Letting Opportunity be Opportunity

We work, work, and work some more. All the while, we’re hoping that opportunity finally comes our way. We wait, wait, and wait some more. When will it finally happen?!?! So we work, wait, work, wait, and work some more. Finally, the opportunity of a lifetime slaps us right in the face. It finally happened!!!

We’re so excited for the opportunity, and of course grateful, but instead of just saying ”yes”, the self-talk creeps in. Is this really what we want? What if we fail? Maybe it’s too much work. What if we’re too successful? If it came to us, maybe it’s not as good of an opportunity as we thought. There are probably many more opportunities where that came from. The spiral begins. This is a pattern I see with so many people, in all different industries and contexts. I wish I could say I’m immune, but I’m not.

I was recently flirting with a writing deadline on my plate. I knew I owed my Media Director a first draft, but I didn’t produce it as quickly as I should have. She waited…..then waited some more. Finally, it happened. Fun article, great feedback, mission accomplished. Next article…..the same story unfolded. That’s when my Media Director dropped a little reality bomb on me. “Travis, I have colleagues asking me how they can get their people an opportunity to write for this publication.” Crap, I knew where she was going with this. I responded with a question, “Is this your way of telling me I’m taking this opportunity for granted?” Of course I already knew the answer. It’s never fun eating a slice of humble pie, but that’s why we need to surround ourselves with good people. They will feed it to you when it’s necessary to do so.

Another example. Northern Vessel, the coffee company I co-own, has two amazing opportunities in front of it*. Either one would easily be the biggest opportunity in the four-year history of the company. These opportunities have the potential to fundamentally alter the trajectory and direction of the company forever. While I wish TJ (NV founder) would have had these opportunities sooner than now, he wasn’t ready. But today? He’s ready today! He has the team, infrastructure, technology, brand, processes, experience, systems, and products to not only embrace the opportunity, but thrive through it. Then, there’s the work. These will no doubt be some of the hardest things he’s ever done or had to figure out. To be honest, it would be really easy for TJ to say “no.” There’s no risk of failing by respectfully declining. Since these opportunities came, maybe it’s easy for him to think many more will come in the months and years to come. TJ could have easily spiraled his way out of these opportunities.

TJ is built differently, though. He knows he’s ready. He also doesn’t take things for granted. If you’ve fought, failed, climbed, and clawed through as much as he has as a business owner (many of you know exactly what I’m talking about), you need to let opportunity be opportunity. Embrace it, give it everything you got, and accept whatever comes of it. Maybe you’ll crush it….or maybe you’ll fall flat on your face. But just make sure you don’t look back and regret not simply letting opportunity be opportunity.

* I hate not being fully transparent. My apologies for having to be a bit vague on the Northern Vessel front. I have full intention of sharing in more detail when I’m able! Stay tuned.

Imposter Syndrome and the Death of Dreams

Imposter Syndrome: “when one believes that they are undeserving of their achievements and the high esteem in which they are, in fact, generally held. They feel that they aren’t as competent or intelligent as others might think—and that soon enough, people will discover the truth about them.”

As I opened my e-mail a few weeks ago, I was met with a congratulatory e-mail communicating my selection to be a speaker at a large conference. There must be some mistake! I’m not that guy. Nobody at this conference has any interest in what I have to say. They are literally going to stand up, turn around, and walk out of the auditorium. How did I con them into letting me onto their stage? They are going to regret this decision. Who do I think I am having the audacity to even pitch an event like this!?!?

Yeah, I was having a moment. To be honest, though, I have lots of these moments. Imposter syndrome can be brutal. Every day I hit “publish” on this blog, I have imposter syndrome. Every time I fire up the mic to record a podcast episode, I have imposter syndrome. Every time I sit down with a client, I have imposter syndrome.

I have great news: there is a cure…..kinda. Every time I start hearing these thoughts in my head, I temporarily set them aside, step into the work that needs to be done, and let the results speak for themselves. The first several times, that’s nearly impossible. But after a few repetitions, I realize I’m not as bad as I told myself I was. Then after a few more repetitions, I realize I’m better than I previously was. Then fast forward a lot more repetitions, I see the truth. The self-talk of imposter syndrome never fully goes away, but we learn to recognize it for what it is. A lie. An ugly lie, created by us, which we use against ourselves.

