Some Seeds Are Hard to Water

When it comes to work, ministry, and life, I often think about the idea of planting seeds. Whatever we’re doing, we have the opportunity, responsibility, and possibility to make an impact in someone’s life. This concept is the basis of my friend Gary Hoag’s book, The Sower. I highly recommend this one, by the way! When we water seeds, we never know how they will turn out. Some will sprout, while others won’t. Some will grow small, and some will grow big. But either way, they don’t sprout right when you water them…..it takes time. All we can do is diligently water, pray, water some more, and wait.

Some seeds are easy and fun to water. For me, that’s my youth group kids, clients, family, podcast listeners, readers, and speaking audiences. Watering those seeds is truly one of the greatest privileges of my life and there are very few things I’d rather do. Like all seeds, I never know which seeds will sprout, or when, but I love the process.

Some seeds, however, are hard to water. Yesterday, I found myself engaged in a brutal online conversation with a stranger. By “conversation”, I mean I got publicly eviscerated by someone and I tried to treat them with love. Yet, as I did, they continued to eviscerate me. I shared some of this conversation with my Facebook friends, partly as a way to set an example for handling our online presence with civility and dignity, and partly to hold myself accountable for handling my online presence with civility and dignity. After sharing this, I was flooded with thoughts and feedback from friends. I want to share a portion of one with you. This is from my friend, Laura H., and it moved me deeply.

“Years ago, when I was still in active addiction, I was like this person. I was so miserable with my life and was living in the victim mentality; basically feeling as if the "happy" and "got it all together" people of the world were mocking me with their encouraging posts or lessons on how to be better. In my mind I was a lost cause and "you people" needed to see that. The reason I tell you this is that, even though my comments spewed hate and insults, I was still watching. I read/listened to that person's stuff for a reason. A seed was planted and how that person responded to me decided if that seed would be watered and grow. I know that sounds like putting a big responsibility on someone, but in all actuality, it's the same responsibility that God puts on them to be disciples and share His Word and His Love. Getting back a response that validated my feelings always gave me a twinge of hope in the midst of my darkness. And I wouldn't comment anything else, but I would watch them. And I'd see them continue to be that genuine person to everyone else they interacted with. That also watered that seed. We never know what someone is dealing with and a compassionate response, even when you're angry or hurt, can make more of an impact than you even know. In all seriousness, it could save someone's life; that small twinge of hope is so powerful.”

Thank you so much, Laura! I’m grateful for your wisdom and your friendship. I needed to hear this, and many others do, too. Some seeds are hard to water….but it’s worth it.

Adventure (Not) For Adventure's Sake

As Sarah and I embark on our Asia trip, I’m sitting in the airport thinking about how much I missed international travel these past few years. I missed so much about it. The discomfort, the culture, the food, the sights, the history, the experiences……all of it! To be frank, travel is one of my favorite things.

But that’s also when I take a step back and ask myself why I enjoy traveling so much. For some, travel is adventure for adventure’s sake. To an extent, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with this. We should go enjoy life and have fun. I have no doubt about that. I support it, encourage it, and practice it. However, there’s a movement in our culture to make travel a lifestyle. The continual search for the next high. More adrenaline, more Instagram posts, more escapism.

I can see the allure of this approach…..it can be intoxicating. However, it can quickly become another way for us to selfishly hoard our resources and keep the focus on ourselves rather than others. While this type of life may be fun, if we pursue a life that’s simply about meeting our desires, we’re probably missing the meaning part.

What’s the alternative? For me, I try to view travel as something bigger. Yes, I’m going to have fun. Sarah and I have already had a blast on our first day of flights. But my bigger purpose has a few sides to it. The primary objective of this trip is to further an organization I’m involved in. We have some key meetings that will help shape its next chapter. It’s also an opportunity to spend time with our staff and the other leaders. These relationships matter so much to me. These people went from strangers, to colleagues, to friends, to family. I also want to invest in my marriage. Sarah doesn’t get the attention from me she deserves. This will be a good opportunity for her and I to bond, child-free. Lastly, I find that I become better (in many ways) when I experience other cultures. By understanding how people live, the things they value, and how they operate, I can learn, grow, and become a better version of myself. I trust I’ll come back from this trip with new ideas, a clearer sense of my mission, and better equipped to serve those who I wish to serve.

It’s adventure, but not for adventure’s sake.