Ready to Jump Back In

I hope you had a wonderful 4th of July yesterday. We had a blast. We spent the day in my hometown, which is known for its epic July 4th celebration. The day was jam-packed with fun events, tasty food, and, of course, fireworks. We're heading home later today, and I'll be attending the wedding of a former youth group kid tomorrow. To summarize, this is a pretty awesome weekend.

All that said, I'm ready to jump back into work. I have lots of good things in store next week, and I'm excited to get going. Truth is, I feel this most weeks. Even when I'm having the best weekend, I'm simultaneously looking forward to work. It's an odd and understandably counter-cultural reality.

Considering that 70% of Americans dislike or hate their jobs, it's obvious that most people don't have a similar perspective. The majority of people crave Fridays, dread Mondays, and find Sunday afternoon the most depressing time of the week. I'm fully aware of these dynamics and have spent time in this camp.

On the flip side, there's a growing number of people in my life who are pursuing a different sort of reality—the type of reality that allows them to enjoy their weekends and vacations but be equally excited to get back to work.

This is a hot take, but I believe this is a reality that everyone can have. I take a lot of flack for saying things like that, but I truly believe it. Work can have meaning. Work should have meaning. That doesn't mean work should replace our personal life in terms of fulfillment and meaning, but rather add to it. We don't have to choose one or another......we can (and should) have both.

Someday, when I'm gone (hopefully a long time from now), I hope one of the legacies I leave behind is this: the conviction, confidence, and commitment people have to pursue work that matters. This is one of my greatest purposes. There is no more fulfilling endeavor for me than to help people find the path of meaning—not meaning in their personal lives, but meaning... period. No matter what I accomplish, watching someone shift gears and fully pursue the life they were meant to live is the ultimate high.

If you're reading this and feel excited about what you'll be doing next week, congrats! That's a massive win, and I'm so encouraged by that. If you feel anything but excited about what's to come on the other side of this long holiday weekend, just know better is out there. I sincerely hope you gain the conviction, confidence, and commitment to find it. It's a difficult pursuit, but so, so worth it.

Embracing Freedom

We have a lot of issues here in the United States. We're far from perfect. There's tension, strife, political unrest, and economic tensions. It's safe to say we have our fair share of problems. However, despite all that, this is a pretty special place. I've spent time in 25 different countries over the past 18 years, dating back to an England/Ireland trip with my friend Eric in 2006. I've been to most of Europe, the majority of the Middle East, Central America, and several SE Asian countries.

Every country I've visited has provided me with a unique perspective. There are so many beautiful places, filled with amazing people, wrapped in fascinating cultures around the world. Simultaneously, every time I travel abroad, I'm reminded of the uniqueness and beauty of our own country. Most notably, our freedom. It's easy to take it for granted, but wow, it's something worth embracing. So yeah, we have problems, but we shouldn't forget that we also have something special here. Today, we celebrate the freedom that we share together.

Within each of our own lives, we also have a different kind of freedom available to us. It's the kind of freedom that stems from healthy financial stewardship, avoidance of debt, and the refusal to pursue a materialistic life. Our society's culture of stuff, money, and status has the power to entrap us. But it's a choice. We each have the power to choose our own path.

Some of you have chosen the path of freedom. You have made sacrifices, humbled yourselves, practiced discipline, and established values different from what our culture pushes down our throats. Congrats to you! It's a difficult path, but if you've tasted it, you know just how amazing it can be.

If you haven't chosen freedom (yet), perhaps now is the time. It's never too late to change course. Even if you've driven down the worldly road for decades, you still have a choice. The fork in the road is still in front of you.

Happy 4th, everyone! I hope you celebrate our freedom today, while also embracing a different kind of freedom.

Stumbling Into Memories

I had a weird and fun experience last night. I made a quick 24-hour trip to Omaha for a few meetings. On a quick fuel stop en route to my destination, I booked a hotel room so I would have a place to land when I got there. It's a hotel we've stayed at before. I knew what I was getting, which was good enough for me. As I pulled my car up to the main door to check in, I noticed a surprising number of people walking around wearing college gear. That's when it dawned on me, "Oh yeah, I think the College World Series is going on right now." Then it dawned on me that the CWS is immediately across the street from my hotel….Awesome! Then, after a quick Google search, I realized last night was THE final game of the tournament. Championship round, best of three games, Tennessee and Texas A&M tied 1-1. Holy cow! The final game of the CWS was taking place in mere hours, mere feet from where I was sleeping. 

A view of the stadium from the front door of my hotel

Yes, I was tired. Yes, I was hoping to take it easy. Yes, I had work to do. Yes, the heat index was 112 degrees. Yes, I had an early wake-up time the next morning. But when we stumble into memories, we must seize them! I jumped into the SeatGeek app and found the cheapest ticket available ($53). Two hours later, I was watching the final game of the CWS (in which the Tennessee Vols won their first-ever national championship). Unreal!