I don’t write about this topic to garner your pity. I’m writing about it because I suspect (er, I know 100%) many of you face imposter syndrome on a daily basis as well. And some of you are believing the lie. Some of you are letting this disgusting self-talk prevent you from doing the thing you know you were meant to do. As you begin your day, I want you to know it’s a lie. You can do this. Temporarily set it aside, step into the work, and let the results speak for themselves. You got this!

The Choice

I didn’t set out to plagiarize my close friend and mentor Dr. Gary Hoag’s amazing book, The Choice, when I started writing this post……but here we are. Sorry, Gary! Rather, I was contemplating a text I received from a friend this morning. After some back-and-forth regarding a few of my recent blog posts, I asked him a question: “Which topics/components do you think resonate with people?” He responded with “There’s a desire to make a difference, but a feeling that you have to either get paid to work for the man, or make a difference and be a struggling artist type.”

As I’m sitting in my office pondering these words, I look down and spot my copy of Gary’s book sitting before me (see, Gary, I am reading your stuff!!!). Two simple words in big, bold white letters, “The Choice”, scream right off the cover of the book and into my periphery. We make choices every day. We choose what to wear, what to eat, who to spend our time with, what podcasts to listen to, and what NBA superstar jersey we’re going to buy our toddlers next (just me?). But there seems to be this HUGE choice that lingers over all of us, every single day. The choice of what to do with the majority of our waking hours. The choice of how we are going to use our talents and passions to make an impact. The choice of where our life’s energy will go. Such a huge choice!

As I’m considering my buddy’s words about this choice, I thought back to a very intense conversation I had with Gary over FaceTime last year. I was teetering back-and-forth on the idea of leaving my awesome career to do something totally crazy. It was one of those days where the self-talk was thick. “What are you doing!?!” “You’re going to fail!” “Don’t be irresponsible, you can never make a living doing what you want to do.” Every insult possible was hurled my way…..by my own mean self. I did what I always do when the self-talk ramps up……I engage a trusted mentor. This was one of those I-remember-exactly-where-I-was-when-it-happened kind of moments. I distinctly remember shouting at Gary - in my doubt and frustration - “Yeah, but what I’m thinking about doing hasn’t even been legitimized. There’s no proof this will actually work.” Gary smiled and responded (too) calmly, “Only God gets to decide what’s legitimate.” Thus I started chewing on the slice of humble pie Gary was serving up, piping hot!

One of Gary and I’s many Asian adventures!!

Fast forward several months, I left my career, took a 90% pay cut, and set out to build a new career. Nine months later, I’m able to support my family financially, the business is growing, and I’m already dreaming about what’s next. I often think back to that conversation with Gary and his virtual slap in the face. He was right! Had I not listened to him, and instead listened to my self-talk and the culture around us, I would have made a different choice. I would have chosen “normal”, safe, predictable, and comfortable. Instead, I chose uncertainty, impact, trust, and purpose.

Here’s an interesting thing about this choice, specifically the two options laid out by my friend. We don’t actually have to choose between “getting paid” and “making a difference.” Though I took a 90% pay cut, there’s a legit chance I eventually get to the point where I make as much (or more) in my new career than I did in my old career. If I’m pouring out my passion, using my gifts, serving people well, making an impact, and truly setting out to make the difference I know God is asking me to make, there’s no reason the income can’t follow. That doesn’t drive my decisions and ultimately I don’t really care, but that’s a reality we often don’t think about. It’s not an either/or type of choice. Rather, it’s an “I trust God” or “I don’t trust God” type of choice…….and an “I value money” or “I value meaning” type of choice. Whether we realize it or not, we make these choices every day, as not making a choice is still making a choice.

If I were still at my old job, this week I would have received a pretty sizable bonus. Out of respect for my former employer I won’t disclose what it would be…….but it’s a LOT! A former co-worker asked me a few days ago if this “lost bonus” gives me any regrets. Honestly, no. That money would be nice and could do a lot of cool things, but today my life is awesome and I get to dedicate each and every day to doing cool things. It’s honestly an unfair exchange, in my favor. Giving up a large chunk of money to violently pursue what I know to be God’s calling in my life. Knowing what I know today, in hindsight, it was the easiest decision I ever made.

So as I try to land this plane, here are my top three takeaways about this choice:

• Every day is a new opportunity to make a choice.

• Not making a choice is still making a choice.

• Find a few amazing mentors in life that will build you up, be real with you, encourage you when you need it most, and help you make better choices. We can’t do it alone…..and luckily we don’t have to!

What choice will you make?