life. I never take that opportunity (and responsibility) for granted.

If there's one lesson I've learned from this crazy endeavor, it's this: creativity is a renewable resource. In the past, I would have tightly held my "good ideas" while seeking the perfect time to release them into the world. It was a form of hoarding, in some sense. But it does no good stuck in my brain. On the flip side, sharing our creativity is an act of generosity. It allows the opportunity to make a difference and add value to people's lives.

Something else happens when we release our creativity into the world. It's like pruning a shrub. After we prune a shrub, there's less plant remaining; we took something away. In short order, however, it grows faster, fuller, and better. Creativity is much the same way. When we share something with the world, we're initially left with less. However, the act of sharing spurs our creativity to grow faster, fuller, and better. It's the ultimate renewable resource.

Yes, you're creative. Whether you're a traditional creative (artist, photographer, musician, etc.) or someone who views yourself as "not a creative person," you ARE creative. You have something to share. Something that matters. Something that will add value to other people's lives. Share it. Just share it. It's a renewable resource.

The Drink That Satiates

When I was a kid, I distinctly remember an advertising battle between Coke and Pepsi. The rivalry ran so deep that they would openly bash one another in their TV and print ads (at least that's how my questionable childhood brain remembers it). Anyway, one of the nuances I remember playing out was this back-and-forth debate about taste tests. Despite Coke being the overwhelmingly favorite drink of consumers, Pepsi continually (and oddly) produced results showing they were preferred in taste tests.

Here's where things get interesting, and it has to do with one particular word: "taste." Pepsi would win taste tests, yet people would buy Coke. Why? People don't taste pop; they drink it. Pepsi's taste was more appealing (dare I say sexy?), but it wasn't satiating. The surface-level appeal works great as long as you're just tasting it......but that's not how the product is consumed.

Happiness is the same thing. It tastes great. It's extremely appealing....even sexy. We violently pursue it with our actions and behaviors (often counterproductively). But just like Pepsi, it's not satiating. And like our pop-drinking experience, we're not in the tasting business. We don't taste life.....we drink it….we live it.

This is why, in my humble but convicted opinion, we often live with a void in our lives. We do everything we can to fill this void with happiness, but happiness is fleeting. I drove my new (to me) 350Z for a bit yesterday. It was only 36 degrees out, but I rolled the top down and cranked up the Twenty One Pilots. It made me happy. It was pure fun. It was also fleeting. That's not to demean the experience or treat it as if it doesn't matter. Rather, it's fair to recognize money, stuff, and status cannot satiate us. They can provide a momentary jolt of happiness (tastes great!), but it doesn't fill the void.

It's okay to taste the Pepsis of life. They taste good! They're appealing. They're fun. Absolutely nothing wrong with that! On the flip side, we need to recognize those things can never and will never satiate. They aren't the prescription for what ails us. They aren't the solution to fill the void.

Instead, what we're really searching for meaning and fulfillment. We're looking for something that motivates us to get out of bed and gives us the opportunity to make a difference. That idea takes a few different forms. First, generosity. Generosity fills our tanks unlike any material self-satisfying purchase can. Generosity always wins, and the giver is often the biggest beneficiary of the gift. Second, we need to pursue work that matters. Not work that pays a ton. Not work that gives us status. Not work that's fun. Not work that's easy. Work that matters. Using our gifts and passions to make a difference. Be productive. Add value to others. It’s simple, but powerful.

That's the Coke of life. It's not as appealing or sexy, and it doesn't give us that instant jolt, but man, it satiates! Drink up!

Maximize Your Life, Not Your Income

Career shifts are scary. They are an act of trust. We're leaving something familiar and transitioning to the unknown. When considering a career shift, conventional wisdom says we need to build up our future income until it meets or exceeds our current income, then jump ship. This advice is repeatedly and confidently bestowed by one of our culture's most prominent financial gurus.

I couldn't disagree more with this strategy. It's a form of anchoring. Whether we're currently making $50,000 or $500,000, we're told that's the hurdle. That's the threshold for success. We need to recreate this level of income in our new chapter of life. Why? What's the point? So we can live the very same lifestyle? So we can continue making the same amount of financial progress? Regardless of the answer, the point of this idea is to maximize our income. Culture is fine if we want to change jobs, but only if we continue to make as much money as possible.

Again, I couldn't disagree more. Instead of maximizing our income, I believe we should maximize our lives. When I left my prior career nearly five years ago, our family took a 90% pay cut (when we had twin two-year-olds). That was one of the scariest things we've ever done. Not only did we not follow conventional wisdom, we blatantly disrespected it. People were quite unhappy with this decision. People who love me dearly. People who were terrified for our family's fate.

When Sarah and I made that switch, not only could we not maintain the same lifestyle and financial progress as before, but we literally didn't make enough income to pay our monthly bills. It took seven months to claw our way to a place where our monthly income was enough to pay for our basic needs. Again, that was terrifying!