As I always say (which is a tribute to my friend Gary Hoag), the two best investments in life are mission and memories. Sometimes, we need to intentionally create memories; other times, we stumble into them. However, we must do one thing when we stumble into them: say "yes." There were a million reasons I wanted to decline. This wasn't part of my plan. I wasn't prepared. Did I mention the heat index was 112 degrees?!?!? But that's how some of the best memories go down. My "yes" or "no" decision was the gateway to determining my fate. I ultimately said "yes," and I'm so glad I did. I experienced something I never thought I would. I wish my friends or family were with me, but it was an amazing experience. 

It was a perfect combination of a little luck, a wise "yes*," and a $53 financial investment. One of the biggest bargains of my life. 

I hope you're intentional about creating memories along your journey, but I also hope you say "yes" when you stumble into them as well. Oftentimes, those are the most special ones. Don’t miss those blessed opportunities to add richness to your life.

*I originally said "no" about 4 times, then almost said "no" AFTER buying my ticket, then almost said "no" mid-game (3rd, 4th, 5th, and 6th innings) due to the extreme heat and sun. But I didn't! I honored my "yes" and I was rewarded handsomely for it.

But at What Cost?

Despite repeatedly writing and talking about materialism and the risks of pursuing more, I'm also human. I got bit by the jealousy bug last night! The boys were invited to swim at a friend's house, which was quite thoughtful of the host family. When I arrived to drop them off, I was met with the backyard pool of all backyard pools. Wow, this thing was stunning: waterslide, basketball hoop, tons of seating, an outdoor living room (with a massive TV), a built-in kitchen.....the whole works! Just the pool area alone probably cost more than my house is worth. My immediate reaction was jealousy.

Then, as I always do, I took a step back and looked myself in the proverbial mirror. We all have choices. Do I really want that pool? Do I really want that house? Is that what I really want? If so, why am I not pursuing it? If having xyz is so important, I should react and act accordingly.

Then, I ask myself one more question: "But at what cost?" For every decision or pursuit, there's a cost. There's no free lunch. For every dollar we spend on one thing, there's one less dollar to spend somewhere else. For every hour invested in something, there's one less hour to invest elsewhere.

So, I suppose I could endeavor to have a house with a pool like theirs. That's on the table. But at what cost? Here are a few costs off the top of my head:

• I'd probably need to use most (or all) of the liquid savings we built for other purposes.

• I'd probably be forced to abandon my current career path in exchange for a higher-paying job that would support the necessary house payment.

• Our generosity would probably fall off a cliff.

• We would probably lose the flexibility and freedom our current life structure provides.

• We'd probably lose the ability to freely travel like we do now.

When I look in the mirror and ask myself the "but at what cost?" question, that pool suddenly doesn't feel as appealing as it did in the moment.

It's not a matter of IF we will get bit by the jealousy bug, but WHEN. It's going to happen. As such, we must be ready to face it head-on. That's where the "but at what cost?" question can be so handy.

I don't have any negative feelings towards people who do things that make me jealous. After all, they are simultaneously making decisions that have their own costs. That's what makes all of this so personal. We each have choices to make.

It's not about making THE right choice. Instead, we should each pursue the right choice for us. The right choice for you and the right choice for me.

I know I'll get jealous again, but when I do, it will be another opportunity for me to look in the mirror and ask myself if I'm truly pursuing the life I'm meant to live. That's a gift!

It’s Just 22 Words

“We are born with nothing, and we die with nothing, yet we spend our lives trying to accumulate as much as possible.”

This quote has lived rent-free in my head for years. Although it's just 22 words, it has the weight of a full-fledged book or a TED talk. It drips with irony and is saturated with consequence.

I typed out several now-deleted paragraphs below, sharing my perspective on the matter. However, I don't think my perspective is relevant today. Instead, maybe a better use of your two minutes is to ponder your perspective and, more importantly, its implications on your journey.

Have a great Saturday!

When Our Possessions Possess Us

A weird thing happened to me yesterday. As I was going about my perfectly normal work day, I received a text from Sarah with this photo:

Ouch! Due to high winds, a large branch snapped off our front yard tree, and it found a new home squarely on my car's hood. Ouch again. That's actually not the weird part, though.

After receiving Sarah's text, I immediately drove home to remove the branch and assess the damage. There's a nice dent exactly where you'd expect from looking at the picture, plus some other scratches. Here's the weird part: I had zero emotional reaction. Zilch. It didn't move the needle for me whatsoever. It was an interesting development.

