Busyness and Happiness: Round 2

One of my favorite parts about writing this daily blog is the slew of messages I wake up to each morning from readers. Some thank me for the content, others disagree with my points, and many provide their own perspective. A few days ago, I wrote about the connection between busyness and happiness. My new friend, Randy, shared some thoughts about the topic via e-mail. While technology can be used to isolate people and do harm, it also has the power to bring people together like at no other time in history. I met Randy through this blog and I’ve learned so much from him through our many e-mail interactions. Randy, I’m grateful for you!

Randy’s first point to me: If we fill our lives with things that provide meaning, it creates joy and energizes us rather than deplete us. I’ve thought a lot about this since his e-mail hit my inbox. This is indeed true in my life. Even when I’m on the busier side of the spectrum, if the busyness comes from intentionally meaningful things, it does energize me and provides so much joy. It’s those days/weeks when my schedule is filled with less-than-meaningful things where I feel burned out.

Randy’s second point: if we want something done, ask a busy person, as they know where their free time is. Randy recognizes this one can be a double-edged sword, but it’s so true at its heart. Busy people tend to be the ones who get things done. On one hand, we don’t want to put a new responsibility on someone’s already-busy shoulders. On the other hand, it’s not our job to be their gatekeeper. The opportunity at hand may be just what they are looking for. It’s not our job to pre-judge it or make the decision for them. How many potentially world-changing things don’t exist today because someone pre-judged the other person’s decision and robbed them of an opportunity to say “yes”? I’ve experienced both sides of this. I’ve had people make my decision for me by withholding an opportunity that could have been powerful. I’ve also had people present something to me with, "I know you’re busy, but……”, then it led to something that positively changed my life forever.

Like most things in life, work, and money, this stuff isn’t black and white. If it were, it would be boring! Instead, we’re left with a world of possibilities and a lifetime to figure it out. While we do, it’s a pleasure to have people like Randy to journey with. Have a wonderful day, everyone!

Busyness and Happiness

As I was scrolling Facebook yesterday, I stumbled upon the words of my wise friend, Erin. “Don't confuse being BUSY with being HAPPY, and being HAPPY with being BUSY.” I think about this topic often, Not only do I agree with Erin, but I would argue there’s a inverse correlation. Based on my personal experience, and watching others, our happiness seems to be hindered as we get busier and busier. I feel like my life is one big endeavor to de-busy myself on the heels of busying myself. I never feel more meaning when I’m busier. Rather, when I’m busier, I feel more stress, pressure, fatigue, and overwhelmingness. I do a terrible job managing busyness during the work week, and a fantastic job managing it on the weekends. It feels like a life of extremes and contradictions.

When I’m living with peak meaning and happiness, it’s usually when I’m intentional with my “yes’s” and “no’s”, being mindful of my schedule, leaning into things that truly add value to my family’s life, and pulling away from everything else. To be honest, I think I get it right maybe 10% of the time. But that’s far better than the 0%-1% I used to get it right.

I don’t have answers today. Instead, I’m a work in progress. Most days, I feel like a mess. I’m going to leave you with a great little piece of advice I once heard from the great Jon Acuff. If someone asks you to do something down the road (one week, one month, one year from now), first ask yourself if you would say yes to it if it were tomorrow. If the answer is “no”, then you need to say “no”, as eventually it will be tomorrow. This advice has revolutionized my decision-making process.

Hope you have an awesome, not busy day!