The only reason we could physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and relationally do this is because we weren't trying to maximize our income. We were trying to maximize our life. And maximize we did! It was the hardest thing we've ever done but also the most rewarding. It allowed us to live with meaning, create impact, and unlock a richer life.

As I'm writing this, I'm thinking about several friends who desperately want to make career shifts. They are passionate and brilliant at their craft. They will surely change the world. Their future is brighter than the sun. Just one problem, though. They are falling for the lie. They have been led to believe their new income must match their current income before making the shift. They don't. That's ridiculous. Each of them could make the shift today, and their lives would immediately benefit (as would the lives of those whom they would subsequently serve with their gifts and passions). They don't even need to take a 90% pay cut. For most, it's 10%, 20%, or maybe even 30%. Small price to pay for a life of meaning and impact.

If you're reading this, you know who you are! Do it! This is your time!

Never From a Coach’s Mouth

Today's post was inspired by a text exchange with my friend Ashley. It was regarding a trending news story about the Long Beach State men's basketball program. If you aren’t familiar, it's a doozy. Their 62-year-old head coach, Dan Monson, has been at the helm of their basketball program for the last 17 years. However, this was a tough season for the 49ers. They were predicted to finish near the top of the conference standings, but headed into the conference tournament ranked 5th (with a 5-game losing streak under the belt).

Wanting to do what's right, Coach Monson approached the athletic department ahead of the conference tournament and said he would resign if they didn't perform better in the tourney. No need, said the athletic director, as the decision to fire him had already been made. Ouch! His job was already dead, but he didn't know it yet. He entered the conference tournament as a lame-duck coach......and they won it all! their reward? A trip to the big dance. It's an amazing story, and we'll see what their next chapter looks like when his 15-seed team faces the 2-seed Arizona Wildcats later today.

While I couldn't love this story more, what Ashley said next is what got me worked up. She highlighted the fact you never hear a coach say, "Only x more years until I retire." So true! How many coaches can you count at or above the traditional retirement age? Tons! Many of us have played for a coach, at some level, who was well into his/her 70s. Older coaches are so common that the seasoned, grizzled veteran coach has been a TV and movie trope for decades.

I have a theory about why. No, it's not because they make boatloads of money (most don't, anyway). No, it's not because of the excellent benefits (many have little to no benefits). No, it's not because it's a simple and easy job (it's anything but!). Here's my theory. Coaches don't choose coaching for the money; they choose it for the meaning. Therefore, they aren't trying to race to the finish line. It's about the journey, not the destination. They wake up each day with a sense of purpose and anticipation for what's to come. When we live in this manner, our life is better WITH work than WITHOUT. It adds a richness to our life. Coaches know this!

While I'm not advocating we all quit our jobs and become coaches, I do think we could learn something by watching how coaches navigate their lives and careers. They are far from perfect, and they experience stress, turmoil, tension, and an often brutal schedule/lifestyle. But you'll rarely see a coach count down to the retirement finish line. If anything, you'll hear statements like, "I'll do it for as long as I can," or "I hope I can do this for at least x years." Passion, meaning, fulfillment, and impact.

Pay attention to this dynamic as you watch and enjoy the games in the coming days. Oh yeah, and go Cyclones!

You Aren’t Buying Subs

Every year, our youth group sells homemade sub sandwiches to our church members as a fundraiser to defray the cost of our summer mission trips. One week, the students pass out flyers and order forms; the next week, the sandwiches are made and available for pickup.

When I began participating in this event, it struck me as odd that they sold these subs for $5 each. Though I call it "odd," it was very much a normal approach. Sell a product, make a profit, raise money. I suggested eliminating prices altogether and letting people pay whatever they desire. There was understandable pushback to this idea. "What if people didn't pay anything?" "What if they paid less than $5?" "All our work could be for nothing." All valid concerns!

I posed a different perspective. Instead of treating people like they were buying subs, we should approach the event as though people were investing in the mission. It's true that if we charge $5 per sub, we'll absolutely receive $5 per sub. That's undeniable. However, on the flip side, the most we will receive is $5 per sub. $5 on the low end and $5 on the high end.....that's a narrow band.

Instead, if we treated the event (and actually believed) that people were investing in the mission, I believed we would raise far more than $5 per sub. People hesitated to buy into this idea, so I made them a deal. I felt so confident in this alternative approach that I promised to personally compensate them for any shortfall incurred by my strategy. I'm not sure they believed me, but I sincerely meant it.

The results? Many people did, in fact, give little to nothing. This is an inevitable outcome when we rip up the boundaries. Some people will abuse the system when the opportunity allows it. That's just a fact of life. However, that isn't the end of the story. Despite having many people give between $0-$5, we ended with an average of approximately $8 per sub. Seeing that people were indeed there to invest in the mission was an extraordinary moment. Fast forward many years, and we had our most recent sub fundraiser event last week. I wasn't involved this year, so I participated as the father of two hungry little boys. No prices! I loved it! It was a fun opportunity to invest in the mission.

