Perhaps My Wife Should Leave Me

I recently stumbled into an online message board where people submit their monthly budgets for the broader group to provide feedback.

One person's budget included investing 55% of his monthly take-home income to "build wealth." The group loved it! "Way to go!" "Keep up the good work." "Your future is bright." He was lauded and applauded. Hundreds of comments poured in, ranging from congratulations to requests for advice.

Another person shared how he and his wife each bought new luxury cars and live in a mini-mansion in a prestigious gated community. The group loved it! "You earned it." "Enjoy the spoils of your labor." "That's a sign that you're a success." Some people put them on a pedestal. Some people wanted to know their secrets to winning. Others were jealous, but hopeful to one day be there as well.

Then there was another person. This was a middle-class family with an average income and a normal lifestyle. What caught my eye were a few giving categories in his budget. "Church giving," "xyz org giving," and a category that was clearly meant for people in need. He didn't highlight this in his post, but I did the math: his giving totaled approximately 18% of his monthly take-home income.

Do you think he was applauded like the two families above? Haha, of course not! He was utterly skewered. When I saw his budget, I knew exactly what the comments would look like. "You're an idiot." "Bible-beating moron." "Gullible sheep." Some people accused him of neglecting (or even abusing) his family. Some suggested his wife should leave him to find someone to care for his kids, not someone else's kids. 90% of the commenters agreed he was irresponsible and dumb.

I don't know what was going through that original poster's head as he saw the negative comments stream in. But if they know the secret I know, I hope they just sat back and smiled. Generosity always wins. Always. It's true that when we give money away, we have less money. That's a mathematical fact. This family will most likely have less money in the months, years, and decades to come. But they will be richer.....far richer. They will have more joy, more peace, more impact, more contentment, and more meaning. It's a trade-off. We can have the money, or we can have what really matters.

While getting absolutely destroyed by the commenters on that board, my prayer is that someone else was watching. Someone who knows deep down that generosity is the way. Someone who experiences our culture pushing him downstream, but has the urge to swim upstream. I hope this person was inspired by this man's post. Not just inspired, but enough to take action and eventually become the butt of everyone else's jokes.

I may be an idiot. I may be a "Bible-beating moron." I may be a gullible sheep. I may be neglecting my family. Perhaps my wife should leave me. Or maybe I just know a secret: generosity always wins.

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