Enjoying the Little Moments

Yesterday, while in the middle of a coaching session, the tables were turned on me. The client is a very successful business owner who is notoriously hard on herself. The conversation morphed into a discussion about how, on multiple occasions, she stopped to enjoy the little moments throughout the month. A client of hers reached a milestone. A testimonial where someone shared how much my client impacted their life. A staff member who had a breakthrough. A day when she was able to step away from the business to enjoy time with her family. Awesome little moments.

She said, “I tried to stop and just enjoy these little moments. Just soaked them in. And so should you.” So should I?!?! She nailed me. She knows me very well. That’s what happens when you spend enough time with someone. I’m not perfect. I know that and she knows that. She’s so right. In the hustle and bustle of work and life, it’s easy to just move past the moment and move on to the next thing. I do it ALL. THE. TIME.

It made me reflect on how many little moments I just let pass me by. I think back to launching our podcast. We recorded four episodes in that first sitting, then edited, then published……then we both went about our busy days. I’m not sure we took even 5 minutes to acknowledge how awesome that was. Last week was our podcast’s two-year anniversary. Neither Cole nor I recognized it or talked about it. I didn’t even talk to him or see him that day. Unless he reads this, I’m not even sure he remembered. What a shame for him and I to let that little moment pass us by.

Here’s my commitment. I’m going to try to enjoy the next little moment. Big or small, busy or not, I’m going to take a moment to soak it in. How about you? Will you try to join me by celebrating your next little moment?

Defining the Win

Later today, I’ll be coaching Finn and Pax’s 6-year-old basketball team. At this age, it’s a mess! Some can dribble, most can get the kid-sized ball up to the lowered hoop, and the defenders look lost. Even at this age, some of the kids obsess about the score. During last week’s game, I honestly don’t even know what the score was. I’m not sure it was even being kept. To me, that was completely irrelevant.

This brings to mind a crucial question I ask my clients early in the coaching journey. “What is a win?” It sounds like a dumb question, but the definition of a win can be dramatically different from person to person. In the case of my young basketball team, wins are defined as a) having fun, b) learning some basic fundamental skills, c) creating a culture of teamwork, and d) showing good sportsmanship. If these four things are accomplished, we’ve won. Keeping score and collecting wins shall come later when they get a bit older, but today we need to focus on these other wins.

Last week, I was sitting down with a new-ish client. They’ve amassed several million dollars of wealth over the past decade, and the conversation quickly went to how they could accelerate the process to garner a few million more. The elephant in the room, however, was a lot of discontentment with their careers and overall burdensome lifestyle. In the middle of this conversation, I asked again, “What do you REALLY want? What’s the real win?”

This unearthed an entirely new conversation that, instead of focusing on wealth and more, focused on being more present with their family, having the freedom to pursue more meaningful work, and waking up every day without a feeling of dread. It’s a chicken-and-egg scenario for many people. A commonly-held belief is that we need more money to create the life we want. Ironically, it’s often this pursuit of more money that creates the life we don’t want. Instead of running the race to financially create the life we think we want, we could simply take a different path and actually live the life we want….today. It’s not always that simple, but more times than not it is. Money doesn’t create meaning. Meaning creates meaning.

I guess I should answer my own question, “what is a win?” Here’s how I would answer it:

• I’m fully present for my family.

• I wake up every day knowing I’m about to do the work I’m called to do.

• I make enough money, this month, to earn the right to serve those who I wish to serve, again next month.

What’s your definition of a win?