“You’re Being Stupid”
While writing yesterday's post, I found myself reflecting on my current life vs. my previous life. Specifically, I remember one critical conversation with a close, trusted friend as I was on the verge of making the transition. "You're being stupid." Well, that wasn't the exact quote. The exact quote included an f-bomb in the middle......for emphasis, of course! Let's just say this friend thought I was making a life-altering mistake. I don't blame him, though. Taking a 90% pay cut to start your career over while trying to make ends meet may, in fact, qualify as "stupid."
I wouldn't trade my current life for all the money in the world. The funny thing is, though, my life doesn't look anything like I drew it up on the playbook:
I have a bunch of awesome coaching clients (that was the only part I knew I would do).
People pay me to speak at their events (still weird to me!).
I have the honor of sharing the Meaning Over Money message on podcasts and in my writing (one of the greatest honors of my life).
I get the surprise privilege of partially owning and jointly operating a coffee company (that wasn't on my bucket list bingo card).
I have a wonderful corporate client in Texas that I enjoy immensely.
Though all these things take up a ton of time, I have a lot of flexibility to parent my boys and invest in them.
In other words, I'm blessed beyond belief. It's easy to look back now and say my decision was the right thing to do. However, there were many times when it felt like the scariest thing in the world. Never mind all the people in my life who told me how terrible a decision I was making. "You're being a bad husband and father" was another fun comment made to me by a trusted friend. Ouch!
People's opinions matter. Their wisdom is valuable. We should seek out the insight of those we trust. Yes, all of those things. But ultimately, we need to make the best decision for our family......even if it's the opposite of what culture says is right. If I was feeling a bit more rowdy, I may even suggest, "especially if it's the opposite of what culture says is right."
If you want what everyone else has, do what they do. If you want the opposite of what everyone else has, do the opposite. Ultimately, it comes down to values.....your values.
I recently had a drink with my friend who told me I was stupid for leaving my career. We had a great time. Lots of reminiscing and lots of laughs. In the middle of the chat, he added, "You did the right thing." I'm not sure I needed that from him, but I think I needed that from him. Thanks, my man!
Follow meaning, even if it's hard. No, strike that. Especially if it's hard.