This brings me to you. As you're out living your life, always keep your eyes open for opportunities to invest. There are so many people and organizations seeking to make an impact. People and organizations that want to do good in this world. When you encounter them, don't view them as someone who needs your money. Don't treat it like a transaction. Don't merely buy a product or a service from them. Invest in them. Give with meaning. Take advantage of the opportunity to be part of something bigger than you.

You aren't buying subs. You're investing in the mission. Embrace that beautiful opportunity!

The Wonderfully Woven Web of Impact

If you follow me on IG, Facebook, or LinkedIn, you've probably seen bits and pieces of the blog repurposed into other content. Claire, my social media manager, loves digesting the blog and grabbing pieces that move her or could add value to different audiences. She recently posted a snippet from a blog post about relationships, including the following picture.

That's my friend John. I visited him and his wife Jamy a few months ago in Las Vegas. I first met him on a trip to Mongolia in 2017, and he's been a major influence on my life ever since.

After that picture landed on my IG feed, a good friend, who lives in my town, DM'd me: "Is that John!?!?" I've never lived in the same metro as John. I met him in Mongolia, and we serve on a board together in Southeast Asia. And now, my other friend, who I served alongside at our local youth group for several years, is messaging me out of the blue to tell me how John played a vital role in her life?!?! This small-world moment blew my mind.....though it probably shouldn't have. 

John is the perfect example of the new phrase I shall coin: the wonderfully woven web of impact. It sounds cheesy, but who doesn't love a good alliteration? Here, let me draw it out for you.

• John played a vital role in my friend's life.

• The same John, thousands of miles away, played a different vital role in my life.  

• My friend and I have led intertwined journeys for many years, which undoubtedly impacted each other. 

• Together, we've played valuable roles in young adults' lives in our city through our joint youth group efforts. Without a doubt, both of us were equipped, encouraged, and enabled by the impact of our mutual friend, John. 

Until recently, neither of us knew about the other's relationship or the resulting impact of John's presence in our lives. Even until this moment, John didn't know about this connection, either! If all goes well, John is opening this e-mail with a coffee in hand, learning the news of this "coincidence" at the same time as you. He's probably wondering who this mystery friend is. I'm expecting a call any moment. I can't wait to share with him about the wonderfully woven web of impact he's created. 

While John is pretty awesome, he's just a man. He's a normal guy making extraordinary impact. However, there's nothing extraordinary about his work. He simply serves people, loves them, meets them where they are, and uses whatever gifts and passions he's been blessed with. From that quite ordinary work comes extraordinary impact. 

Without knowing it, we're all weaving our own web of impact. But not all webs are created equal. With intentionality, consistency, and a heart to make a difference, we each have the ability to create a beautifully impressive web. And someday, if we're as lucky as John is today, we'll get a tiny little glimpse at how that web is woven together. 

Break the Mold

Michael Jordan will forever be my favorite NBA player, but Steph Curry will confidently sit next to him on my Mount Rushmore of all-time favorite players. I absolutely love Curry, and my social media algorithms also know it. This was evidenced last night when I stumbled upon a gem of a video.

@crowmovie3 #fvp #foryou #basketball #stephencurry #iloveyou ♬ original sound - Crow movie

Despite wreaking havoc on some of the best teams in the country during March Madness (experts thought it was an anomaly), Curry was disrespected before, during, and after the draft. He didn't fit the mold. Nothing he did fit within the bounds of commonly held beliefs about how basketball could and should be played. They tried to put him in a box.

Curry didn't care. He didn't conform. He didn't try to be someone he wasn't. He didn't stay in the box. He simply became more of what he already was. Then, he changed the game of basketball forever. He broke the mold!

While none of us will be slinging logo threes in our day job, we have a lot to learn from Curry. Society and the prevailing culture are quick to tell us how the world works, the way things are supposed to be done, and what is (and isn't) possible. Much of my week is spent trying to help people break free from universally believed truths. These toxic ideas are pervasive and are holding people back en masse.

Our clients, podcast listeners, and blog readers often reach out to share stories. One story that's on repeat is the story about how they will share some of their decisions with friends/family/etc., only to be told they are stupid, weird, naive, or some other insult. Whenever this happens, I congratulate them. This is how we know we're on the right track. They are breaking the mold!

My decisions and ideas get insulted almost daily at this point. I was recently sitting with a group of guys when one of them said something terribly offensive to me. It was concerning me continuing to make a fraction of the income I used to when the opportunity to return to a higher income is still on the table. The other two guys agreed with this person, but were shocked and disappointed he would say something like that to my face. They asked if I was mad, and I responded that it was the ultimate compliment. I couldn't have loved it more.