In the hours that followed, I pondered this weird response. Here's where I landed: I possess my possessions, not the other way around. It's just a car—just a thing. A handful of years from now, it will be in a landfill, a distant memory.

This perspective is a deviation from where I used to be. In years past, this situation would have angered and frustrated me. Why? Because my possessions possessed me. I was there to serve them, covet them, treasure them, and put them on a pedestal. That's how materialism works. That's the natural end game when we pursue a life of more.

I'm not pleased with a fresh dent in my car. I'd prefer it didn't happen. But this dent will not deter me, frustrate me, or derail me. Similar to how I handled my last car damage debacle, I suppose I'll just keep my eye on the prize and not allow it to alter my mission. It's a weird but welcomed reality in my little world.

It's an odd place to be, considering where I came from. I don't know whether I should be proud of myself for this development.....or concerned. However, since it's a 180-degree turn from our prevailing culture, I'll assume it's a good thing. I now possess my possessions; my possessions don't possess me. I care for them, treat them with respect, and honor the fact I traded hard-earned income for them, but they will not define me or drive me. That's a win worth celebrating.

What about you? Do you possess your possessions, or do they possess you?

Today’s a Great Day For a Check Mark

One of my seven-year-olds, Finn, recently handed me a piece of paper. It was a list of items with little squares to the left of them. "What's this, bud?" "This is my bucket list." Uhhhhhh, my seven-year-old has a bucket list? Curious, I asked him if he knew what a bucket list even was. "It's all the things I want to do before I die!" Alrighty then, I guess he did know.....that's a bit morbid The subsequent two sentences out of his mouth were what got me:

"Can we check a few of these off the list this weekend? We better get started."

I didn't know whether to be concerned or impressed; I decided to be impressed. Here he was, with his entire life in front of him, ready to live life now. Not someday. Not down the road. Not when he grows up. Today!

Wow, there's something profound about this idea. We adults continually kick the can down the road. "When I retire." "When the kids are gone." "When I have $x dollars." "When I get promoted to abc title." "After I accomplish xyz." "When I'm not as busy." "When ________." We always have an excuse not to do things. There are a million reasons why today isn't the day. Someday. One day. Eventually. Down the road. Confession: I could jot down a list of 20 items that I've wanted to do for decades, but just never got around to it.

You know what I think? I think today is a great day for a check mark. Why not get out there and knock something off your list? Why not treat today like a special day that should be embraced and milked for whatever it could be? Why not intentionally pursue meaning and do things that add value to our lives? Why not cut through the noise and the busy of life, and carve out time to make a memory?

"Wise" isn't a word I'd typically use to describe Finn (he's a nut), but I think he's on to something.

We better get started.

The Arms Race of Materialism

We have an arms race on our hands. It's a sexy, intoxicating endeavor: the violently aggressive pursuit of more. Bigger houses, newer cars, grander trips, trendier clothes. More, more, more. The problem with more is that every time we get more, more is still more. Ironically, it's an unwinnable race.

I recently met with a young couple who wanted some guidance. I'll lay out the scenario. Both spouses have good jobs at well-respected companies. They live in a big house (their "forever home"), drive new vehicles, and go on extravagant trips (of which the photos get repeatedly posted on their various social media channels). They are the couple everyone else looks at with jealousy and/or inspiration. People wonder how they are so rich, and aspire to be as "successful" as them.

However, as I can attest from my coaching experience, it's not always as it seems. Often, when we pull back the curtain, a different story reveals itself. This couple has a monthly after-tax take-home income of about $10,000. Their house payment is around $3,000/month, and they have two car payments totaling $1,700/month. Yes, their house and cars alone absorb approximately 47% of their take-home income. That feels tight to me, and it feels tight to them. They are stressed, but "It's worth it. We worked hard. We deserve it." No regrets, though.

Now, the twist. The reason for our meeting was to discuss their next steps. What next steps, you ask? They want to buy a different house—their new "forever home." That's the thing about the pursuit of more. Every time we get more, more is still more. What's a "forever home" today is just another house six months from now. Anyway, after doing the math, we concluded that this new house will cost them about $4,200/month.

Are you scratching your head yet? They are stressed with their current $3,000/month house payment, but want to increase it to $4,200? Yes, correct. This begs the question, "Why?" It took a few minutes to get there, but I finally got the real answer. Their best friends are building a new house (i.e. better than theirs), making them want to upgrade, too. It's the arms race!

I tried to explain that more isn't the answer. Meaning over money. Living with purpose. Career flexibility. Not allowing financial stress to drive a wedge into their marriage behind closed doors. Nevertheless, they left that meeting with a burning desire to build their new "forever home."

It's easy to dismiss this couple as "crazy" or an anomaly, but they represent a growing contingent in this country. I meet with multiple families per week who are deeply invested in the arms race of materialism. People are enveloped in it.

