It Depends On How You Look at It

A few years ago, I was having a casual conversation with a fellow husband/father. We were talking about marriage and parenting, when we went down an interesting rabbit trail. He commented on how he and his wife hadn't been on an actual date in more than five years. Five years!?!? In short, he said they couldn't justify spending money on a babysitter. Between the babysitter, drinks, and dinner, a date night "is just too expensive to justify." So they don’t.

He quickly turned the tables on me by asking about our babysitter rhythm. I told him we spend about $200-$300/month on babysitting, which usually includes a few date nights. He looked at me as though I just went to the casino and threw my life savings on red. How irresponsible of me!!! He busted my chops a bit and couldn't believe someone "financially responsible" would throw away money like that.

He looked at babysitters as a needless cash drain. My perspective was a bit (ok, a lot) different. When we hire a babysitter, we aren't paying a young adult money to watch our kids. We are investing in our marriage. We are providing ourselves the opportunity to spend time together, one-on-one or with friends, and create memories aside from our children. It also allows us to recharge and get on the same page to be better spouses and parents. In other words, that babysitting money has an incredible return on investment!

Much of personal finance is a variation of this concept. It depends on how you look at it. Me walking into a Starbucks to order myself a burnt coffee = wasteful spending. Me meeting a youth group kid at Starbucks, their favorite coffee shop = an investment into my relationship with them. Me spending $60 on a monthly massage that I don't need = throwing away money. Me spending $60 on a monthly massage that helps recharge and eliminate aches = priceless. Me hiring an assistant isn’t cheap, and it takes money out of my pocket. Me hiring an assistant allows me more time and mental/emotional capacity to serve people better and unlock greater potential in our business.

Money is NEVER about money.....it's always about something bigger. If we can move past the dollars and cents and understand the real reason we do the things we do, we make better choices. It all depends on how you look at it.