Break the mold. Please break the mold. Let's collectively break the mold so much that it ultimately becomes the new mold. That's what it looks like to bend the culture.

Better Late Than Never

We published our 306th episode of the Meaning Over Money podcast yesterday. On Monday, we'll begin publishing full video episodes on our YouTube channel. Yes, it took 306 episodes and nearly three years to publish on YouTube. Even more sad is the fact our producer and Meaning Over Money co-founder, Cole Netten, is a filmmaker. This is literally his wheelhouse. Ouch! Better late than never, though.

The truth is, we've had a lot of life happen in the last three years. Cole bought a house, had two kids, and has shepherded his business to entirely new heights. My life hasn't been any less crazy. My business has evolved a ton, we launched Northern Vessel Coffee, I joined multiple boards, launched my speaking career, started contributing meaningful time to a client in Texas, and have experienced significant life change while transitioning our twin boys into their school years.

It's been a lot. Every now and then, Cole and I will lament that we're not as far along with the podcast as we'd like. We know we can reach more people and make a more significant impact, but the above reasons have diverted our attention (and time). On the flip side, we've made the choices we've made.....and we own the outcomes of those choices.

Along the journey, there were two paths we could have taken. We could have elected to wait until everything was just how we wanted it. The perfect studio. A full suite of marketing strategies across all social media platforms. Fully produced video. The possibilities are endless. If that was the route we selected, we'd still be waiting to launch the podcast.

Instead, we chose the second path: putting one foot in front of the other. It's not always pretty. It can get messy. We're leaving something on the table. But we're moving forward. 300+ episodes later, and we're still (slowly) building momentum. According to Listen Notes, we're in the top 3% of podcasts that have ever existed. That's pretty cool for a couple guys who have failed forward every step of the way.

Now, please allow me to flip it around back to you. I encourage you to NOT wait until everything is just right. Instead, whatever it is you're supposed to do, simply put one foot in front of the other. It won't always be pretty. It will surely be messy. You'll undoubtedly leave something on the table in the process. However, you'll make a difference. You'll create impact. You'll navigate (perhaps slowly) toward success. Better late than never!

Life is Short

In the span of 24 hours, I received news of three people passing away far too soon. They were in their 40s, 50s, and 60s. It was sad, and it hit a little too close to home. In the aftermath of these tragic developments, I was talking to a friend about it, and they shared a commonly-believed sentiment. I'll paraphrase: Each of these people worked their entire adult lives and died before they had a chance to actually enjoy life.

When we hear stories like this, a common takeaway is that it's proof we should hurry up and race toward retirement so we can milk a "life we actually enjoy" for as long as possible.

These types of stories impact me profoundly, but in the opposite way. It doesn't prove we should race faster to the retirement finish line. Rather, it's proof that we should live a life worth living.....today. Life is indeed short. I'm not trying to race to some finish line so that I can live my remaining years in relaxation. I'm trying to live each day, week, and month to the fullest. Not at some arbitrary point in my future, but today.

I've always had a morbid sense that I'm going to pass away too soon. I'm not sure where that thought comes from, and I'm not entirely sure if it's healthy or not. Regardless of its origin or implications, it has done one thing. It's reiterated the importance of living with meaning, generosity, and impact today. Not someday. Not when I meet certain markers or hit particular milestones. Today. This week. This month. This year.

I was on a cruise a few weeks ago. That was an awesome week.

I was out of state at a client's office last week. The days were long, and the nights were short. That was an awesome week.

I'm serving clients and attending board meetings this week. It's an awesome week.

I'll be creating a ton of content and hosting some difficult meetings next week. That will be an awesome week.

We have a mini spring break trip in a few weeks (plus March Madness). That will be an awesome week.

Life is short. Don't waste today in hopes of tomorrow. Don't destroy your working years in pursuit of an accelerated retirement. Don't disregard the blessings of hard work and struggle while glorifying a life of leisure. Life is short. Squeeze meaning from all of it.

Be Unreasonable

Last week, I attended some leadership meetings with my Texas client. On one of the days, we heard a presentation from a third-party consultant specializing in sales and culture. He brought up a point that struck me as interesting. He discussed how some organizations (especially the military) create their own language. Special terminology, new words, relevant acronyms, etc. The reasoning behind this has multiple layers:

• Using a shared language that everyone understands helps create clarity.

• It drives simplicity and efficiency.

• It helps people and teams lean into the mission at hand.

• It builds connections and relationships between the people who are in the know. 

As he was explaining this concept, I had one idea that kept popping up in my brain. It's a book called Unreasonable Hospitality. This book is the foundation for how we operate Northern Vessel. TJ, our founder, is the embodiment of this concept. He talks about the book constantly, and as a result, these concepts cloud every conversation we have (which is nearly daily). 