While I generally do a good job leaving my work at work, some of these families keep me up at night. I'm terrified of what's coming. A reckoning will happen. Perhaps soon. Perhaps decades from now. But it's coming. I repeatedly see how this story ends, and it's a nightmare.

Are you caught caught up in the arms race? If so, maybe today is the day to finally lay down your weapons.

Note: This couple granted me permission to share their story anonymously. I'm not sure why, but I'm grateful they did.

I Wasn't Going to Step Over That Cob

Though it's been nearly a month, I'm still thinking about the "Don't step over cobs looking for cobs" quote from my friend Bobbi. That idea hit me hard, and it's been brewing under the surface of my life ever since. And last night, it came out in a very meaningful way.

I had a brutal day at work. It was a great day, and I was honored to serve many people, but I was toasted. I was tired, stressed, and frustrated by a few challenges I encountered along the way. When I got home, I knew I still had a bunch of work in front of me before I went to bed. Overwhelmed is the only word to describe it.

That's when the test hit me. While eating dinner, Pax asked if we could get ice cream, cruise around in the convertible, and jam out to Twenty One Pilots together. Though I had very little left in the tank, I wasn't about to step over that corn cob! We did just that. We grabbed ice cream, ate it while cruising with the convertible top down, and cranked up the new Clancy album to an annoyingly loud volume. It was, is, and will forever be a beautiful memory. Afterward, Finn, Pax, and I spent the next hour geocaching near our house (we found three treasures!).

Showing off their first find, discovered inside a tree.

It's so easy to look past life's "normal" repetitiveness. It's easy to take for granted the ordinary while dreaming about the extraordinary. It's all too common to eagerly anticipate the exotic while wading through the mundane. I could have missed last night's opportunity! In my attempt to see the day through and prepare for the next, I could have stepped over that cob while looking for more cobs. This time, luckily, I didn't.

As I look back at my life, I shudder to think about how many cobs I stepped over while looking for cobs. I was overtaken by life. In my pursuit of success, progress, achievement, money, and whatever else I was chasing earlier in my adult life, I probably missed out on so many opportunities that would have added meaning and richness to my life. If that's not accidental self-sabotage, I don't know what is.

I'm really enjoying the cobs these days, and I hope you are, too!

Randy Off the Top Rope!

I received a message from my friend Randy after a recent blog post about a couple in England who recently made drastic career shifts. Here's what he said:

"If you don't have your priorities straight, a job or career change is not going to help.  You will just be unhappy in a different place, and it could be with less income and more financial strain."

Sharp. Sharp, but true. I want to sit on this thought for today. I often get criticized for advocating that people leave their jobs and pursue work that matters. I need to clarify this perspective. I'm not actually advocating for people to leave their jobs as much as I'm advocating for people to simply pursue a life of meaning. Considering 70% of Americans dislike or hate their jobs, and we've collectively been lulled into lives of tolerance (or quiet suffering), my sentiment often seems to point in that direction.

The truth, however, is that my friend Randy is right. Change, for change's sake, provides no long-term meaning, satiation, contentment, or fulfillment. Without truly understanding our priorities or how we define a meaningful life, a career shift isn't the remedy we're looking for.

For many of us, and I think Randy's career testimony would be a perfect representation of this, we're already in meaningful jobs. However, if we're pursuing everyone else's definition of success, status, and winning, we might lose sight of what actually matters to us. I'll give you an example.

One of my clients was discontent with his job. He felt frustrated and bored. He looked around and saw his co-workers being promoted to "more important positions." While he was good at his work, he started feeling like it was beneath him. He was impatient and fidgety. He started waking up every day with a slight dread about his day. In other words, he joined the 70% club. As we started talking about it, however, he realized something. When he was able to set his jealousy of co-workers aside, stop worrying about status, and remember why he took this job in the first place, his perspective shifted. He realized the following:

• He was dang good at his job, and used his skills to benefit many people.

• He believes in the mission of the organization.

• His current role allows him to find a healthy balance between work, marriage, and parenting responsibilities. His lifestyle was exactly what he wanted.

• He made a solid income that allowed his family to pay for needs, give sacrificially, afford some fun things/experiences, and save for future wants/needs.

• He has many valuable relationships with co-workers and clients alike. He cherishes these relationships.

• His office is near his house, offering an amazing commute.

In other words, he was living in misery while working a job that's perfect for him. Because he didn't have his priorities straight, as Randy points out, no change was going to save him. However, after realizing what's truly important, he understands he's truly blessed.

Perspective matters! Clear priorities matter, too!

