You Aren't Alone

On August 7th, at a client's request, we published a podcast episode titled "Making Financial Progress While Inflation is Kicking Your Butt." In it, I shared a common experience many families across our country are going through. Inflation is doing a number on us. For millions of families, the inflation we've experienced over the past few years has eroded most (or all) of the financial margin they've managed to create. It's scary, frustrating, and defeating.

This week, I spent time with this client for the first time since that episode went live. They jokingly asked if that episode had gone viral. While it hasn't necessarily gone viral, at least 15-20 people have mentioned that specific episode to me. Comments such as, "that hit a little too close to home," "I'm glad I'm not the only one feeling this way," and "I feel like you understand what we're going through."

All this feedback illustrates an important and powerful point. We aren't alone. While we often feel like we're dealing with genuinely unique circumstances, they are often slight variations of what others are experiencing. I say this to highlight the fact you aren't alone. If true, there are a handful of implications:

• You don't have to go through it alone.

• If others can do it, so can you!

• If others have done it, there are resources to learn and grow.

• Success isn't possible.....it's probable. We just need to keep moving forward. 

• There will be people who try to tear you down with a victim mentality.....

• .....but there will be people who try to encourage and support you.

I've experienced this first-hand over the past 15 years. When we were deeply in debt, I realized millions of others were as well. When I wanted to start a business, I realized millions of others had already gone down that road before me. When we struggled with fertility issues, I realized millions of others struggled as well. When we lost a child, I realized millions of others were also dealing with a similar pain. I wasn't alone, and neither are you.

With that in mind, don't be afraid to be open with others. With honesty comes support, and with support comes progress. Oh yeah, and never hesitate to hit me up if you need anything. I'd be honored to help. You aren't alone, and that's a beautiful thing. 

"Never Again!!!!!"

One of my clients just paid off a ton of credit card debt. It’s a debt they’ve had off and on for the better part of two decades. Now, after about a year of intense work and dedication, it’s gone! When I asked them how it felt to have it finally paid off, they didn’t react with excitement or enthusiasm. Instead, they looked disgusted. “Never again!!!", exclaimed the wife. It was as if years of frustration were let loose in that moment.

“Never again.” That moment represented a lot of different things to that couple. For me, it felt like a turning point. History has repeated itself multiple times for them over the years. Debt, pay off, debt, pay off. This time, however, feels different. They know better is waiting for them. They now have the tools to move past the debt and never let it haunt them again. They have a bigger purpose and the hunger to pursue it.

This idea applies to many areas of our life, money included. Sometimes we’re not ready until we’re ready. If we’re not ready, there’s almost nothing we can do to get it right. But if we are ready, there’s almost nothing that can stop us. If it goes the way I think it will, this will be the launching point of many good things to come for their family. I will always remember my “never again” moments (there were several), and I suspect they will, too.

Three important things happen when we reach this moment:

1) We prove to ourselves that anything is possible.

2) We prove to ourselves it’s never too late.

3) We model for others a better way. If we can do it, so can they.

It changes our lives, as well as the lives of other people around us. How cool is that?!?! Powerful stuff! Let’s get to work.

Permission to Push Pause

I love it when people gain traction in their finances. They know what they are trying to accomplish, they get intentional, they make sacrifices, and they execute. It’s a beautiful thing. There’s a sense of satisfaction, confidence, and accomplishment that comes from such an experience.

But then, life happens! A job change, a wedding, a baby, a relocation, a career shift, a medical emergency, a new small business idea, kids college……the list goes on and on. These things are the very definition of life. There’s nothing linear about life. It’s a series of twists and turns, tragedies and delights, anxiety and confidence, sadness and joy.

While on a financial journey, especially if we’re really locked in and making progress, it can be easy to get fixated on the financial matters. After all, financial progress is a good thing. However, it can’t be the most important thing. If our finances become the most important thing, we’ve lost the game. Our finances should serve our life, not the other way around.

For that reason, you have permission to push pause. When life happens, we need to give ourselves permission to push pause on the finances and address the life in front of us. No guilt, no regrets, no second-guessing. Yes, this money stuff is important…….but the other things are more important.

I have multiple clients that have pushed pause on some of their financial endeavors so they can focus on life. Some of the best things life has to offer, and some of the worst things life has to offer. The highest of highs, the lowest of lows, and everything in between. In each of those scenarios, they needed to push pause for a season. Not forever…..just for now. It was hard at first, but their finances serve their life, not the other way around.

* This idea was given to me by my dear friend Tracy. If you have ideas for future blog posts or podcast episodes, I’d love to hear them!