Now, the combination of these two ideas. I'm coining a new phrase and want you to be part of it. This is my formal invitation for you. Be unreasonable. Be unreasonable in the pursuit of meaning. Be unreasonable in the generosity we show others. Be unreasonable in our efforts to make a difference in someone's life. Be unreasonable in bucking the gravitational pull of our culture in exchange for something better. Be unreasonable. 

I'd like to think of myself as an unreasonable guy. Much of the time, I nail it. However, I've recently witnessed cracks in my unreasonableness. I'll call them deficiencies. But as I settle into this new phrase, Be Unreasonable, it will be at the forefront of each aspect of my life and business. I need to create unreasonableness in the areas I'm bleh.

I want to be unreasonable with you. If you spend part of each day reading this blog, just know I don't take that for granted. I feel a tremendous weight (in a good way) each day when I sit down to write. I deeply desire to give you something special. I want to provide you with a little 400-500 word gift that can make you smile, make you think, make you grow, and/or make you want to change this world. 

My challenge, if you choose to accept it, is to be unreasonable with people in your life. The act of being unreasonable will look different for everyone, but I encourage you to find yours. Have fun with it. Make people look at you cross-eyed. Make yourself into the weird one. Bend the culture, ever so slightly, with your circle of influence. Just be unreasonable. 

Lessons From Archie (Moonlight) Graham

Warning: This post is going to be abnormally vague for my writing. I typically try to operate with transparency and vulnerability. Today's post is a bit different. The heart behind it is completely vulnerable, but the actual idea will remain in the shadows. A few reasons: 1) I'm not ready to unveil it just yet, and 2) I want you to think about your journey, not mine.

Last night, I began embarking on a new, exciting, and terrifying journey. I'm beyond pumped for it, but it's excruciatingly uncomfortable. So much so that I didn't really sleep last night. Ideas, fears, and what-ifs were spinning around my head, and I couldn't turn it off. My anxiety and fear were in full force.

This is the tension with discomfort. Even when we know we need to do something, it's hard to follow through when the discomfort is evident. It reminds me of this scene from Field of Dreams.

Archie (Doc) Graham had one dream: get an at-bat in the big leagues. There's a lot to the story, but after hitchhiking his way to Dyersville, IA, to Ray Kinsella's farm-turned-ballfield, young Archie was living his dream. There he was, in full uniform, playing ball with some of the legends of the game. Then, the twist.

Ray's daughter Karin fell off the bleachers while eating a hot dog, causing her to choke and go unconscious. Sensing the panic, Archie turned his attention to the bleachers and jogged across the field toward the young girl. As he approached the edge of the field, he stopped. In that moment, Archie knew exactly what he needed to do. Simultaneously, he also knew how uncomfortable this moment was. He paused, and maybe even hesitated. You can cut the tension with a knife.

Then, after coming to terms with the discomfort, young Archie stepped across the line and into his destiny. He knew the sacrifice he was making by taking that step, but he also saw the bigger picture. What waited on the other side of his discomfort was something even better. He saved the young girl, and her feuding family. Despite giving up so much at that moment, you could see the peace and contentment in his eyes as he said his goodbyes and eventually disappeared into the outfield.

That movie gives my eyes allergies every time I watch it. It also holds sentimental value for me, as I lived just six miles from where it was filmed. I just wish I was old enough to have an awareness and appreciation for it back then. As we journey through life, we will encounter those Archie Graham moments. We'll walk right up to the line, then stop, because crossing it could possibly be one of the most uncomfortable and scary things we can do. It's ok to pause. Pausing doesn't define us. It's what we do after the pause that matters. Will you step across that line and into your destiny, or turn back?

I want to be like Archie.

Not All Heroes Wear Capes

I've had quite the run in the last two days. In a matter of 48 hours, here's who I had the privilege of spending time with:

• A former police officer who now dedicates his life to helping other officers and first responders who are dealing with depression and suicidal thoughts.

• A few high school teachers who have a passion for teaching their students about work, business, and professionalism. Their mission is to raise up the next generation of leaders by giving them the tools to enter the workforce with the skills, confidence, and momentum. 

• A pastor who has dedicated his life to serving others. His Sundays are spent preaching, but the other six days of the week are spent leading his team and counseling people who are hurting. 

• A business owner who started his company out of frustration from watching people get taken advantage of and ripped off. 

• A missionary with a heart to provide free medical care to people who may not have access to doctors or the necessary technology.

• A single mom who is raising four small children while also working a full-time career to pay the bills.

In other words, I met with a hero, a hero, a hero, a hero, a hero, and another hero. None of them wore capes. There were no masks. I couldn't tell, but I didn't see any utility belts being sported. They were all disguised as normal people just trying to do their jobs. 

Heroes are all around us, but not even the heroes know they are heroes. That's actually what makes them heroes. They aren't trying to get notoriety, praise, or compliments. And they certainly aren't trying to get rich. They are just using their gifts and passions to serve others with excellence, day in and day out. 