750 Sessions, Oh My

I had a wild realization yesterday when meeting with my assistant, Alyssa. We were updating our client tracking spreadsheet when something caught our eye. After accounting for May's meetings, I have conducted 750 coaching sessions since leaving my prior career in 2019. This doesn't include consultations, touchpoints, one-off meetings, or providing insights to non-clients—750 formal coaching sessions with clients. I initially thought that was an error, but nope (!), it's the real deal.

While every family's situation differs, some consistent and common themes repeatedly pop up. This was never more evident than one day when I had back-to-back coaching meetings. The first was with a first-year elementary teacher trying to carve her path into adulthood. The second was with an NFL player who recently signed an eight-figure contract while navigating multiple endorsement opportunities. I think you and I would agree these two individuals live in entirely different worlds. Here's the thing, though. I had nearly the exact same conversation with both of them. That's the wonder of the human experience and our psychological wiring. While life presents differently for each of us, we often experience similar situations, challenges, and obstacles. It's a beautiful and ironic reminder that money is NEVER about money.

So today, I thought it would be appropriate to share with you 10 insights from my first 750 coaching sessions:

1. Debt does not discriminate based on income. It's not the lack of income that leads us into debt, but rather our decisions. Debt is a trap that's crushing people from every age, race, income, education, profession, and geography.

2. A family's ability to make progress in any area of life is only limited by their belief in the outcome and their discipline to see it through. Countless people have achieved feats that make my accomplishments look like child's play. Never underestimate the power of someone crazy enough to believe it's possible.

3. Combining finances in marriage always yields better results. Better financial results. Better relational results. Better alignment of meaning and purpose. Better execution of the plan. I'll die on this hill. Yes, we can do ok with separate finances, but it's like driving a five-speed car and only believing there are three gears. That third gear feels fast if we don't know the fourth and fifth gears exist.

4. If you pursue money, you might find it. It will be cool and exciting. But if you pursue meaning, you will absolutely find it.....and you'll likely find some money along the way. People who pursue meaning live ridiculously amazing lives. Not easy lives; amazing lives.

5. A well-executed budget is the gateway to any and every goal you want to accomplish. Once you unlock that, anything is possible.

6. Work that matters matters. You wear it in your eyes, and it leaks into every aspect of your life, whether you want it to or not.

7. People are usually doing better than they think, but they have nothing to compare it to other than social media.

8. Nothing changes lives like joyful and sacrificial generosity. Nothing! And I'm not talking about the recipient....the giver!

9. You SHOULD spend money on wants, but only those that add value to YOUR life.

10. Simplify, simplify, simplify. The simpler you make your finances, the more time and energy you can invest in living a meaningful life.

Sorry for the long post today, but it just felt right. Have an amazing day!

Drumming is a “Waste of Resources”

Holy cow! I'm overwhelmed by the number of texts, calls, e-mails, and comments from yesterday's post about Pax's live drumming debut. I'm beyond grateful for all the kind words. I'll probably package them together and store them away until I'm ready to share them with him when he gets older.

Today, though, I want to share one particular comment I received from a close-ish friend. This friend is a fellow finance guy. He's brilliant and has carved a name for himself in the world of finance and investing. Here's what he told me, "That whole thing seems like a waste of resources." Oh really? Tell me more. He continued explaining that we're getting nothing in return for this expense. Pax won't grow up to be a musician, but in the rare chance he does, he'll be poor. This newfound drumming skill won't lead to a valuable college scholarship. It's a dead-end hobby....no upside. Meanwhile, all the money we are spending on it could be invested and used to "build generational wealth" that can actually help my kids. 

This, my friends, is THE reason Meaning Over Money exists. Our finance world (and the culture around it) is impersonal, greedy, materialistic, and selfish. This entire industry is about how to get more, have more, and keep more. It's about dollars and cents. It's cold and calculated. It's a bunch of numbers on a screen, and projections splayed out on a spreadsheet. I love spreadsheets as much as the next financial weirdo, but I'm staunchly against our prevailing culture around finance. 

Meaning Over Money is just that: meaning OVER money. In the case of Finn and Pax's musical endeavors (or any other endeavor, for that matter), it's not about getting a return on my investment. For me, it's about allowing my kids the opportunity to explore the world, unearth potential passions, learn who they are, build confidence, create relationships, pursue failure, and accomplish more than they knew they had in them. That's meaning. That's purpose. That's everything. 

Please, never allow your finances to become cold and calculated. Don't lose sight of the meaning. Don't forget what's most important. Don't let the money drive you or your decisions. Yes, we need to be responsible with our finances. Yes, we need to ensure our family is taken care of. But don't forget what you're fighting for. You're worth far more than money.

“It IS Possible”

I recently received the most beautiful message from a stranger: "It IS Possible."

