Have Your Cake and Eat It, Too

A few days ago, I met a woman in Thailand who is familiar with our podcast. It was shocking that she knows who we are - especially on the other side of the world - but her kind words were uplifting and encouraging. One of the things she said struck me. She loves how we continually talk about and teach the importance of being financially responsible……while also living with meaning and enjoyment.

She went on to share how this mindset makes all the difference. It’s easy to put our mathematical hat on and make the ”best financial decision.” Doing so takes no effort and no thoughtfulness. We simply do the math and make whatever decision results in us having the most money. Unfortunately, when we let math guide all of our decisions, we turn into fun-hating robots. We hoard our resources, say “no” to anything fun, and constantly wonder when enough is enough (spoiler: it will never be). Conversely, living financially responsible AND with meaning allows us to disconnect ourselves from constantly making mathematical decisions.

Yes, let’s save, give, invest, and practice frugality in the various areas of life. These are inherently good things and our life will most certainly be better for having done them. However, let’s also take that trip, buy that thing, make that memory, eat that meal, and go to that event. These things add so much richness to our life. It’s about balance and intentionality. When we get it right, we truly can have our cake……and eat it, too.

Giving Money a Purpose

Yesterday, I was in the middle of a coaching session with a new client (they are awesome!) when a hugely important topic came up. I was walking them through the idea and execution of sinking funds (i.e. separate named bank accounts for specific categories - travel, house, car, medical, etc.) I don’t remember the exact wording, but to paraphrase, they were curious why someone would do it this way rather than just having all the money in one account and mentally earmarked for future use. I absolutely love this question!

In theory, having all the money in one big pot would achieve the same purpose….and be administratively easier. However, in practice, it makes a world of difference. Here are a few reasons why:

Commitment: If we house all our money in one big pot, we can just make an impulsive decision and mentally reallocate the funds from one use to another. It takes no energy or work to butcher months (or possibly years) of work. When we separate these funds into unique accounts that are specifically named for that use, we’re less likely to reallocate this money for a different use. Doing so requires us to consciously make a decision and physically transfer money from one fund to another.

Emotion: If we house all our money in one big pot, it’s easy for us to feel guilty or regretful about a particular decision we’ve made. For example, let’s say we’ve set aside some money for a trip to Disney. The moment we feel financial stress, we’ll think to ourselves, “well maybe there’s a more responsible use for this money. After all, I don’t NEED this trip.” And just like that, we’ve dismantled our trip and all the amazing memories that surely would have come from it. When we separate these same funds into our travel sinking fund, it’s clear what these monies are for. There’s no doubt about it. “Travel Fund.” It’s literally in the name of the bank account! When we do this, we’re emotionally able to let go of the guilt and the regret, and simply go enjoy that trip. It sounds silly, but it’s true!

Administrative: The idea of sinking funds sounds administratively difficult. After all, having multiple accounts seems more complex than having fewer accounts. However, the execution is an entirely different story. When we push money into these accounts each month as part of our budget, it’s clear where the money goes. When we want to know how much money we have for our next trip, there’s an account balance staring at us. And when we start spending these funds (plane tickets, hotels, gas, etc.), we always know where we stand with the remaining balance. In other words, we get transparency, and with that transparency comes better decisions.

If you’re interested in setting up sinking funds for your finances, most credit unions allow it. Most banks don’t, with one exception being Wells Fargo. If your bank doesn’t (like mine), CapitalOne 360 Performance Savings accounts work great. I’ve been using this platform for more than 15 years, as do many of my clients. If you want to hear more about sinking funds, we did a podcast episode about the topic back in June 2021. You can listen on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts.

Have an amazing day!

"I Would Have Felt Guilty"

I was recently meeting with a client who just did something out of character for his wiring. He purchased two things that were very much wants. Outdoor equipment and tickets to a few events. On the surface, these are very normal and customary purchases for most people…..but not for him. He’s wired as a big-time saver and these types of decisions don’t come easy for him. Despite what our cultural narrative says, not everyone is out there recklessly spending and spiraling themselves into debt. Many people deal with a polar opposite, but equally destructive habit: hoarding. This is a rampant problem caused by a “responsible” segment of our society that demonizes spending and applauds saving. And if saving some is applauded, saving more gets an even bigger applause. This sentiment, carried over years and decades, has led an entire generation into a hoarding mindset.

What I love about my young friend is his self-awareness of this potential pitfall in his behavior. He recognized it early, keenly knew it probably wasn’t healthy, then took steps to address it. Today, he has a healthy balance of saving, spending, and giving. When I asked him about these purchases, he was excited to share the news. It was pure and genuine excitement. He added, “Before we started working together, I would have felt guilty.” This time? No guilt. Not one ounce.

No guilt, no regrets, and no second-guessing. Just intentional decisions that fit into his broader plan, to create experiences with people he loves, which will turn into lifelong memories.