Maybe you're a hero and don't even know it. I hope you are, and I thank you for your service. You probably don't get enough credit for your heroism, so please consider this my formal "thank you" to start your day. I hope I'm not the only one who gives you the credit you deserve. 

Not all heroes wear capes. Please don't forget that today.

Here to Serve

Inspiration comes from the darndest places. As I was sitting here contemplating what to share today, I received a text from my often-discussed corporate client in Texas. As usual, they have interesting developments brewing and like to bounce scenarios and questions off me for my input. Some of their questions require quick and simple answers, while others require many hours of detailed contemplation and analysis. This request was of the quick and simple variety.

I told them to respond with any follow-up questions they might have, as I'm just preparing today's blog and can help however needed. One of the gentlemen jokingly responded that I should "write about people who constantly ask you to do things that you have given them the tools to do themselves and how annoying that is."

That's precisely what I will do, but I will pull a 180 on him. There is nothing annoying about this exchange whatsoever. In fact, it's a privilege and an honor. The fact my insights and expertise are desired and valued is something I never take for granted. Further, the opportunity to add value to their decision-making and overall business is a tremendous blessing. No part of me is even remotely annoyed by this. I should be sending him a thank you card for allowing me the opportunity and blessing to serve him. I'm beyond grateful.

We are here to serve. Simply put, this is the base calling in our life. We can, of course, choose to ignore it, refuse it, or turn our back on it. From the moment we wake up until we go back to bed, our day is a never-ending string of serving opportunities. Our spouse, kids, co-workers, clients, customers, neighbors, and even strangers. Nearly every interaction in our life is an opportunity (or, dare I say, duty?) to serve others.

Think about the people in your life you're attracted to. No, not that kind of attraction. The kind of attracted that you want to be in their presence. The kind that makes you want to spend time with them. The kind that makes you want to be more like them. Chances are this person is a servant. Chances are one of the primary attributes that make you (and probably others) attracted to them is their willingness and heart to serve others.

I could most certainly wake up each day with the objective of getting what I want for myself. That option is on the table. In fact, I know a lot of people who live this way. This is just one man's opinion, but that feels like an empty-calorie type of life. It might taste good for a bit, but it's anything but satiating.

The posture of service, on the other hand, is an immensely fulfilling way to live. We might not always get what we want by continually serving others, but we actually get something better: meaning, impact, and purpose. That's the irony of service. We get fed by feeding others.

“Wow, That’s Embarrassing”

A young business owner recently reached out to me. He wanted to chat over coffee. Never turning someone down for a coffee, I immediately agreed. We talked about life, work, family, and business. He revealed some of his goals and dreams, and surprisingly commented, "I'd like to be successful like you one day." He followed that up by talking about how he'd like to "make bank" to drive nice cars, sport luxury watches, and build the house of his dreams. There's a reason I shared his comment and this context.....you'll see in a moment. Toward the end of the conversation, he asked if I'd be willing to mentor him.

As we worked our way out the door and into the parking lot, we shared a few more pleasantries before parting ways. We were standing next to an older Nissan Altima with a massive ugly dent on the driver-side doors. As it caught his eye, he pointed and quipped, "Wow, that's embarrassing."

After we shook hands, he walked to his car, and I got into the heavily dented Altima. Part of me wanted to take a lap past his car to give him another glance at this embarrassing dent, but I refrained. I still don't know if he eventually realized he was insulting me.....maybe one day I'll ask him (or send him a picture of me posing next to my car like a magazine model).

The brutal dent is the result of an accident I experienced about 18 months ago. I was coming home from a negotiation meeting where my Northern Vessel business partners and I were hammering out the details of our ownership structure. A young teen driver was driving right next to me in the left lane, when he decided to change lanes without looking. He was scared and embarrassed, but everything turned out ok.

Immediately after the accident, I was in a tizzy about fixing the damage ASAP. I caught myself feeling this way and wondered why. I quickly realized it was because some part of me cared about what others thought (like the young man who thought my car was embarrassing). However, I quickly came to my senses and remembered I don't actually care about things like that.

Still, I took my car to the shop for an estimate and submitted it to insurance. Instead of having me send my car to the shop and pay for the work, the insurance company just sent me a check and called it "closed."

After I deposited the check, I had a decision to make. I could either a) repair the cosmetic damage and make sure people have a proper perspective of who I am, or b) do something else with the money. I ultimately chose to give the money away. My car looked like crap, but a bunch of kids got fed. I call that a win.

For the last 18 months, I've elected to keep the dent as a reminder of what's most important. Some see embarrassment, but I see beauty.

The Randomness of Impact

Okay, campers, rise and shine, and don't forget your booties, 'cause it's cold out there today. It's cold out there every day. What is this, Miami Beach?...............That's right, woodchuck-chuckers - it's GROUNDHOG DAY!