For a while, that's the only message I saw. You can probably guess the bewilderment I felt when I received that message from a total stranger. Luckily, another message followed. It was from a 40-something in England. He is married with two young teens. He explained that he's lived his entire career with the mindset that his primary objective is to provide as much income (and build as much wealth) as possible, and then retire as soon as possible. He was living a normal life, but it felt increasingly intolerable.

Then, he found our Meaning Over Money podcast. He said he connected with some of the stories we shared but thought our meaning over money principles sounded absurd (especially from Americans, whom he stereotypes as materialistic and money-hungry). However, the more he listened, the more he wondered if there was, in fact, a better life for him and his family.

Eventually, he did something drastic. He and his wife took a sharp turn, and both made drastic career shifts. "It was the scariest thing we've ever done. Still is." They elected to buck culture's narrative about work, money, and wealth to pursue something better. Fast forward more than a year, he said their lives have been transformed. They make a little less money, care much less about building wealth, and are leaning hard into work that matters. They also shared how their kids have noticed a shift in their attitudes, demeanor, and marriage. I loved that part, and I'm so grateful they took the time to share this amazing story with me! It IS possible!

Multiple times per week, I'm told that my ideas are far-fetched, naive, impractical, and/or dangerous. While I don't love these comments, I get it. The entire premise of living a meaning over money life is kinda crazy, and significantly counter-cultural. It's a tough pill to swallow to consider these principles may actually produce a rich and meaningful life. Deciding to jump off the hamster wheel of more is one of the scariest things ever. Even if you feel confident in that decision, nearly every area of life will make you doubt yourself. Friends, family, co-workers, movies, music, TV.....everything! I understand the odds are stacked against us here. So when someone reaches out to communicate their recent pursuit of a different kind of life, I celebrate. Just one of those messages can drown out 500 criticisms.

It IS possible to live a rich and meaningful life where you wake up each morning excited about what you're about to do—not because it's fun, but because it matters. A life that you aren't in a hurry to retire from.

If you're living such a life today, this is my virtual fist bump to you. You've already won. I don't care how much money you make, what your title is, or how wealthy you are. You won! If this isn't you, please know it IS possible.

Can’t Have the Good Without the Bad

Do you ever wish you could just wave a magic wand and get rid of all the junk that's bringing you down? The frustrations, pain, suffering, failures, and setbacks. Life would be so much easier if we could just remove the crap. Unfortunately, it's a package deal. We HAVE to take the bad with the good. It's all part of the deal. To take it a step further, we can't have the good without the bad. Without the bad, the good isn't good. The challenge is what makes the good so much sweeter. 

If you've been following along this week, we've recently had a mess of a time with Northern Vessel. The second car crash into our shop in nine months is a gut punch like no other. Further, the story behind what actually happened is getting weirder and more unsavory as the pieces come together. I still can't share details, but I will as soon as we're able. Needless to say, we're faced with monumental challenges as we work to rebuild our space, serve our customers, and ensure our team is healthy and taken care of. A big piece of me wishes I could wave my magic wand and just undo this part of our life. 

On the flip side, the good is so good. We're in a rhythm that's hard to explain. Yes, the closure of our shop hurts. We've only two months removed from having reconstruction completed from the last crash. We're finally into the groove we've always wanted......then crash! However, we aren't defined by our setbacks and the incident that recently occurred. We've been able to fulfill our obligations to LifeTime Fitness, which carries our products in the Des Moines location. Yesterday was also our weekly farmer's market. We've spent the past three weeks growing, learning, and tweaking, culminating in yesterday's affair. After watching it all beautifully come together, we sold 100 gallons of our signature oat milk cold brew latte in just over four hours. We ran out of product with about 40 minutes remaining in the market. More than 1,200 people. Nearly 5 coffees a minute for 4+ hours. The team was locked in, the lines flowed, and the vibe was right. 

Despite all the pain and suffering, it was beautiful. We can't have the good without the bad. It's a package deal. As I've spent my last week working through so many challenges in my life and businesses, I repeatedly wanted to wave my magic wand. But then, I catch myself. These are the challenges that make it all worth it. 

I think back to the $236,000 of debt I used to have. That was painful, but the beauty of working through it was so satisfying. 

I think back to my 20-year career and all the ups and downs. Some of it was painful, but that only adds to the beauty of where it's come. 

I think about all my clients who are fighting their own battles. I don't want to wave my magic wand to make their struggles go away. Doing so would rob them of the beauty of what's about to happen. 

We can't have the good without the bad. 

A Prescription For Generosity

The last few days have been quite stressful on my end. Between work obligations, travel, pain experienced by people I care about, our recent NV debacle (again), and sickness, my stress level is at 100. Needless to say, I was a mess yesterday. There's a partial cure for this type of stress, though: Generosity! Knowing I was hurting, I did exactly what I knew would help alleviate what ails me. I looked for opportunities to be generous. 

Throughout the day, I stumbled upon two opportunities to bless someone. Each was fun. Each made a difference (I hope). Each helped make me feel better. I've spent years thinking about why generosity oddly helps alleviate all sorts of troubles. Here's what I've come up with:

• When we give, we turn our focus from ourselves to someone else. 

• Science has proven that giving makes us happy.

• When we give, it's a subconscious signal that we have enough....and we'll be ok.

• Giving is a reminder of a broader calling.

No, my problems didn't magically go away. As I'm writing this, I'm still stuck with the same set of circumstances. Nothing is fixed. However, I feel peace and calm. I feel content. I see the bigger picture. It's a mess, but a purposeful mess. 

Give generosity a try. This is my formal prescription for you. When you're having a sucky day, find an opportunity to be generous. When you're stressed or overwhelmed, give. When it all feels like too much, take a moment to serve someone else. It makes a difference. 

Today is a new day! I hope it's better for me, and I hope it's better for you, too. Either way, it's also an amazing opportunity to bless someone. Keep your eyes open and your purpose clear. Have a great day!

Deja Vu, But the Worst Kind

After publishing the recent "see it through their eyes" post, I knew today's post would be about my recent Chicago Cubs game experience. The subject is deja vu, correlating Finn and Pax's first Cubs game with my own when I was their age. It was going to be a joyful, sentimental, and light-hearted piece. However, today's post is about a different kind of deja vu. 

Yesterday, shortly after publishing the blog, I received terrible news. It felt like a bad dream—deja vu, but the worst kind. A group of people stole a car and barrelled into our Northern Vessel storefront.....again. As a refresher, this exact situation played out in August 2023. Four people were struck by the car; one was moderately injured, and three mildly so. It was a horrific scene, but we're glad no lives were lost. We re-opened a few days later, but it took over seven months to fully repair the damage. We've been at full strength for the last two months, and then yesterday happened. 

I won't go into details, as the police are still investigating, but it's not a pretty story. Fortunately, nobody was hurt, but the damage was severe. We again face a potentially long road to recovery. 

There is a silver lining, though. There will be another form of deja vu present. Just like last time, we will approach the situation with optimism, gratitude, and perseverance. We will come out of it stronger, more resilient, and as unified as ever. This is a perfect representation of life. It's beautiful, but will surely be met with challenges, pain, and trials. It's not supposed to be easy, and that is what makes it all the more fulfilling. 

We're grateful to serve those we serve, and we won't lose sight of our calling. It's all part of the story, even if it's the worst kind of deja vu. 

Stay safe, stay strong, and keep moving forward. 

Seeing It (Again) Through Their Eyes

Yesterday, our family embarked on our first post-school summer trip: Chicago! Having grown up not far west of Chicago, it's a city I've been to countless times. Though I love it, it doesn't have a "new" feeling anymore. However, it's Finn and Pax's first-ever time in Chicago, and it's been a real treat so far. Sensory overload at its finest. We grabbed some Chicago-style pizza, hit a massive candy store, and walked alongside Michigan Avenue and the river. Not too shabby for our first few hours in the city.

There's something different about being present for other people's first-time experiences, especially kids. It's almost like we get to experience it for the first time again. I felt like a little kid showing off my favorite toy. It was pure joy to show the boys a city that's been part of my life for as long as I can remember.

We're staying downtown, making a pilgrimage to Wrigley, catching a Blue Man Group show, scoping out The Bean, and spending some time at the Museum of Science and Industry. We'll have Italian Beefs, hot dogs, and probably enough ice cream to make President Biden blush. It won't be an inexpensive trip, but man, we'll be investing in memories. 

I've had many profoundly memorable experiences throughout my life. Seeing the Great Wall, exploring the Mongolian wilderness, wandering the streets of Hong Kong, country-hopping the Middle East, and adventuring through Europe. All of these memories are special to me. But there's nothing more special than experiencing something through another's eyes. It's the power of community and shared experiences. It's the bonding that happens. An unspeakable connection that we know will last a lifetime. 

Investing in memories is an amazing endeavor, but doing it alongside people we care about ratchets it up to a whole new level. I made my first trip to Wrigley when I was seven years old, then proceeded to visit it at least one time per year for the next 20 years. It holds a special place in my heart. Tonight, I get to take my own seven-year-olds to their first game at Wrigley. I can't wait to invest in those memories and watch the game through their eyes. It may be my 100th trip to Wrigley, but it might as well be my first.