Groundhog Day is one of my all-time favorite movies. I've probably seen it 50-100 times over the last 30 years. To this day, I can't put my finger on why I love it so much. Maybe it's the fantasy of the concept. Maybe it's the humor. Maybe it's the nostalgia. Maybe it's the colorful characters (Bing!).

Regardless of the reason, it just stuck with me. It's not the best movie in the world. Heck, it's not even Bill Murray's best movie. But it stuck! That's the wild part about putting our ideas and art into the world. The one we think will be a hit can flop, and the ones we don't give much thought to can stick.

If I had a dollar for every podcast episode or blog I felt self-conscious about but absolutely stuck, I'd have a lot of dollars! There are some days when I second-guess hitting "publish." There are some days I prepare myself to feel embarrassed by my work. There are some days I feel like I'm just letting you down. But oddly enough, those days are often the ones that garner the most replies, shares, and conversation.

Self-talk is a thief. It can be the one thing that robs the world of something special. One doubtful moment can steal the impact you were meant to have on someone else.

It's like hockey. Not all shots are going into the net, but the more shots we put up, the better our chance of scoring. That's one thing I've learned about publishing two podcast episodes and seven blog posts per week. Not all of them will score......but some will! The secret is having the courage to keep showing up each day. Shot, after shot, after shot. Some will miss, but some will result in a glorious goal!

Don't lose hope when your shots aren't going into the net. Rather, know it's just the frustrating process of creating impact. Your purpose is far too great to let a couple of missed shots take you out of the game. Keep going…..you got this!

BING!

You Are Where You Are

When I’m sitting with someone and begin talking about their finances, one of the first things they reveal is a regret they haven’t done better. This usually comes out as frustration from past mistakes, a track record of unintentionality, a comparison to someone doing better financially, or an acknowledgment that they have some knowledge gaps regarding money. We all carry some combination of this. Money is a deeply personal topic, and most of us have some wounds (or scars).

I always have the same message. We are where we are. None of us are where we wish we were, but we also can’t jump into our Delorian to go back in time for a do-over. While that’s a sad reality, it can also be freeing. If there’s literally nothing we can do about the past, we have the opportunity to put 100% of our focus on the present and future.

I’m waking up in Los Angeles today, on the heels of a talk I gave last night. It’s a gang prevention program for parents and teens, with each night having a different topic. This is the third cohort I’ve worked with in this program, and the focus of my talk is helping families get a better grasp and perspective on their finances. You might be wondering what my ideas and topics have to do with gang prevention, and I wouldn’t blame you. One of the reasons young adults join gangs is the pressure to help their financially struggling family. The objective of my talk is to help families alleviate some of their financial tension (through better stewardship), so their kids don’t feel the financial pressure to go down the gang route.

After my talk, three separate people approached me and voiced their frustration with themselves over past (and current) financial decisions. My response: “You are where you are. Tomorrow is a new day, and I believe you can move the needle in the right direction.” We went on to discuss a few nuances specific to their individual journeys. I wanted them to leave that room with optimism, confidence, and most importantly, grace (to their past selves). They are where they are, but the future is wide open.

Wherever you are, no matter your mistakes, and regardless of what others around you are doing, you got this! Maybe you’re deeply in debt. Maybe you’ve failed to invest in your future. Maybe you’re living in a house/apartment you can barely afford. Maybe you bit off more than you can chew with your choice of vehicle. Maybe you messed up at work and lost your job. You are where you are. There’s no way around that. But today is a special day. Today is the day you have the opportunity to unwind past decisions, reassess where you’re trying to go, and make new decisions. There’s no day like today!

Why Not You?

I've been an Iowa State Cyclone football fan since first stepping on campus 24 years ago. Confession: It's not always easy. We don't usually have stellar teams, and when we do, they end up underperforming expectations. Such was the case a few years ago when we were blessed by friends who purchased season tickets for our family.

While that season was full of amazing family memories and new traditions, the actual on-field performance was frustrating. We had a talented squad, tons of hype, and seemingly all the tools to get into the top 10. We had a four-year starter at quarterback, and he had a ton of weapons around him (including starting NY Jets running back Breece Hall). However, it wasn't meant to be.

Our quarterback's name was Brock Purdy. On a personal level, I thought he was a class act....a top-notch character. But as a player, it felt like he hit his ceiling in his sophomore year. So when it was announced he would try to make an NFL roster, I thought it was pretty far-fetched. The San Francisco 49ers selected him with the very last pick in the draft, which is commonly referred to as "Mr. Irrelevant." That was pretty cool, though! I never expected him to get drafted, yet there he was.

But would he ever even take a snap? Due to a few unfortunate injuries, he rose from third on the depth chart to eventually starting by default. And he won. Then he won again. And again. He just kept winning. By the end of the regular season, he was getting Rookie of the Year mentions and was solidly their starter for the playoffs. Again, he shined in the playoffs.....until he experienced a sad season-ending injury.