Parable of the Corncobs

Today's post is courtesy of blog reader Bobbi. Once in a while, Bobbi will bless me with an e-mail in reply to my daily posts. Sometimes she challenges me. Sometimes she encourages me. Sometimes she provides ideas. Recently, she shared a story that my Stepping Over Quarters post reminded her of. 

Bobbi's mom talks about how when she was growing up, they used to throw whole cobs of corn into the feedlot for the cattle. After the cattle had grazed the corn, the kids were responsible for picking up the bare cobs for use as fuel to heat the house during winter. Bobbi's mother explains that her strategy was to seek out the best cobs she could find. Her mother's response: "Don't step over cobs looking for cobs." In other words, don't disregard what's right in front of you in pursuit of what's in the future. 

That's beautiful, isn't it!?!? Man, I can't even tell you how many cobs I've stepped over in my pursuit of cobs. It's so easy to miss what's right in front of us. The future is full of wonder, optimism, and possibilities......but so is the present! If all we do is look ahead, we miss the beauty and meaning of what's right in front of us. 

Guilty as charged. You can take me to my cell, officer. How convicting. I can proudly say I've become much better in this area in the past several years, but I can still easily fall into this trap. I can expressly point out days I failed to embrace the moment, all because I was fixated on the days ahead. I regret that. Unfortunately, I can't get any do-overs. Fortunately, I can learn from my mistakes and hopefully avoid similar outcomes in the future. 

Here's my challenge today. Don't step over cobs looking for cobs. Embrace the present. Squeeze every ounce of meaning from it. Enjoy it for what it is. Tomorrow will be here soon enough. When it comes, we can enjoy that, too. 

Bobbi got me again, and today, I hope she gets you, too. Enjoy those cobs!

What Does Popcorn Smell Like?

Fun Fact: I don't have a sense of smell. I never have. It's hard to explain what that’s like. My brain can't even comprehend the basics of it. Here's an example:

Sarah: "This popcorn smells amazing!"

Me: "What does popcorn smell like?"

Sarah: "Like popcorn!"

Me: "But what does that smell like?"

Sarah: "Like warm butter." 

Me: "What does warm butter smell like?"

Sarah: "Like warm butter." 

Me: ..........

While Sarah did a terrible job explaining this concept to me, there was nothing she could have said for me to comprehend it. I don't know what I don't know, and no mere words will fill that gap for me. 

So many of the meaning over money principles are similar: obsessively pursuing work that matters, living without debt, experiences over things, giving sacrificially, among others. These concepts are easy to criticize and hard to internalize. Just like the smell of popcorn is so obvious to Sarah (and incomprehensible to me), the meaning over money concepts are obvious to me and many others (and incomprehensible to the majority of society). 

I'm not sure I'll ever experience the sensation of smell. It feels like a closed door that will never open. I don't know what I'm missing, to be honest. 

On the flip side, the door to meaning is open for all. Most people may not know what they are missing, but that's where we come in. We have the opportunity to live it out in front of people's eyes. Each day, we can show the world what it looks like to pursue meaning and take the road less traveled. It's going to look weird. It may get criticized. People may even laugh at us. Ultimately, it's worth it, and if we're lucky, it might inspire others to pursue it in their own journey. 

So Ridiculous That It’s Perfect

I just received the most random message from a friend. She shared that her partner just purchased her the most ridiculous Mother's Day gift ever imagined. She is correct. I can, in fact, confirm it's the most outlandish gift I've ever witnessed. In her message was a tongue-in-cheek question about whether this gift was a "smart financial decision." 

Of course this purchase wasn't a smart financial decision. After all, it's peak ridiculous. The obvious answer to her question is, "No," this wasn't a good financial decision. It was an absolute waste of money. It was foolish. It was irresponsible. It was non-sensical. .......

.......It was perfect! Through the lens of investing in mission and memories, he hit the nail on the head with this gift. Yes, it was ridiculous. So much so that she took time out of her day to message me about it. It's truly the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen. Yet, it was perfect. Here was my message to her:

"This is a brilliant move. The two most important things to invest in are mission and memories. And something tells me you will remember this forever. Amazing investment!"

This is why it's so important to stop obsessing about needs vs. wants. Instead, we should look through the lens of value and meaning. Does it add value? If so, it's probably a worthwhile purchase. Does it provide meaning? If so, it's probably a worthwhile purchase. Mission and memories usually fit the bill. Value, value, value. Meaning, meaning, meaning. 

Yes, my friend received the most ridiculous gift ever created. Yes, it was perfect. She will remember it forever. Heck, I may remember it forever. Do something outlandish today. Be wasteful. Be irresponsible. Make a decision that makes you scratch your head. Do something that makes other people roll their eyes. Get labeled as the weirdo. But for heaven's sake, invest in mission and memories. You won't regret it, and neither will those in your orbit. 

Happy Mother's Day!