As this season approached, would he be physically ready to play? Even if he was, would he be their starter? Yes, he was ready, and yes, he did get the starting job. Then he just continued winning.....so much so that he was in the league MVP conversation for most of the season.

Last night, he became an NFC champ, and he's leading his team to the Super Bowl, where he'll face a KC Chiefs dynasty that's making their 4th Super Bowl appearance in 5 years.

Not many people (me included) believed in Brock Purdy. Yet, here he is. Here's the question I have today. Why not Brock Purdy? Better yet, why not me? Or better still, why not you?

Here's one thing I do know. If Brock Purdy didn't believe in himself, he wouldn't be here. He had the entire world trying to give him a participation trophy, but he knew something we didn't.

I think about people like him a lot. Why not them? Why not me? Why not you? It reminds me of a famous quote: "Whether you think you can or can't, you're right."

Whatever your thing is, just go for it! Sure, you might fail....or you might not. It could be nothing....or everything. Why not you?

The Powerful Undercurrent of Culture

Culture is a weird thing. We notice it when it's spectacular, we notice it when it's terrible, but otherwise, we typically don't think much about it. Nearly every aspect of our life is ruled or influenced by culture. We don't usually consider it because it just exists. We watch those who come before us, and we absorb the culture. Once we've absorbed it, we continue to pass it along to others. 

Holding the door open for others, saying please and thank you, yielding to the person who got to the intersection first, and leaving a tip for the server. These are all cultural rules we've learned, absorbed, and passed on, whether we realize it or not. 

Much of our culture has been established, passed down, and slowly evolved for generations. In other situations, however, culture must be created. When we opened the doors at Northern Vessel 14 months ago, we had a choice to make. We could allow the prevailing culture to take over or intentionally curate our own culture. We chose the latter. We spent (and still spend) more time with our staff talking about culture than on drink preparation. The culture is everything. The culture begins with the staff. Once they portray the culture, it's absorbed and passed along to others. 

Speaking of, we also needed to establish the culture of a Northern Vessel guest. Where do you order? Where do you wait for your order? How do you use the space to best suit your style and needs? Where do you get water? Where do you put your dirty dishes? All of these are small components of culture. In the first few weeks, I and a few others planted ourselves in the guest area, practicing the desired culture for others to absorb. Within a matter of days, guests had absorbed the culture and were passing it along to others. Today, between our amazing staff and hundreds of loyal guests, the culture is deeply seeded.

Cruise ships have an interesting dilemma. It's like a wild science experiment. Put 5,000 guests (from all over the world speaking many different languages) on a boat simultaneously, lock them there for a week, send them packing simultaneously, and then do it again. We aren't talking about slowly building the culture of a coffee shop for hundreds of people over the course of months. It's creating a culture for 5,000 people in a matter of hours. What a challenge!!!

Royal Caribbean executes it brilliantly:

• They lean into their staff (3,000+ of them!?!?) to drive culture. It all starts with them. They are highly trained.

• Communication, communicaiton, communication. From signage, to the PA announcements, to the programming on the in-room TVs, they are constantly communicating desired outcomes. 

• They leverage their loyal, returning guests. They are grateful for returning business, but also know these guests will pass along the culture.

No matter our role(s) in life, we have two choices: intentionally curate and/or bend culture, or simply absorb the prevailing culture (for better or worse). 

This Can’t Be Everything

We had another amazing day at sea yesterday, which included a few hours in port in Falmouth, Jamaica. Lots of food, lots of swimming, and lots of adventures. This trip has been THE definition of relaxation (well, except for everything that goes into caring for two first graders). It's been absolutely wonderful, and I'm so very grateful for our opportunity to go on this trip together.

As I was in the hot tub yesterday afternoon, I overheard a group of twenty-somethings next to me. They, too, were thoroughly enjoying their cruise. One asked the others, "Wouldn't it be great just to live like this all the time?" They all agreed and started fantasizing about a life of perpetual relaxation, endless drinks, and a non-stop flow of delicious food.

I agree with them about how amazing this experience is, but I couldn't disagree more about making this life. This isn't life. This is something we do once in a while. This is a treat. It's a reward. It's a little luxury. But it's not a life. This can't be everything.

I can't wait to jump back on a cruise ship again one day, but I would never want it to be my life. There are too many more meaningful and impactful things we must accomplish. We can't live a life solely for ourselves. That's a purposeless and empty existence.

While we're on the subject, I can't wait to get back home and back to work. It's going to be wonderful. I have so many thoughts, ideas, and dreams that are ready to be unleashed. Stuffing it all down while I continue to live a life of leisure would be the selfish thing to do.

So I'm going to enjoy the heck out of these last few days, be excited to get back into the swing of work and life, and maybe even plan another vacation for the not-too-distant future.

Find ways to get away, relax, and live in temporary leisure. It's healthy for us, and it's a ton of fun. Go book that trip! But also know it's not everything. It can't be everything. We must find meaning and purpose, and lean into them each day.